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Welcome to our newest member, hnnahcahvso7997 |
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07-28-2022, 05:52 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Sweet Home Alabama
Posts: 4,602
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shadokat
You sound like someone with valid opinions
I know that my friend's daughter who rushed at Alabama 2 years ago had a HELL of a time getting recs for all of the sororities, and the ones she didn't have cut her immediately. She went through Zoom Recruitment, so didn't meet anyone in person until bid day. I thought it was sort of shitty to cut someone simply because they don't know someone in an organization.
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This is where you network. Did you know alums in the other groups that could have done it for her based on your rec? Did she ask everyone who did a rec if they knew people in the other groups? Did she contact the nearest alum PH? Or the national offices of the other groups? Did she search FB for rec writing groups? (they are out there because I belong to one and I'm the only Alabama person on it). Sure, you'll end up missing out on some, but it should not be a lot.
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07-29-2022, 01:46 PM
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Moderator
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Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Reading, PA
Posts: 4,132
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I found four recs for her. I think she was missing three total.
My point here is that you're asking if she jumped through 7,000 hoops for these recommendations from people who don't even know her! What is the value in that? I would think a recommendation from a boss, teacher or clergy person would be much more valuable in terms of a real recommendation than a stranger. Maybe I just am misunderstanding this whole thing.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Titchou
This is where you network. Did you know alums in the other groups that could have done it for her based on your rec? Did she ask everyone who did a rec if they knew people in the other groups? Did she contact the nearest alum PH? Or the national offices of the other groups? Did she search FB for rec writing groups? (they are out there because I belong to one and I'm the only Alabama person on it). Sure, you'll end up missing out on some, but it should not be a lot.
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Be a leader; Be Yourself; Be DPhiE - Esse Quam Videri
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07-29-2022, 04:07 PM
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Super Moderator
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Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 14,356
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In my experience, alums who don't know a PNM will often ask around about her.
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07-29-2022, 06:00 PM
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Moderator
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Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Hotel Oceanview
Posts: 34,567
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I will say again that meshing all this recommendation and legacy elimination together with the pandemic is the worst idea women have had since suffrage got tangled up with Prohibition.
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It is all 33girl's fault. ~DrPhil
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07-29-2022, 06:51 PM
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Super Moderator
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Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 14,356
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Yes! Spot on!
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07-29-2022, 07:33 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Sweet Home Alabama
Posts: 4,602
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shadokat
I found four recs for her. I think she was missing three total.
My point here is that you're asking if she jumped through 7,000 hoops for these recommendations from people who don't even know her! What is the value in that? I would think a recommendation from a boss, teacher or clergy person would be much more valuable in terms of a real recommendation than a stranger. Maybe I just am misunderstanding this whole thing.
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Well, 3 out of 18 isn't bad...and she would more than that release her anyway just to get to the number of parties that day. So, bravo for her! As for the rest of your statement, are you saying that "friend of the family" isn't good enough? Sweetie, I write a ton of recs based on the recommendation of friends. In fact, that's even a category on our rec form!
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08-01-2022, 02:12 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Reading, PA
Posts: 4,132
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First off, please don't call me sweetie. I don't know you, and whether or not you meant it as a jab, it feels like it and it's immature.
Second, she went to preference at 2 of the 18 chapters she DIDN'T have a recommendation for and joined one of them.
My entire point was not to say that recommendations aren't good - clearly they provide information to chapters about PNMs. That being said, I would value one that was from someone who actually knows the PNM rather than the friend of the friend who plays tennis with her mother once a month.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Titchou
Well, 3 out of 18 isn't bad...and she would more than that release her anyway just to get to the number of parties that day. So, bravo for her! As for the rest of your statement, are you saying that "friend of the family" isn't good enough? Sweetie, I write a ton of recs based on the recommendation of friends. In fact, that's even a category on our rec form!
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__________________
Be a leader; Be Yourself; Be DPhiE - Esse Quam Videri
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08-01-2022, 05:07 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Sweet Home Alabama
Posts: 4,602
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Quote:
Originally Posted by shadokat
First off, please don't call me sweetie. I don't know you, and whether or not you meant it as a jab, it feels like it and it's immature.
Second, she went to preference at 2 of the 18 chapters she DIDN'T have a recommendation for and joined one of them.
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First off, "sweetie" is a VERY acceptable southern term of endearment. I'm from Aabama. We say it all the time. I use it a lot for people younger than I (I'm 76).
Second you orginally made it sound like all the groups she didn't have a rec for released her. Pardon my misunderstanding.
Last edited by Titchou; 08-01-2022 at 06:08 PM.
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