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From one non-drinking INFJ to another... I totally get it. I didn't enjoy fraternity parties and only went when I had to do so. Loved my sorority and was very active, but loud social events were not my thing then and they still aren't today.
I agree with the suggestion to make the effort to set up INFJ-friendly events. You'll find other women like you. You don't need to find fifty women to hang out with and be close to. If you find a circle of women, you'll be fine.
And I also agree with the idea that you might find your closest sisters in the classes after you. Most of the women I'm still close to today were in pledge classes after mine.
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"Let us found a society that shall be kind alike to all and think more of a girl's inner self and character than of her personal appearance." Sarah Ida Shaw
My recruitment story: My sorority membership changed my life.
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