Gay alumni

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by DTD Alum

a Jewish person is not going to be met with a comment like, "I mean jeez, enough already, we get she's Jewish, why doesn't she shut up about it" by simply saying, "Oh, sorry I'm late, synagogue went a little late,"

I disagree. I've gotten precisely that reaction for having the nerve to call my department's Christmas party a holiday party instead.

You can parse minor differences all you want, in how one's minority status may or may not make itself known, but I don't think there is any group that doesn't have to think about what they do/do not say in interactions with the majority group. If you don't have to think about it, that is a privilege. That is all I mean to point out.

[shirley1929]

I have to say, I love this conversation!

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Do you think he would walk into the meetings/gatherings and automatically say "hello, I am homosexual....?" Perhaps he would say something that heterosexuals say all of the time "my life partner/or significant other/or boyfriend/or husband, Tom, and I went to an awesome new restaurant today..." and that is how the "announcement" would happen.

I was just about to get more specific and ask what he meant by:

Originally Posted by midwest00alum

do I be upfront and let people know I'm gay right when I meet them, or do I just let that fact be known to people subtly as I get to know them?

But then I realized he said this in his 2nd post:

Originally Posted by midwest00alum

Front-loading people about it could make for one awkward moment, but at least I'd have the chance to plan what to say, and I'd find out a lot about their receptivity, and we'd get all those difficult conversations over with, and the air would be clear when all of that is done. That's sort of the proactive way of doing it.

So yes, I felt like he was building up to a sort of proclamation. Do I think it's necessary? No, but if it helps him comfortable right off the bat, then great.

[knight_shadow]

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

I disagree. I've gotten precisely that reaction for having the nerve to call my department's Christmas party a holiday party instead.

You can parse minor differences all you want, in how one's minority status may or may not make itself known, but I don't think there is any group that doesn't have to think about what they do/do not say in interactions with the majority group. If you don't have to think about it, that is a privilege. That is all I mean to point out.

What does an African American person have to hold back on when interacting with a group? Sorry, guys, I was out being black so I'm running late?

Yes, groups get discriminated against, but like DTD Alum said, all situations don't boil down to "insert minority group here."