Big Poblem-HUGE

Blue Violet · #1 03-17-2003, 08:23 PM

OoooooKay-
Long story short:One of our advisors stole our presidents boyfriend. The advisor claims she didn't know they were dating. Well they'd been dating for like two years! I am so mad at her. The whole chapter is about torn inhalf.These are two VERY popular, VERY powerful and influential people at our school and they already butted heads a bit because-like I've mentioned before-our alum/advisors tend to be REALLY opinionated and can't just "let go" a bit. Anyway-now they are both petitioning to national to get the other's membership revoked and it's turning into this war. It's getting to where I think one of them is starting to make things up-or at least REALLY exagerate some stuff that happened in the past to make the other look really bad and themselves a little better. I don't know what to do. Our chapter is literally torn in half.

Dionysus · #2 03-17-2003, 08:28 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Blue Violet
OoooooKay-
Long story short:One of our advisors stole our presidents boyfriend. The advisor claims she didn't know they were dating. Well they'd been dating for like two years!

BS!!!!!!

I would report them to student life or who ever has the last say in student organizations!

Dianne · #3 03-17-2003, 09:07 PM

First of all, shame on your alum!! Second of all, shame on everyone who is more concerned with drama and reputations than sisterhood. My suggestion is this - if both are petitioning nationals, could an uninvolved (and not loyal to either side) third party from the chapter (for instance, you) write to nationals and tell them that this is all BS and provide the real story and an actual plausible solution?

33girl · #4 03-17-2003, 11:05 PM

OMG!!!!! This is why they want advisors to be out of school at least 5 years (I'm assuming your 60 year old advisor didn't steal a sister's boyfriend).

If the school can move the advisor to another area that might help....

pinkyphimu · #5 03-17-2003, 11:10 PM

this is so silly! my junior year, one of the girls i lived with starting dating my ex-boyfriend. basically, she and i were adults and didn't let it get involved with our chapter. there were some girls who took it upon themselves to decide who was right and who was wrong, but she and i didn't bring it to the chapter. these two women need to keep it out of sorority business. i hope your national office laughs this off!!! silly girls.

Blue Violet · #6 03-17-2003, 11:21 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by pinkyphimu
this is so silly! my junior year, one of the girls i lived with starting dating my ex-boyfriend. basically, she and i were adults and didn't let it get involved with our chapter. there were some girls who took it upon themselves to decide who was right and who was wrong, but she and i didn't bring it to the chapter. these two women need to keep it out of sorority business. i hope your national office laughs this off!!! silly girls.

And see, that's part of the problem. Other people sticking their nose into business that's not theirs. I'm trying to stay out of it, but it's really hard to when everyone is gossiping.I think our prez wouldn't have been so upset until others started rattling her feathers ya know? And this particular advisor, tough as she is, does care about our chapter and is an asset. Anyway, I just wanted to vent. Maybe some of them will read this and see how silly they are being.
And no, it's not our 60 year old advisor!!Eeeew.

shadokat · #7 03-17-2003, 11:37 PM

While I agree that an advisor dating a collegiate's ex in the same sorority is not cool in my eyes, I don't think it is any of the sorority's business to worry about sisters and their personal relationship. If having this person as an advisor to your chapter is detrimental to the chapter's well-being, I would contact your HQs and ask for a new advisor. But this doesn't sound to me as grounds for anyone's deactivation.

33girl, I agree wholeheartedly with you!! 5 years out is a good start

ilovemyglo · #8 03-18-2003, 11:21 AM

I am in a similar situation. I went back for formal only to find out my sweetheart was dating another sister (well, "dating" used in the loose sense). All my sisters loved him and they all wanted to date him when I was active but they didn't because they knew how much he really meant to me. I know I broke up with him and that makes him fair game in some eyes, but she was a member when I was there and she likes to do things to disrespect older members.
Meanwhile I am so mad about it. And the fact that the chapter tried to hide it from me infuriates me, i would have been fine if they had just been up front about it, but they acted all secret and stuff.