bid day gone wrong..so sorry this is long but heres my story

[Blue Skies]

As others have already explained, there was no mistake. You were at pref for your favorite two chapters (that alone means they did like you and could see you as a potential sister,) so you WERE on their respective bid lists. The question is what ranked number you were on each list. If you were number one, five, ten, etc. you would have matched and gotten a bid. Unfortunately you were on the lower end for each chapter and other girls matched ahead of you. If your favorite chapters each have 40 new members, then each one of those girls matched ahead of you.

Will you have success if you rerush? No one here can tell you that. You can certainly try. In your favor, you now have more friends in each chapter. To your detriment, you will be another year older and will now have a track record of not accepting a bid from a chapter that was on your pref card. Improving your grades, clubs, activities, and volunteer work might help you out.

In the future, do NOT put a chapter on your pref card if you have no intention of joining it.

[MaryPoppins]

Originally Posted by Blue Skies

In the future, do NOT put a chapter on your pref card if you have no intention of joining it.

This. By putting the third chapter on her list, OP took a bid from another PNM who probably actually wanted that third chapter. And that is also another reason why it looks bad that you declined the bid.

[chi-o_cat]

Originally Posted by Blue Skies

In the future, do NOT put a chapter on your pref card if you have no intention of joining it.

But her roommate's best friend's lab partner told her that if she didn't list all 3 chapters that she preffed, the system would automatically kick her out!

[Jenitx]

Originally Posted by chi-o_cat

But her roommate's best friend's lab partner told her that if she didn't list all 3 chapters that she preffed, the system would automatically kick her out!

Unfortunately that is EXACTLY what my niece was told just this weekend during recruitment at UT. And so she listed a 3rd choice that she really did not have an interest in. And got that choice and walked away. I am so upset with her for not giving this precious chapter a chance and so upset with the process that doesn't make this clear to the PNM. It sucked for everyone.

[pinapple]

Originally Posted by Jenitx

Unfortunately that is EXACTLY what my niece was told just this weekend during recruitment at UT. And so she listed a 3rd choice that she really did not have an interest in. And got that choice and walked away. I am so upset with her for not giving this precious chapter a chance and so upset with the process that doesn't make this clear to the PNM. It sucked for everyone.

Had your niece not listed this 3rd choice chapter, she would have gotten a phone call that she had been released from recruitment. The process worked for her. She got a bid. I saw a few girls outside of HOGG on Monday who I was down right embarrassed for. Girls who had cards in their hands and walked away. They will never experience bid day even if they change their mind and take their bid (which by the way your niece can still do) Girls who were with THEIR MOTHERS and still walked away. I guess closed mindedness is a taught skill. Really really sad.

[utkdce]

Originally Posted by pinapple

Had your niece not listed this 3rd choice chapter, she would have gotten a phone call that she had been released from recruitment. The process worked for her. She got a bid. I saw a few girls outside of HOGG on Monday who I was down right embarrassed for. Girls who had cards in their hands and walked away. They will never experience bid day even if they change their mind and take their bid (which by the way your niece can still do) Girls who were with THEIR MOTHERS and still walked away. I guess closed mindedness is a taught skill. Really really sad.

It is so sad. Sometimes it is the mother that can't accept that their daughter did not get a sorority that the mother considers good enough. In the not so distant past, I witnessed a mother removing her daughter from bid day activities at UT, after the daughter was already wearing her bid day t-shirt. Can you imagine the pain that daughter felt? Disgusting behavior by a grown woman. Yet another example of the brutality of recruitment at Texas.

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by utkdce

It is so sad. Sometimes it is the mother that can't accept that their daughter did not get a sorority that the mother considers good enough. In the not so distant past, I witnessed a mother removing her daughter from bid day activities at UT, after the daughter was already wearing her bid day t-shirt. Can you imagine the pain that daughter felt? Disgusting behavior by a grown woman. Yet another example of the brutality of recruitment at Texas.

[33girl]

That just makes me hope that the daughter ends up marrying an agnostic tattoo artist or Pauly D or something.

[amIblue?]

Originally Posted by utkdce

In the not so distant past, I witnessed a mother removing her daughter from bid day activities at UT, after the daughter was already wearing her bid day t-shirt.

Just

[ZTA1550]

Originally Posted by utkdce

It is so sad. Sometimes it is the mother that can't accept that their daughter did not get a sorority that the mother considers good enough. In the not so distant past, I witnessed a mother removing her daughter from bid day activities at UT, after the daughter was already wearing her bid day t-shirt. Can you imagine the pain that daughter felt? Disgusting behavior by a grown woman. Yet another example of the brutality of recruitment at Texas.

How incredibly rude!

[ASTalumna06]

Wow. Aside from that being rude, it is also incredibly demeaning. The last time my mother dragged me away from something was when I was 5.

[cinder1965]

Originally Posted by utkdce

It is so sad. Sometimes it is the mother that can't accept that their daughter did not get a sorority that the mother considers good enough. In the not so distant past, I witnessed a mother removing her daughter from bid day activities at UT, after the daughter was already wearing her bid day t-shirt. Can you imagine the pain that daughter felt? Disgusting behavior by a grown woman. Yet another example of the brutality of recruitment at Texas.

WTH? Are you for real? I am trying to picture this scene in my mind and, well, I just can't.

[TriDeltaSallie]

Originally Posted by cinder1965

WTH? Are you for real? I am trying to picture this scene in my mind and, well, I just can't.

I can't either. But that chapter dodged a bullet. They won't have to deal with them for the next four years.

[Jill1228]

Originally Posted by utkdce

It is so sad. Sometimes it is the mother that can't accept that their daughter did not get a sorority that the mother considers good enough. In the not so distant past, I witnessed a mother removing her daughter from bid day activities at UT, after the daughter was already wearing her bid day t-shirt. Can you imagine the pain that daughter felt? Disgusting behavior by a grown woman. Yet another example of the brutality of recruitment at Texas.

Oh. Hell. To. The. No
I can't even

[AOII*Azra-elle]

We had one girl in absolute tears this year. She preffed us and another house. Her friend accepted a bid from the other house and she from us. She lied to us at Bid Day and told us that her parents were in town and wanted to soend time with her. Two of our sisters walked her out when her ‘parents’ got there only to find out she called friends to come get her bc she didn’t want her bid from us anymore. Why accept the bid if you aren’t going to at least give the new member process a chance? Why take the spot from someone else who may have really wanted a bid from us? And then why lie? As I am handing you your new member goodie pack and book, just be straight with me.

My understanding is that she thinks they’ll give her a bid—-that she cannot accept for a year. And, that chapter is above campus total, so they won’t be doing COB or spring recruitment. I have no sympathy at this point.

If you accept a bid, give it a chance and get to know the women. You may truly love it. If you don’t see yourself in that house, don’t pref them.

Originally Posted by pinapple

Had your niece not listed this 3rd choice chapter, she would have gotten a phone call that she had been released from recruitment. The process worked for her. She got a bid. I saw a few girls outside of HOGG on Monday who I was down right embarrassed for. Girls who had cards in their hands and walked away. They will never experience bid day even if they change their mind and take their bid (which by the way your niece can still do) Girls who were with THEIR MOTHERS and still walked away. I guess closed mindedness is a taught skill. Really really sad.