It's not about ME-A mom's rush story

[DGTess]

OK, this is the third post in which you've referred to your social circle.

Guess some of us don't measure up.

Out here.

[TXDG]

Originally Posted by DGTess

OK, this is the third post in which you've referred to your social circle.

Guess some of us don't measure up.

Out here.

I grew up in a community like OP's where for a certain set of families, there are only three "acceptable" sororities to join and the social pecking order of women is dictated for life based on their sorority affiliation. If their daughters got cut from all three, the options were 1) drop out of rush and concoct some story about why daughter decided to pursue other interests in college, 2) immediately withdraw from school and enroll in a school that hasn't held rush yet, or 3) transfer to a school where those three chapters are WRCs, get a bid, and then transfer back to prestigious chapter after initiation.

Option #3 has gotten much more difficult to do in the internet age but #1 and #2 still happen every year to a few girls. There was one girl in my high school class who went through rush at Arkansas, somewhere else (can't remember), and finally Baylor before she got her KKG bid- this was all in the first 5 months of her freshman year!!

It sounds silly but kudos to this mom (who is probably experiencing snide comments and condescending looks from her social peers) for allowing her daughter to choose her own path in life.

[kitekat]

Originally Posted by TXDG

There was one girl in my high school class who went through rush at Arkansas, somewhere else (can't remember), and finally Baylor before she got her KKG bid- this was all in the first 5 months of her freshman year!!

That is fascinating to me

I hope she felt it was worth all the trouble in the end. Did she stay at Baylor, or transfer again after she got her bid?

[TXDG]

Originally Posted by kitekat

That is fascinating to me

I hope she felt it was worth all the trouble in the end. Did she stay at Baylor, or transfer again after she got her bid?

I'm pretty sure she stayed and graduated from Baylor. The ironic thing about that girl is that she now lives out in the middle of nowhere with her husband and a couple of kids and they seem to be deliriously happy living their farm life. Even getting her into the "right" sorority didn't keep her from navigating her own path in life.

Her mom is a past Junior League of Dallas president, past sorority alumnae group president, chaired several of the biggest charity balls in town, "Top 10 Best Dreased" honoree, etc. I'm not close enough to know what their mother-daughter relationship is like.

[ComradesTrue]

Originally Posted by TXDG

I grew up in a community like OP's where for a certain set of families, there are only three "acceptable" sororities to join and the social pecking order of women is dictated for life based on their sorority affiliation. If their daughters got cut from all three, the options were 1) drop out of rush and concoct some story about why daughter decided to pursue other interests in college, 2) immediately withdraw from school and enroll in a school that hasn't held rush yet, or 3) transfer to a school where those three chapters are WRCs, get a bid, and then transfer back to prestigious chapter after initiation.

Yes to all of this. I am not saying that I agree with it, but I have personally seen it happen.

I remember vividly several girls moving out of my freshmen dorm before school even started to transfer to Baylor. One would think they could have waited until semester since Baylor has January recruitment but the social stigma of No Sorority or Wrong Sorority was too much for the girl (family?) to bear.

I also remember a girl down the hall from me freshmen year who declared she would be an ABC, which on our campus was one of the 2 (of 10 total) strongest recruiting chapters. She was cut after 2nd round and immediately dropped out, despite having quite a few chapters left.

She re-rushed sophomore year, again declaring that it was with the sole intention of being an ABC. This time I am not even sure she made it past 1st round with them. Once again she dropped, but this time moved out of the dorm and transferred schools. She chose to attend StateU-SmallTownBranch which was definitely a commuter school. However, they had a chapter of her precious ABC. Because this was in the age of semester long pledgeships she had to stay there all year in order to be initiated in January. The following fall guess who was back on our campus wanting to affiliate? And guess what chapter told her no? She was in letters every single day letting everyone under the sun know that she was an ABC, yet she had been rejected by our school's chapter 3x. I often wonder if it was worth it to her. She had the social prestige that her insecurity craved but with absolutely no friends in the organization or any college membership benefits.

[AnchorAlum]

Originally Posted by TXDG

I grew up in a community like OP's where for a certain set of families, there are only three "acceptable" sororities to join and the social pecking order of women is dictated for life based on their sorority affiliation. If their daughters got cut from all three, the options were 1) drop out of rush and concoct some story about why daughter decided to pursue other interests in college, 2) immediately withdraw from school and enroll in a school that hasn't held rush yet, or 3) transfer to a school where those three chapters are WRCs, get a bid, and then transfer back to prestigious chapter after initiation.

Option #3 has gotten much more difficult to do in the internet age but #1 and #2 still happen every year to a few girls. There was one girl in my high school class who went through rush at Arkansas, somewhere else (can't remember), and finally Baylor before she got her KKG bid- this was all in the first 5 months of her freshman year!!

It sounds silly but kudos to this mom (who is probably experiencing snide comments and condescending looks from her social peers) for allowing her daughter to choose her own path in life.

May be doubtful - if she's from a certain bubble city things change at glacial speed. God forbid she should ever move.