lame pick up lines - Page 3

bucutie02 · #31 03-13-2001, 09:42 PM

Okay well i dont think this would be sexual harassment or anything, but about 2 weeks ago i was at work....
i work at a children's private montessori school and like a daycare for the 18mths-5yr. old. Anyway i work in the front office and i just basically sit there and greet the parents when they come in to pick up their children.....
well this dad came in and as normal i was like "hi, how are you?" and he says "okay, how are you?" so i say "pretty good" and he replies with "yeah, pretty and good!!"
After the said that i was kind of in shock and didnt say anything. I didnt want to say "thank you" or anything of that sort! It did kind of bother me, but he has never said anything like that to me. He has always been really friendly- but mainly all the parents are.
I mean- if this came from some of my guy friends or any guy at school my age- i would think it would be funny or cute, but the thing is that this man has two kids- he's not 50 or anything but atleast 30. What do you guys think about this?

juniorgrrl · #32 03-13-2001, 09:57 PM

My current boyfriend had a thing in high school - he would ask every girl he met to marry him - he wanted to have 100 "wives"

One of the first things he said when he met me was "Hi, my name is Josh, I've never killed anyone, will you marry me?"

It wasn't a pick-up-line per se but it made me laugh.

orchid2 · #33 03-17-2001, 12:21 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sexy Mocha:
"Is that a mirror in your pants? Because I can see myself in them"

Still being in high school myself, I still hear all the worst of them! I've heard one kind of like that-

"You must wash your clothes in windex because I can see myself in your pants."

ALSO:

"You must be a farmer, because you raise a lot of cocks."

AAAH, the amazing humor of 9th grade boys... I wonder if they actually think this stuff makes girls swoon?!

TaraHopeful · #34 03-18-2001, 11:06 AM

ok...here's a good one. Not exactly a pick up line, but good for a few laughs:

Go up a woman.Say:
"I bet you 50 cents I can make your breasts wobble without touching them."

After her general sounds of disbelief, grab breasts and wobble them for a few seconds.
Hand over 50p/cents.
Admit defeat.

pirate00 · #35 03-19-2001, 05:32 PM

This is one that will repel any female:

You: Hey, do you have any black (or white) in you?

Her: Why, no.

You:Would you like some?

SLLLLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPP!

damasa · #36 03-20-2001, 03:06 AM

What craziness...being a guy..i usually just approach a girl and ask how she is doing, if she is having a fun time, and ask her what her damn name is, and remember it!

Some lines my friends have used:
This one my friend got slapped so hard he flew into a wall,
"Girl, if we were squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?"<---that's just jacked up.

Guys....listen...you want to talk to a girl, ask her how she is doing, get her name and remember it and if she's drunk, stop trying to get her to come home with you, if she likes you, she will remeber you in the morning, so always exchange numbers just in case.

Blaine

Billy Optimist · #37 03-22-2001, 05:34 PM

here's one I just though of. It won't be my opener or maybe it will, it depends. I'll try tomarrow night. "Jesus died for our sins, so lets go get his money's worth."

KSig RC · #38 03-22-2001, 05:44 PM

Here's a classic, definitely gotten a man slapped once or twice:

YOU: (look at wrist, even if no watch) my magic watch says you're not wearing any underwear!
HER: well, i am . . . (usually at least)
YOU: (tap wrist . . . ) well . . .hm . . . oh - it's an hour fast!

good for some laughs

Miami1839 · #39 03-22-2001, 05:54 PM

Heres one.....but of course I've never used lines in the past. As I've mentioned before. Anyways, I just made this one up.

You take care of this and I'll make breakfast

MaMaBuddha · #40 03-22-2001, 07:05 PM

here are some dumb lines.....

Hey baby you're so fine you make me stutter, wha-wha-what's your name?

Is your name Pepsi cause' I've gotta have it.

Which one of the Spice girls are you?

My love for you is like diaharrea, I just can't hold it in .

Did your father have sex with a carrot? Cause you've got nice eyes.

I have a .357 magnum pointed at your kidney. Wanna go get some coffee?

MeezDiscreet · #41 03-30-2001, 05:07 AM

i've heard my share of pick up lines...

- let me have your number so i can go study. when i told this guy he didn't need my number for that, he couldn't think of anything else to say because he wasn't expecting that

-once, a guy told me that he wanted enough sons to start a football team and if i was lucky, he'd let me donate a couple

-i have a real little samsung cellie and this guy asked to see it. a lot of people do so i let him. he proceeds to call his own cell phone (which was on vibrate) and gives me my phone back and told me to call him because he put his number in my phone and my phone in his. everytime he called, i was always "studying"

-you know how those credit card people hang around campus? well, one came to me and asked if he could go with me back to my dormroom because i "look like a freak"

-a guy asked if he could put the stuffing in my egg mcmuffin.

-and, i have even had a guy come up to me, look at my breast and just yell "wwwoooaaahhh!!!"

------------------
I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: "Mankind". Basically, it's made up of two separate words - "mank" and "ind". What do these words mean ? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind

[This message has been edited by MeezDiscreet (edited March 30, 2001).]

KABillyMac · #42 03-30-2001, 09:24 AM

My little brother sent me this earlier this week

MALE COMEBACKS TO FEMALE COMEBACKS
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
>>> > > Woman: Yes that's why I don't go there anymore.
>>> > > Man: Really? I heard it was because everyone there thinks
>>>you're a fat
>>> >slut.
>>> > >
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: Is this seat empty?
>>> > > Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
>>> > > Man: Probably because you'd be on your knees sucking my cock
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: Your place or mine?
>>> > > Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
>>> > > Man: That's cool, cause after I get done smackin' it to you
>>> > > in the back of my car...... I don't give a shit where
>>>you go.
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: So, what do you do for a living?
>>> > > Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
>>> > > Man: So that's how you got that little mustache.
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
>>> > > Woman: Do not enter.
>>> > > Man: Sure that isn't "yield to merging traffic"?
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
>>> > > Woman: Unfertilized.
>>> > > Man: No problem, I can always shoot my load on your back.
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
>>> > > Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
>>> > > Man: That works for me....... As long as you're still warm
>>> > > when I shove it up your ass.
>>> > >
>>> > > Male: Do you want to dance?
>>> > > Female: No!
>>> > > Male: I think you misheard me. I said
>>> > > your ass looks fat in those pants.
>>> > >
>>>
>>
>

Guys, I'm sorry. I know this was distasteful and unbecoming of a southern gentleman but I thought you'd get a kick out of it. Dont hold it against me.

[This message has been edited by KABillyMac (edited March 30, 2001).]

gphi2k · #43 03-30-2001, 10:19 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by KABillyMac:
My little brother sent me this earlier this week

MALE COMEBACKS TO FEMALE COMEBACKS
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
>>> > > Woman: Yes that's why I don't go there anymore.
>>> > > Man: Really? I heard it was because everyone there thinks
>>>you're a fat
>>> >slut.
>>> > >
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: Is this seat empty?
>>> > > Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
>>> > > Man: Probably because you'd be on your knees sucking my cock
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: Your place or mine?
>>> > > Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
>>> > > Man: That's cool, cause after I get done smackin' it to you
>>> > > in the back of my car...... I don't give a shit where
>>>you go.
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: So, what do you do for a living?
>>> > > Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
>>> > > Man: So that's how you got that little mustache.
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
>>> > > Woman: Do not enter.
>>> > > Man: Sure that isn't "yield to merging traffic"?
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
>>> > > Woman: Unfertilized.
>>> > > Man: No problem, I can always shoot my load on your back.
>>> > >
>>> > > Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
>>> > > Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
>>> > > Man: That works for me....... As long as you're still warm
>>> > > when I shove it up your ass.
>>> > >
>>> > > Male: Do you want to dance?
>>> > > Female: No!
>>> > > Male: I think you misheard me. I said
>>> > > your ass looks fat in those pants.
>>> > >
>>>
>>
>

Guys, I'm sorry. I know this was distasteful and unbecoming of a southern gentleman but I thought you'd get a kick out of it. Dont hold it against me.

[This message has been edited by KABillyMac (edited March 30, 2001).]

Billy Optimist · #44 03-30-2001, 05:56 PM

some of those were really good.

KABillyMac · #45 03-31-2001, 12:25 AM

Guys I want to apoligize for posting that I really should have cleaned it up a little before I posted it so I'm real sorry I thought for sure you guys who be lookin to have me hanged for posting it, but when Gphi reposted it there was nothing I could do