Schools where you absolutely positively need recs

[Titchou]

I can't count the number of times I've told a PNM we already had a form on her! Strong alum groups work their high schools and send in forms on the women without their knowledge. It goes on everywhere. You cannot guarantee that there was no form on your daughter or any of her friends. If a group requires one, they'll get it. One way or another - and without your knowledge.

[thetalady]

Originally Posted by Titchou

I can't count the number of times I've told a PNM we already had a form on her! Strong alum groups work their high schools and send in forms on the women without their knowledge. It goes on everywhere. You cannot guarantee that there was no form on your daughter or any of her friends. If a group requires one, they'll get it. One way or another - and without your knowledge.

^^^^^^ ABSOLUTELY TRUE!!!

Please, please, Armywife, please believe us when we tell you this!

And I have written those rec letters from resumes and a conversation with the PNM that you dislike so much. I am not crazy about them either. I would much rather know the young lady personally, but sometimes, you just have to do what you have to do to help a PNM and trust your gut.

[justgo_withit]

Originally Posted by thetalady

I would much rather know the young lady personally, but sometimes, you just have to do what you have to do to help a PNM and trust your gut.

(coming from a school where we wouldn't have even known what to do with a rec so I might be totally off base)

Isn't it also that at these SWYAPNR a rec is often used as a box to check, not necessarily "an alumna says this PNM is a nice girl BID HER IMMEDIATELY"? Not only are you trusting your gut, but you've got however many actives also evaluating her membership potential, so rec ≠ bid by any means. From reading here it seems like recs indicate mostly that a PNM has her stuff together enough to plan this in advance and get it done, then followed by if she has any strong connection to the sorority, or specifically an alumna from that chapter, etc. I hope this makes sense, I need to go to bed! Haha

Additionally, I feel like the schools where a rec would be unusual and give a PNM any sort of special boost are not the schools where PNMs will be hitting up strangers for recs anyway.

[LadyLonghorn]

Originally Posted by justgo_withit

(coming from a school where we wouldn't have even known what to do with a rec so I might be totally off base)

Isn't it also that at these SWYAPNR a rec is often used as a box to check, not necessarily "an alumna says this PNM is a nice girl BID HER IMMEDIATELY"? Not only are you trusting your gut, but you've got however many actives also evaluating her membership potential, so rec ≠ bid by any means. From reading here it seems like recs indicate mostly that a PNM has her stuff together enough to plan this in advance and get it done, then followed by if she has any strong connection to the sorority, or specifically an alumna from that chapter, etc. I hope this makes sense, I need to go to bed! Haha

Additionally, I feel like the schools where a rec would be unusual and give a PNM any sort of special boost are not the schools where PNMs will be hitting up strangers for recs anyway.

Recs play a more important role. They provide information about a PNM much earlier than when the recruitment registrations come in. The sooner chapters can get to know a PNM before recruitment, the better her chances of getting a second look. It also gives chapters the opportunity to pair the PNM with the best sister for her in that round, one who will have a lot in common with her and make a good impression as well as be able to have a conversation about familiar things and common interests that should make the PNM a little more relaxed. This is especially important in highly competitive recruitments where the first round is only a few minutes long and the strongest chapters may need to cut half the PNM pool after the first round.

[Hartofsec]

Originally Posted by justgo_withit

Isn't it also that at these SWYAPNR a rec is often used as a box to check, not necessarily "an alumna says this PNM is a nice girl BID HER IMMEDIATELY"? Not only are you trusting your gut, but you've got however many actives also evaluating her membership potential, so rec ≠ bid by any means.

A rec certainly doesn't equal a bid, but at some schools (speaking for my own school, anyway), it may very well make the difference in receiving an invitation to the next round.

Most rec forms include info regarding whether or not the alum personally knows the girl, her family, and for how long, etc. Though even if the rec is an "info only" type sent by an alum who does not personally know the PNM, it is still advantageous to have this info arrive in advance of rush.

[Titchou]

Originally Posted by thetalady

^^^^^^ ABSOLUTELY TRUE!!!

Please, please, Armywife, please believe us when we tell you this!

And I have written those rec letters from resumes and a conversation with the PNM that you dislike so much. I am not crazy about them either. I would much rather know the young lady personally, but sometimes, you just have to do what you have to do to help a PNM and trust your gut.

True - and those of us who write a lot of recs know "how" to write one - if you get my drift.

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by Titchou

True - and those of us who write a lot of recs know "how" to write one - if you get my drift.

My org's form specifically asks questions to this effect, so I'd bet others do as well.

[Zillini]

Originally Posted by Titchou

I can't count the number of times I've told a PNM we already had a form on her! Strong alum groups work their high schools and send in forms on the women without their knowledge. It goes on everywhere. You cannot guarantee that there was no form on your daughter or any of her friends. If a group requires one, they'll get it. One way or another - and without your knowledge.

I've also seen examples where Annie Active's rush crush doesn't have a Rec and so Annie scrambles to get her one. Annie calls alumnae she knows, asks other actives from the PNM's hometown if they know alumnae who might know the PNM, searches through the alumnae directory in that hometown, etc. I doubt those PNMs ever knew they suddenly had a Rec submitted on their behalf.

[GeorgiaGreek]

Originally Posted by Zillini

I've also seen examples where Annie Active's rush crush doesn't have a Rec and so Annie scrambles to get her one. Annie calls alumnae she knows, asks other actives from the PNM's hometown if they know alumnae who might know the PNM, searches through the alumnae directory in that hometown, etc. I doubt those PNMs ever knew they suddenly had a Rec submitted on their behalf.

An active who gets a rec for a PNM may also not tell a PNM this during recruitment because they don't want to 1. make them feel bad/imply they aren't wanted just for not having one and/or 2. make them think they will be guaranteed a spot in the house because an active likes them enough to find a rec. Active Annie might not have that much say in it, or PNM might end up too low on the bid list to be matched to XYZ, etc.

[Titchou]

Originally Posted by Zillini

I've also seen examples where Annie Active's rush crush doesn't have a Rec and so Annie scrambles to get her one. Annie calls alumnae she knows, asks other actives from the PNM's hometown if they know alumnae who might know the PNM, searches through the alumnae directory in that hometown, etc. I doubt those PNMs ever knew they suddenly had a Rec submitted on their behalf.

Love those late night calls!