Question for Rec Writers from a Rec Writer

[LAblondeGPhi]

Am I the only neurotic advisor here? I used to go through all of the registered sophomores and cross-check them with the pledge lists from the year before. I let the MVP know right away who had pledged elsewhere the year before. So I would be shocked if all of these chapters don't already know that she pledged elsewhere.

I think the only reason I would tell the chapter that she pledged another sorority last year would be if:
A) I now have some doubt that she'll make a committed member to my organization, and I want to warn my chapter
-or-
B) It can be mentioned in a narrative of how she's improved this year, matured, etc.

I would think that the mention of her previous affiliation would only hurt her, unless properly explained.

[AnchorAlumna]

Originally Posted by LAblondeGPhi

Am I the only neurotic advisor here? I used to go through all of the registered sophomores and cross-check them with the pledge lists from the year before.

Of course not! Last year was the first time in 30 years I'd worked with a live recruitment, and that was one of the first things I did.

[AZ-AlphaXi]

Originally Posted by LAblondeGPhi

Am I the only neurotic advisor here? I used to go through all of the registered sophomores and cross-check them with the pledge lists from the year before.

Absolutely not, that's always something I do every year, And not only the pledge lists but who may have dropped out and when.

[LAblondeGPhi]

Originally Posted by AnchorAlumna

Of course not! Last year was the first time in 30 years I'd worked with a live recruitment, and that was one of the first things I did.

Originally Posted by AZ-AlphaXi

Absolutely not, that's always something I do every year, And not only the pledge lists but who may have dropped out and when.

I knew we all thought the same

There's no way that these chapters don't already know this woman pledge a chapter last year, and know which chapter she pledged, and have already made assumptions based on that information. Maybe every individual sister doesn't know, but the leadership certainly does.

I think the only thing that mentioning it in the LOR does is to re-enforce that it's "something to keep an eye out for" from an alumna's perspective.

[AOII Angel]

Originally Posted by LAblondeGPhi

I knew we all thought the same

There's no way that these chapters don't already know this woman pledge a chapter last year, and know which chapter she pledged, and have already made assumptions based on that information. Maybe every individual sister doesn't know, but the leadership certainly does.

I think the only thing that mentioning it in the LOR does is to re-enforce that it's "something to keep an eye out for" from an alumna's perspective.

Or not mentioning it sounds like you knew nothing about it and don't really know anything about the PNM. It's not like the incident should be treated with kid gloves. Everyone knows the girl went through recruitment and pledged. Like I said, the alumna has the opportunity to clarify the situation to the chapter if she thinks the woman had a reasonable story or warn her chapter if she didn't. Either way, not mentioning it sounds like you had no clue the girl ever went through recruitment at all.

[greekdee]

Oh, she's at a mega competitive school alright. Is it in poor form for me to say which school? Would it help with thoughts on the best approach? Campuses can be so different from one another.

I'm friends with her aunt and uncle and have known them for a long time, but I also know her. In high school, she was involved with student council and band/flag corp all four years -- in other words, she didn't bounce from activity to activity, but was consistent.

I'll speak with her when she contacts me (which I understand she is going to be doing), but I really think she just felt like she couldn't find her home in the sorority she pledged. Honestly, I think she is going to be in for one tough haul. This school has 17-18 sororities and she was dropped by all except the one she pledged. Plus, re-rushing as a sophomore? I'm afraid she will be released from recruitment very early on.

[gee_ess]

Originally Posted by greekdee

Oh, she's at a mega competitive school alright. Is it in poor form for me to say which school? Would it help with thoughts on the best approach? Campuses can be so different from one another.

I'm friends with her aunt and uncle and have known them for a long time, but I also know her. In high school, she was involved with student council and band/flag corp all four years -- in other words, she didn't bounce from activity to activity, but was consistent.

I'll speak with her when she contacts me (which I understand she is going to be doing), but I really think she just felt like she couldn't find her home in the sorority she pledged. Honestly, I think she is going to be in for one tough haul. This school has 17-18 sororities and she was dropped by all except the one she pledged. Plus, re-rushing as a sophomore? I'm afraid she will be released from recruitment very early on.

In your next rec, you can give more suggestions for ways to talk to her or remind them that she is a quiet young lady who doesn't gush, etc. (if that is the case) .I would write the rec with the focus of your comments to be , 'Give this girl a good look. You missed her last time"

[GPhiBLtColonel]

...I'd do her rec and I would address the elephant on the room - eg that she had rushed and pledged last year (even though that information is most likely already known) but I would clearly state why her "history" should not prevent your sorority from giving her another look, further consideration etc - be specific as to what her strengths are and what she would add to the chapter. Sometimes the collegians don't realize the value of certain PNMs so it behooves us alums to tell them Also wanted to mention that at UGA, for instance, a sophomore is considered for rush purposes to be an upperclassman and thus has a separate quota #

[33girl]

Originally Posted by GPhiBLtColonel

Also wanted to mention that at UGA, for instance, a sophomore is considered for rush purposes to be an upperclassman and thus has a separate quota #

That chapters may or may not choose to utilize. i.e., chapters do not HAVE to take sophomores or any other upperclassmen if they don't want to.

[DubaiSis]

Then at least you know her. Being honest with yourself, did she have a rough first time through rush, or is she just not going to be Auburn or Bama (or whatever) sorority material? I think a girl can not be mentally prepared for rush, get cut heavily after round one and then just implode. That wouldn't mean she couldn't have a better result the second time around, especially if she'd done the required legwork throughout her freshman year. Or maybe you'd be doing a service to her to suggest she seek out other activities.

[greekdee]

Again, thanks for all the insight. There really are numerous things to consider! Some had not even crossed my mind, so I'm glad I asked.

[violetpretty]

I can really see both sides of the argument, but I'd have a conversation with this woman to get more details about her NM period. I'd want to know if she truly made an effort to get to know people, or if she was just dissapointed about her results and skated through the NM without really trying (which is what I suspect).

"Sticking it out" until initiation doesn't just mean not depledging. It means truly trying to find your niche in the chapter, taking on little opportunities to be involved, taking initiative to hang out before, after, and outside of sorority events. And it sounds like this is a school with very large chapters...so in a chapter of a couple hundred women, I don't see how she could not find anyone to click with. I'm not buying the "I don't fit" story at a school with chapters that big. It sounds like a case of "I'm in the least popular sorority at my school and I will be embarrassed to wear these letters for the next 4 years."

[CutiePie2000]

Originally Posted by greekdee

I recently found out that one of my 2011 rec girls depledged right before her initiation. .....She has decided to go through recruitment again Fall 2012 at the same SEC school, and is planning to ask her rec-writers from last year to provide them again.

Quick question for your savvy NPC women: How can this person be eligible for Recruitment 2012? Doesn't she have to wait a FULL CALENDAR YEAR from when she renounced the group that she accepted the bid from? (i.e. the one that she dropped just before initiation) Assuming that she "stuck it out" for 6 weeks or so beyond bid acceptance day (or however long the pledge period lasts), is this even permissible?

[Greek_or_Geek?]

Originally Posted by CutiePie2000

Quick question for your savvy NPC women: How can this person be eligible for Recruitment 2012? Doesn't she have to wait a FULL CALENDAR YEAR from when she renounced the group that she accepted the bid from? (i.e. the one that she dropped just before initiation) Assuming that she "stuck it out" for 6 weeks or so beyond bid acceptance day (or however long the pledge period lasts), is this even permissible?

She is bound to that bid for a full "bid year" from the day it was extended to her. By full calendar year, it really means from the previous year's formal recruitment bid day to this year's. Sometimes it isn't quite a full calendar year if the dates of recruitment change a bit; say bid day was September 5 last year and it's September 1 this year, but that's the spirit of the rule.

[LAblondeGPhi]

Originally Posted by CutiePie2000

Quick question for your savvy NPC women: How can this person be eligible for Recruitment 2012? Doesn't she have to wait a FULL CALENDAR YEAR from when she renounced the group that she accepted the bid from? (i.e. the one that she dropped just before initiation) Assuming that she "stuck it out" for 6 weeks or so beyond bid acceptance day (or however long the pledge period lasts), is this even permissible?

Agree with all the previous posts, and it doesn't matter how long she stuck it out, it just matters when she received the bid. So a woman who signed her preference card and never showed up to bid day would be eligible at the same time that a woman who stuck it out until the day before initiation is (assuming both pledged in the same "season/semester/quarter").