Rushing with an Open Mind (a belated Spring 2012 recruitment story)

[greeknewbie]

ROUND TWO:

I arrived at our meeting room, and was given a schedule for my day. I’m not going to lie, I wanted to cry when I saw that both Harper’s Bazaar and Nylon had cut me. I thought things had gone really well at both parties, so to think that they would cut me meant I had done something wrong? Maybe? I wasn’t sure. But I was also really lucky: I’m not someone who has always had a good time getting to know people, especially on a first-impressions basis like it seemed like recruitment was, so to think that I had a full schedule (all five other sororities had wanted to see me again) was definitely something that made me feel a little bit better. Some of my friends had gotten full schedules, some had been cut by one or two, and there were a fair amount of people who for some reason had only been invited back to one house. It was heartbreaking to see how upset those girls were, but most of them pulled themselves back together and promised to continue to go through recruitment. A few did, however, drop today after only getting invited back to one or two that they felt they would not like and by dropping out, were eligible for fall informal recruitment or rerush again in the following spring.

I don’t have my actual schedule, and I’m pretty sure I had a break at some point because I had the first and last slots for parties, but I do have the order I went in.

Vogue was first, much to my initial disappointment. I was extremely surprised to see this house on my schedule, because I had not had a good time at that party and thought the feeling was mutual. However, they completely changed my mind today. Their theme was beautiful and their skit was extremely well-done and very fun. I only spoke to two girls today, and they were both really easy to talk to and I totally enjoyed myself. Also, the one girl who I did have a good conversation with the first day made a point to stop by and give me a hug and say she was happy to see me back. I left knowing that this house was going to move way up in my rankings at the end of the day.

Up next was Marie Claire, and I was excited to be back. This had been my favorite of all the houses I had been invited back to, so I was really happy to be there. I know I commented a lot on the decorations the day before, and they continued with their classiness today. However, the first two girls I spoke to, the conversations were very awkward and stilted and I was not having nearly as good of a time as I did the first day. The skit was kind of sloppy compared to the one I had just seen, but they were obviously having a good time doing it. The third girl I spoke to, who had just been in the skit, totally saved the day from me. I felt an instant connection to her and was genuinely sorry to have to stop talking to her when we had to leave. They were probably going to move down in my rankings, but luckily the last girl had made it totally worthwhile.

InStyle came next, and their party was fine but nothing special. I didn’t have a crazy connection to the girls I spoke to, and while their skit was adorable it wasn’t anything exciting or new. I really just don’t have a lot to say about this chapter, sorry (though you might like it after my excessive descriptions of others, I wrote a lot in my recruitment book and I tend to have a pretty good memory).

After InStyle came Glamour. This party was very memorable because one, it was in a very dark room and two, we stood up the entire time instead of sitting like at other parties (though now that I think about it, Vogue had everyone stand too). But it was just pairs standing around the room, so it was kind of weird. Their skit was a total and complete mess, but they were silly and definitely having fun, though I have the feeling they did not volunteer to be in it and therefore were a lot less into it than other girls at other chapters. I absolutely loved one of the girls I spoke to, and we had a really good time talking about shared backgrounds. I was sorry to leave our conversation as well.

Last but certainly not least was ELLE. Their room blew me away. It was so intricately decorated and it was obvious that they had spent a ton of time making sure the room was gorgeous and each table had a unique setting that still went with the overall theme. I spoke to a few girls, one of who shared my love for theatre, and had to actually leave in the middle of our conversation to go perform in their skit. And their skit was incredible. It was by far the best I had seen yet and they were all extremely talented, plus you could tell how much each girl had wanted to be in the skit and loved performing in it. I left and knew that I would be ranking it as my number one.

For preferences day, we could attend up to three parties. After a lot of hemming and hawing, I eventually decided to rank:

1. ELLE
1. Marie Claire
1. Vogue
2. Glamour
3. InStyle

I ended up doing this because I had really liked Vogue that day and was confused by how different my opinions of them had been. So I decided that I would rank them third because I wanted to give them another chance to give me a chance so I could make an educated final decision. What rush was teaching me so far was that you really couldn’t just rely on first impressions, and that recruitment was an incredibly crazy experience. I went to bed hoping that things were going to work out the next day.

[greeknewbie]

ROUND THREE:

When I arrived at the meeting place for preferences day, I was once again extremely blessed to have a full schedule. ELLE, Marie Claire, and Glamour had cordially invited me back to their preferences parties. I wasn’t too sad to see the loss of Vogue, because it just meant that that house was not for me. I’d been trying to go through the recruitment process with the idea of “you’ll end up where you’re meant to be”, which is also how I went through my college application process. That had worked out wonderfully, so now I was hoping the same would happen here.

Glamour was up first. You could tell today was going to be more serious because, rather than cheering our arrival, the sisters were serenading us as we were led in. I was picked up by the girl I loved from the previous day and was so excited to see her again. We had a genuine conversation, just about our lives (including our dogs, which was a huge bonding point because I consider my dog like my child). She was the only person I spoke to at that party, which meant a lot, mostly because to me it meant that she had seriously just wanted to talk to me, and it made me honestly feel really special. The actual preferences ceremony was beautiful, some letters were read to seniors, some songs were sung, and then I signed their preferences book to show I had attended the ceremony and did a smaller ritual with the girl who preffed me. I left with a really great feeling, knowing I could totally picture myself in this sorority if every girl was like this one.

Marie Claire came after, and I was picked up once again by the girl I had loved the day before. The sisters were all dressed in really unique outfits, but they went with the theme of their sorority so it wasn’t weird it was honestly quite beautiful. The first girl and I were having a really good conversation, and two girls who I had spoken to during the first round came to tell me how happy they were that I was back for preferences and they had been looking forward to seeing me again. One of those girls then took the place of my first rusher to show me some photos about her life so far in the sorority and how much it meant to her. They were so sweet, and you could tell that she truly loved her sisters, her pledge family, and everything about her experience in Greek Life. She was also the one who led me through the preferences ceremony. A senior spoke about how the sorority had been there for her, in good times and bad, and then we were shown photos about the sorority as they all sang a song about choosing their sorority. I’m probably not doing this ceremony enough justice, because it was beautiful. I was nearly in tears by the end of it (one of the two who were getting super emotional) and just had that moment like the one I had when I was college hunting: I knew I had found my home. When I left this party, the girl who had just preffed me hugged me goodbye and I hugged her back because I just didn’t want to let go.

But I still had one more party to attend, which was ELLE. This had been my number one choice the day before, so I was interested to see how it would compare to the extremely emotional experience I had just had. I was completely surprised to be picked up by a girl I did not remember at all, and whom I could tell right from the start I had no connection with. She asked me if I had any questions about the sorority, and past that didn’t really have anything to say. It was so completely awkward, I had no idea what to do. My first two preference parties had been so wonderful that I was just confused as to how a chapter I had loved the two days had suddenly become one where I felt extremely uncomfortable in. I spoke to one other girl, but she didn’t really leave an impression on me. For the actual ceremony, the sisters took turns reading part of their sorority’s creed, and while the words themselves were beautiful, I had no connection to them either. While I knew that this house would end up with a wonderful group of people, I knew in my heart that it wasn’t for me.

As soon as I got back to the meeting area, I ran to one of my gamma chis because I wanted to do my rankings before I started questioning my feelings. She was a little surprised, because I was definitely someone who had needed to talk things out in previous days, but as soon as she had finished talking to the girl she was working with, let me come over again to do my rankings.

My final card went:

1. Marie Claire
2. Glamour
3. ELLE

And then it was time to go back to my room and freak out.

[greeknewbie]

BID DAY

I woke up extremely early from a dream where the only thing I could remember was people singing the ELLE song and I was getting extremely anxious. Had I messed up at Marie Claire somehow, and then at Glamour? I was sure I was going to be happy and lucky to be invited to be a member of any of the houses I had preffed at, but I had been so sure that Marie Claire and I were meant for each other that the thought that they could have not felt the same way was really painful. Luckily, I didn’t get a call to let me know that I had not received a bid, so I waited anxiously for my gamma chis to come around and give me my bid. I basically spent the entire morning pacing my room and watching from my window as girls in gamma chi jackets walked all around the dorms with bags of different colors representing each sorority. I couldn’t figure out which one was for Marie Claire, but one of the ones I had narrowed it down to was still in my gamma chis’ hands as I finally spotted them from my window heading towards my dorm room.

At this point, I was freaking out. But I didn’t have to wait much longer. A lot of girls in my building were in my gamma chi group, but they moved quickly. I finally heard a knock on my door and opened it to find my gamma chis there waiting for me. And when they started cheering the sorority’s song, I started grinning uncontrollably. They handed me my bag and bid card, which I had to refrain from ripping open.

I was invited to become a new member at Marie Claire!





On a shield of white…




An anchor bright…



For every girl that pledges right...


There'll be nothing but DEEGEE for the one that I love!


I was a proud new member of Delta Gamma!

Turns out my gamma chis were members of Nylon and Glamour respectively (neither of which I guessed) and two of my really good friends here also went DG with me. I ended up knowing a lot of my pledge class tangentially, but I love them all to pieces now and we’re incredibly close.

As I finish up my first semester as a member of my sorority, I could not be happier. DG has filled a hole in my life I didn’t realize I had. These are some of the most amazing women I have met in my entire life, and they have definitely helped change me for the better. I’m looking so forward to recruitment next year so I can show all those people who were just like me, especially those who are unsure if greek life is for them, that Greek Life is honestly nothing like the movies. Sure, there are mixers and formals and whatever, but there’s so much more. There’s a philanthropy that I love to do service for. A pledge family I love. And girls who I know would have my back no matter what.

So to anyone that reads this as a PNM: keep an open mind and an open heart. You’d be surprised how much your opinions change throughout recruitment, and how much Greek life can change you for the better. Looking back, I don’t know what I would do without my sisters. They are the best part of my college experience so far, and I honestly wish everyone the best on their future recruitments, on both sides of the equation. You’ll end up where you are meant to be, trust in the system. Because in all honesty, at least in my experience, it works. It really does.