Bid Day Activiites? Drag show and groping?

[agzg]

I don't get the need for a passive aggressive separate thread. Why not just object to the activity in the actual thread, instead of creating a separate "calling them out for being inappropriate" thread?

For what it's worth - if the new members and actives all had a good time, and were fine with it, I don't see a problem. It's probably not what I would have chosen as New Member Coordinator (I always picked bowling) - but part of the fun of being young and in a greek organization are these crazy nights out where you just have fun (and drag shows are quite fun - I went to several while I was in college).

Since we're not sure whether they checked with the new members if they were cool with it before leaving campus, we can't exactly speak to "what's appropriate" or not.

Also, the night I recieved my bid, we went off campus to a keggar (hosted by sisters, in their apartment, chapter sponsored, no choice whether or not to go). Pick your poison.

[Leslie Anne]

I've got to agree with ThetaDancer. I'm far more troubled by the bashing this chapter is getting. I think those who are offended by it probably aren't the type of people who would pledge that chapter to begin with.

Yes, it's unconventional but I'm going to trust that the chapter is filled with unconventional girls. Personally, I think it sounded like a blast, but then my parents took me to a drag show for part of my Sweet 16 so that's where I'm coming from.

I think the issue should be dropped. It really isn't our place to criticize what another chapter of another sorority does for Bid Day.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by agzg

I don't get the need for a passive aggressive separate thread. Why not just object to the activity in the actual thread, instead of creating a separate "calling them out for being inappropriate" thread?

So as not to derail that thread, which consists of a PNM/NM's story and lots of congratulations, with a discussion on whether what her chapter planned was appropriate?

I don't see starting a seperate thread about it as passive-agressive at all. I see it as trying not to rain on the NM's parade and trying to keep any discussion about the one activity in question seperate from that particular NM's deserved celebration.

[Leslie Anne]

The more I think about it, the angrier I get that this thread was even started. It wasn't passive-agressive, it was intentionally condescending and arrogant. I haven't seen any AEPhis here commenting and those are the only people who should be involved. The rest of it is just self-congratulatory posturing.

If a New Member came on here and complained about their Bid Day activity it would be a totally different story but that hasn't happened and until it does, this is none of our business.

[agzg]

Originally Posted by Leslie Anne

The more I think about it, the angrier I get that this thread was even started. It wasn't passive-agressive, it was intentionally condescending and arrogant. I haven't seen any AEPhis here commenting and those are the only people who should be involved. The rest of it is just self-congratulatory posturing.

If a New Member came on here and complained about their Bid Day activity it would be a totally different story but that hasn't happened and until it does, this is none of our business.

Thank you.

[AlphaFrog]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

So as not to derail that thread, which consists of a PNM/NM's story and lots of congratulations, with a discussion on whether what her chapter planned was appropriate?

I don't see starting a seperate thread about it as passive-agressive at all. I see it as trying not to rain on the NM's parade and trying to keep any discussion about the one activity in question seperate from that particular NM's deserved celebration.

This.

I can personally see both sides of this. I probably would have been one of those girls who was uncomfortable with this being my first official intro to the sisterhood, but would have done it anyway (and probably had a good time) so I wouldn't be the weird one. I did a cabert style show in college, so I'm not uncomfortable with the actual activity...but in that case, I signed up for it. But, I guess if this is who your house is, then it works...if the NMs are turned off, then maybe they're in the wrong house, and at least they find that out right off the bat.

Ok, I'm done arguing with myself now...carry on.

[33girl]

I don't think the person who started the thread meant it to be that way - and I partially blame myself for asking for the link - but some of the subsequent comments have been straight up bitchiness.

Originally Posted by AlphaFrog

But, I guess if this is who your house is, then it works...if the NMs are turned off, then maybe they're in the wrong house, and at least they find that out right off the bat.

Exactly my point. I think these girls would have been more horrified by a night of sitting around in their jammies, doing each other's toenails, and watching chick flicks.

[AZTheta]

First, to our new AEPhi, again huge congratulations and much happiness to you and your sisters.

My lens was "risk" oriented. I always welcome and enjoy conversation and spirited debate, especially from those whose viewpoints differ from mine. It's been interesting to read what everyone thinks and realize that there probably is no "right" answer. @AlphaFrog, I like the "first date" approach/question and can see how it applies to this situation. @Alumiyum, I don't know that I agree that it's "horrible" to think about the founders, but I can see where context is critical and in this context, it simply doesn't work. Thanks for helping me see that. I really do appreciate it and it's given me something to think over.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by AzTheta

@Alumiyum, I don't know that I agree that it's "horrible" to think about the founders, but I can see where context is critical and in this context, it simply doesn't work. Thanks for helping me see that. I really do appreciate it and it's given me something to think over.

In many cases the "what would your founders think" question is used rather condescendingly with an intent to shame the actives (or you know, GC posters.) Particularly when it's coming from an outsider the question just rubs the wrong way. Our founders created our GLOs and are a big influence on us in that way, but they aren't perfect examples of how we should act/think/feel and they quite obviously came from a different time.

That's why the question is reacted to in that way in this context and nearly every other one.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by Drolefille

In many cases the "what would your founders think" question is used rather condescendingly with an intent to shame the actives (or you know, GC posters.) Particularly when it's coming from an outsider the question just rubs the wrong way. Our founders created our GLOs and are a big influence on us in that way, but they aren't perfect examples of how we should act/think/feel and they quite obviously came from a different time.

That's why the question is reacted to in that way in this context and nearly every other one.

This^. Sorry AzTheta, this is what I was getting at, I just didn't explain it as well.

[AZTheta]

Thanks Drolefille, I had NO IDEA about that. Context is everything. That will be put in the "no longer used" file. Appreciate your taking the time to clarify.

[AZTheta]

^No worries, got it now! I slapped myself on the forehead when I read Drole's post. Doh - really big doh. That's why it's good to listen to other peoples' points of view and keep an open mind, because things aren't always what I think they are. Thanks again to you all for sharing and explaining.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by Jen

So I'm the only one that thinks it sounds fun? LOL.

Nope, but I get that everyone's comfort levels are different.

[NutBrnHair]

Of course it's not appropriate.