The Monogamy Gap

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by Munchkin03

I've been seeing so much of this. Most of the people I know from HS who got married without going to college, or even living on their own, are divorced. Most were divorced by the time they were 25. There's a lot to be said for exploring the outside world and making sure you don't miss out on a lot of awesome experiences and people.

It's been my experience that women succumb to the early marriage pressure more than men do, and they're the ones who end up wondering what they missed out on and experimenting.

Then they end up being 25/26/27 and sort of "socially stunted" if you will, because they didn't get to do what most of us were doing at 19/20/21, and are trying to do it now.

Example: A girl I went to HS with got married at 19 and had a kid. She got divorced recently at 26.

Her Facebook is all "OMMGGGGG kegstands/kissing randoms/jello shotz" with her 21 year old co-workers.

Why? Because she missed out the no responsibilities partying time that my friends and I have already had at 20. While we were having fun, she was being a parent. So she's trying to live that now, with an 8 year old kid. And it's tacky.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

Then they end up being 25/26/27 and sort of "socially stunted" if you will, because they didn't get to do what most of us were doing at 19/20/21, and are trying to do it now.

Example: A girl I went to HS with got married at 19 and had a kid. She got divorced recently at 26.

Her Facebook is all "OMMGGGGG kegstands/kissing randoms/jello shotz" with her 21 year old co-workers.

Why? Because she missed out the no responsibilities partying time that my friends and I have already had at 20. While we were having fun, she was being a parent. So she's trying to live that now, with an 8 year old kid. And it's tacky.

Fun doesn't end when you have kids. I know happily married parents that do these things occasionally (except the kissing randoms). If she wants to go out and do those things, and does them with people who keep her safe, fine - better that she gets her yayas out than sits at home resenting her child. I find people who desert longtime friends and make their husbands a distant #2 after they have children far "tackier."