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My phone rang at exactly 7:30am Arkansas time. My heart sunk because Lindsey shouldn't have access to her phone unless she was released. She sounded shaky and then started crying. She got invited back to three chapters out of a possible four. Her schedule for House Tours is Risky Businesstoday; Ferris Bueller’s Day OffandWeird Sciencetomorrow.She got to go back to her dorm and use her phone because her party today is later in the afternoon, which is a huge blessing considering how upset she was.
So why was she crying? When people say recruitment is a roller coaster ride, they aren’t kidding! She had been so pleasantly surprised by all the great groups who had invited her to the second round. Now reality had set in and she realized she wasn’t the only one choosing. I tried to convince her that there are so many possible reasons she was cut other than that the girls “didn’t like her.” Those more selective groups could have tons of legacies, friends from high school, class presidents, cheerleading captains, girls with high GPA’s (Lindsey’s is only mediocre), etc. But try telling that to an eighteen year old who just had her heart ripped out.
When I asked her why she isn’t excited that her number one choice, Risky Business, had invited her back she said, “Because now I’m sure that they are just going to cut me too.” Logic, anybody? She is afraid to risk more hope on a process that she realizes she doesn’t have too much control over. I begged her to take the risk and not drop out. After she cried some more while I kept trying to focus on the good news, she agreed to stay with it for now.
The biggest negative for Lindsey is that after House Tours she will have to wait seven long days to find out if she got invited to Pref. She said she’s worried about being distracted in class all week and not sleeping. I really don’t like Arkansas’ schedule. I haven’t heard of other two week recruitment periods. Are there a lot of schools who do it this way?
I repeated all the great GC advice I had read: Keep an open mind. You are only half way through the four rounds. The two groups you don’t think you like could really shine during House Tours and Pref. You may meet some different girls that give you a whole new perspective. Do you really think out of three to four hundred girls in any sorority that you couldn’t find three to five best friends?
I expect some negative comments from GCers regarding my daughter’s reaction. Is she being a spoiled baby who wanted a perfect rush? Yes! Is she being ungrateful for what she has, which is an almost full schedule with three great groups left on it? Yes! Please remember, she is tired, stressed, far away from her family for the first time, and lacks perspective due in part to being only eighteen years old. Please pray for her and that after the nap she was about to take, she will have a whole new attitude. Thank you!
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