Extracurriculars..too much or too little?

[ASTalumna06]

Originally Posted by snowflakemom

I have daughters in elementary and middle school. We're figuring out how to juggle schedules and finding it tough since both my husband and I work. For any other moms out there, how much is enough extracurricular activities and how much is too little? We're exhausted and just wondering if all the energy and transportation craziness is worth it. Each of my daughters does two activities so it doesn't seem like that much but it adds up. We do carpool but it still seems like we're always on the run.

I don't think there's a set number when it comes to extracurriculars. It's all about what a family can manage/afford.

Your kids are still young, so they're still trying to figure out what they want to do. When I was young, there were a few years where I was doing dance, gymnastics, basketball, swimming, and participating in Odyssey of the Mind. I'm not sure how my parents did it, especially because I also have a brother who was participating in his own activities.

However, once I got to high school, I realized that my real passion was swimming, and all the other sports were dropped. And by that point, I was driving a car and my parents didn't have to drive me all over town. How old is the daughter in middle school? Is she nearing the driving age? Will she soon be able to drop off and pick up your younger daughter when you and your husband need some help?

Again, it's really up to you at this point. Carpools definitely help, but you're still going to have to deal with feeling like a chauffeur from time to time.

[OPhiAGinger]

Snowflakemom, I'm at that exact same stage of family life. As long as my girls' extracurricular activities were on their campus after school, the leaders could just check them out of their on-site after-school program they were involved with and check them back in when it was finished. Unfortunately, the mid-week sports practices were starting to stress me out because they had to be in their gear and at the field (which was not at their school) before I normally even got home from work. And I had a third child who was only 3 and who would soon be starting his own schedule of fun. I knew I had to make a change.

What worked for me was getting an after-school nanny, a local college student who lives nearby. She picked all three of my kids up from school at 3 pm, including the little guy who was still in daycare, and took them home. She gave them a snack, supervised homework, helped them find missing cleats, etc, and got them to their various meetings and practices on time. Miss Erica quickly became part of the family. She has been with us for three years now and even though she has a reduced schedule this year (her college commitments got more demanding as she progressed through her program) it's still working well.

[33girl]

I'm not sure how old you are, but from what I understand it's not like when I (I'm in my mid 40s) was in JH and HS and you could easily be in a million things at a time. Nowadays each activity is a lot more intense. Marching band isn't just a couple rehearsals a week and 10 football games, it's marching AND competition band, rehearsal every night, competitions on whatever weekend slots the football team isn't playing in. That was starting to happen even when I was in high school.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by ASTalumna06

I don't think there's a set number when it comes to extracurriculars. It's all about what a family can manage/afford.

This, this, this. You'll go nuts if you gauge what you're doing by what other families are doing. I like AGDee's plan: no more than 2, though often it's been one at a time for our kids (not counting church activities). Two was fine for daughter when dance was one day a week, but now that it's 3 days a week, that's pretty much it for her.

And school comes first. Always.