University of Mississippi - Ole Miss Panhellenic Sorority Recruitment 2013

[OleMissGlitter]

I don't have a problem with parents coming to Bid Day...although it is next level with how many attend compared to 1996 when I pledged and even when I was a chapter advisor in the early 2000s. With that being said, the best thing as a parent you can do is to be supportive. If your daughter ends up at her 2nd or even 3rd choice then please be supportive. If she ends up at her first choice and it wasn't your legacy house be supportive too. Also, let her have her time with her family of sisters. I think it is perfectly appropriate to stick around and attend the small parties that the chapters will have on Bid Day at their house. But if the chapter is going somewhere else for more fun (some do Double Decker tours, some have fun in the Grove with bounce houses, etc) then I suggest you don't attend that. It can make older members and even advisors feel uncomfortable if there are parents lurking. I know my parents did not come up and I don't think I would have wanted them there. This was my experience. I shared with them my journey as a PNM through the phone and they were just fine. Also keep in mind, that with over 300 members after bid day in each chapter things can be tight at the houses. So when you add a pledge class’ moms/dads/aunts/etc it can be very crowded! So, keep that in mind. I know last year of a mom who met her daughter at her new sorority and hugged her, gave her some flowers, and then she left. To me, that is a perfect way to show support! A little hug, a little happy, and then a “sweetie give me a call later tonight” is ideal! Just my two cents.

[CMDelta]

I would encourage any interested moms to go for bid WEEKEND (not the whole week) if possible! Even though my Greek and Non-Greek friends thought I was crazy, I had heard it on good authority to come so I convinced a non-Greek mom from my hometown to join me (we live 10 hours away) for the fun of it. We had a ball meeting other moms (some I still keep up with), shopping on the square for Bid Day gifts & trying out several restaurants I had not had the opportunity to try before. Did we see our daughters much? No. Did they stay with us at the hotel? Absolutely Not! Were they excited beyond belief to share their Bid Day with us? Yes. My DD was thrilled that I was able to follow her around and be her personal photographer so she'd have good pictures to post later. Keep in mind though, some sororities don't have anything planned at the house cuz they take the pledges somewhere else. My friend didn't even get to go in her DD's sorority house. Whereas my DD's sorority had food for all of us and gave house tours. I am so glad I was able to be there and am going back this year to be work crew at her sorority house (which is NOT my sorority btw). Lodging is TOUGH (always) but 4 of us moms are renting a house a couple miles away.

[MaryPoppins]

PNMS! Don't forget to register for the C.A.R.E. Walk!
C.A.R.E. Walk Registration Link

And don't forget to go ahead and register for Recruitment!
Ole Miss Fall 2013 Sorority Recruitment Link

[pnm13]

Okay, I have a question, but I'm not sure if it violates what all of you lovely sorority women are allowed to disclose!

Anyways: Does it mean anything (Is it important? Not? Good? Bad?) if the Vice President or President of the sorority personally introduces herself and has small talk with one or two of the PNMs during the water party rounds?

If you can't say, that is fine! I just thought it wouldn't hurt to ask! Thanks.

[Titchou]

It means they are doing their job. That's it - nothing more, nothing less. Would you expect they stand in the corner and stare at everyone? The head of any household holding any event should introduce himself/herself to the guests and thank them for coming.

[WCsweet<3]

Originally Posted by Titchou

It means they are doing their job. That's it - nothing more, nothing less. Would you expect they stand in the corner and stare at everyone? The head of any household holding any event should introduce himself/herself to the guests and thank them for coming.

This. They walk around and get to meet PNMs as well. It doesn't necessarily mean anything, but try to make a good impression just like you would with any sister.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by MU2Driver

Some moms, although well short of most, will go up and book a room for the entire week. I think the "support" in these cases is more for the moms than the DDs. The girls will get the support that they really need from their floor mates who are going through it with them. At this point, the recs are in, the resume is what it is, and all you can really do is pace the floor, drink heavily, and wait for nightly phone updates (all while projecting confidence without transferring your anxiety to her). Moms who are physically present and actually have the DDs stay with them at the hotel do a disservice for several reasons, including: 1) They inevitably want to rehash the day's events, invitations received (and not received), etc. beyond that point which is helpful (usually zero), and 2) The DD may feel like she's going through this alone, or just with mom, when in reality she can be drawing great strength from sharing the experience with the 1200 girls who will be her PanHellenic sisters for her college life.
Be prepared to address her concerns with facts that I'm sure you've already learned from GC, especially as it relates to the fact that she most likely will be released from one or more sororities in which she expressed an interest. This is the rule rather than the exception and it is in no way a reflection of her. If she goes in with an open mind, maximizes choices and realizes that whichever chapter she joins at Ole Miss is most likely one of the best chapters of that sorority in the country, she will do fine.
Bid day is a slightly different matter, and many parents will show up to watch the bid opening and "the run". Unless you have a well-founded fear that your DD is going to have a seriously adverse result, I would let her enjoy what will be a memory for a lifetime w/o her trying to accommodate your presence.
I would encourage you to go to the Texas A&M game on Oct 12. She will be thrilled to show you around the house, visit her sorority's tent at the grove, and meet her new sisters.
Just my two cents.

You are a total ROCK STAR of a mom.

[ElvisLover]

I thought the pnms were required to spend the night in their dorms.

[MU2Driver]

Originally Posted by pnm13

Anyways: Does it mean anything (Is it important? Not? Good? Bad?) if the Vice President or President of the sorority personally introduces herself and has small talk with one or two of the PNMs during the water party rounds?

Concur with the other answers posted. I would also add that it may help you to keep in perspective what the Water Parties are. They are merely initial introductory opportunities for the PNMs and the chapters. It is intended to be a casual, get-acquainted event on both sides, notwithstanding the hectic pace.

The most that the sororities are trying to accomplish at this stage in terms of selection is to generally sort the PNMs that they don't know much about into three basic piles (not of equal size):

1) I can really see this girl as an XYZ. Self explanatory. You may find yourself paired with a strong recruiter later in FR.

2) I would like to know more about this girl to see if she is a fit with XYZ. This is where thetalady's advice is important. The actives know who you are now, and if they see your head buried in a trash can at Rooster's during the next three weeks, expect them to take note. Conversely, if you have a chance to make a positive impression in class or elsewhere, your stock will go up.

3) I don't see this girl as an XYZ. At this stage about the only way that happens is if they learned about a QR or you just completely botched the conversation in a way that makes them think you have no social skills whatsoever. Even that is not unrecoverable at this stage (unless perhaps if it was intentional and they find that out).

As an example, my DD told me yesterday about 1 of her 12 PNMs from Sunday. No eye contact, no responsiveness beyond one word answers and grunts, no questions, no expressions of interest of any kind resulted in a painfully long 20 minutes for my already exhausted DD, and not a very high score for the PNM. There are multiple explanations for this, none of them acceptable. Maybe PNM is a quintuple Ole Miss chapter legacy and a direct descendent of a Founder of ABC, but still. The actives know about these situations and/or that the PNMs are under a lot of pressure, but part of maturity is to hold up your end of the conversational bargain anyway. As Dr. Sheldon Cooper (TBBT) might say, "It's a non-optional social convention."

So, if the President or the VP (or any other member) engaged you in conversation, and you responded with something approaching a complete sentence containing a coherent thought, my DD would say, "Yay you!". That's all you needed to accomplish for the day. Hotty Toddy!

[MaryPoppins]

Everything MU2Driver said but especially this:

Originally Posted by MU2Driver

No eye contact, no responsiveness beyond one word answers and grunts, no questions, no expressions of interest of any kind resulted in a painfully long 20 minutes for my already exhausted DD, and not a very high score for the PNM. There are multiple explanations for this, none of them acceptable. Maybe she is a quintuple Ole Miss chapter legacy and a direct descendent of a Founder of ABC, but still. The actives know about these situations and/or that the PNMs are under a lot of pressure, but part of maturity is to hold up your end of the conversational bargain anyway. As Dr. Sheldon Cooper (TBBT) might say, "It's a non-optional social convention."

All PNMs need to know that the Ole Miss Chapters share this information with each other. Don't even begin to think that being rude to one or more chapters will be kept under wraps. The actives have three weeks to share all sorts if information with all of their friends in the other houses. There is absolutely no excuse for being rude as a guest in someone's home, unless of course you are in an ICU bed or under very strong sedating medication. Then, and just then, it might be excusable.

Frankly, if your are rude to me, well then you've just told me more about your family than I personally care to know.

[OldOleMiss]

^^^ What MaryPoppins Said^^^ a MILLION TIMES ^^^What MaryPoppins Said^^^ Despite the large pledge classes and seemingly "big size" of chapters- Ole Miss is NOT a big school... and, at least in my day, we all talked to each other! My Sophomore year I lived with one of my best friends from freshman year, she was in a different sorority than I was. A girl came through Coke Party (what is now I guess philanthropy)- and I had the "pleasure" of rushing her. She was beyond blatantly rude to me and my house and told me that she was a double legacy at my roommates house and was definitely planning on pledging there Well, you guessed it- not only did we release her but I shared it all with my roommate that night as we lay exhausted in our beds... who couldn't wait to tell her "real sister"- who yes was in a third different house-- well guess who was not invited back to the house she PLANNED ON pledging? (nor any other house after skit round?). The thing about Ole Miss is every third girl you meet is a double legacy at one house or another, was homecoming queen, 4.0, etc... the houses, more often than not, are looking for more of a reason to release you than to keep you. Rudeness gets around just as quick as a bad rep or "uncouth" behavior... you never know who is living with who, who is related to who, etc... etc...

[ElvisLover]

^^This! My advice to any and all pnms at Ole Miss is to act like every house you visit is the house you want to pledge. You have a better chance of being invited back that way and, if you are foolish enough to buy into the perceived "top tier" tent talk, there's just not enough room in those houses for every girl coming through rush. You should consider yourself fortunate to get a bid anywhere on that campus. Your sorority membership is for a lifetime, not just four years of college.

[ElvisLover]

And to add to what OldOleMiss stated, think about how much faster "word" travels via text messaging now between actives in different houses. The next house a pnm visits might already have your rudeness and disinterest at your previous house QFP'd!

[magnoliacurious]

Midnight last night, as many of you know, was the deadline to sign up for recruitment. Anybody know the final number signed up at Ole Miss?

[pnm13]

Wow! Thank you all so much for the wonderful feedback and advice! Clearly, I am over-analyzing everything, just giving myself something to do while the wait continues I guess! But, I absolutely loved water parties. All of the girls I talked with were so nice, and it was also neat because a lot of the sophomore girls were just as nervous as us PNMs! Knowing this, I did my best to not only answer the questions fully, but I asked the actives lots of questions about themselves, too! It was so so fun to get a glimpse into all of these girls lives. Now, only time will tell.....the wait continues.