Auburn Recruitment 2011 - 17 jewels!

[shirley1929]

Originally Posted by violetpretty

Yeah, but 99% of the people in the above situation simply think they are too good for certain chapters, though they use euphemisms like "I don't fit" and "I didn't feel a connection". I'm sure this woman could have been happy in one of those two chapters, if she wanted to be happy in one of them.

Where do you get your statistics on this 99%? Sorry to snark, but there's a poster (can't remember who) who gets very hung up on stats and where they came from...

I really see both sides on this and know that there are probably many PNM's who feel "above" certain chapters, but there are some that just don't "feel right" being in certain chapters. We should not blame them for taking a bid away from another woman who might really love that house. So instead we snark at the PNM, and I personally don't like that. They're told to "go out and find your home" in formal recruitment, and they didn't. Pat them on the back and tell them your sorry, and move on. Maybe she could have been happy in that house, or maybe she would have made a bad decision that locked her to that bid for an entire year. Who knows? But we do know we can't change it now with our snarky advice.

But why then, don't we snark about our own NPC organizations when the MUTUAL SELECTION process fails a perfectly wonderful PNM who is dropped from the system completely? We don't, because God forbid, we say something terrible about the system that we are a part of already...

[BraveMaroon]

Originally Posted by shirley1929

But why then, don't we snark about our own NPC organizations when the MUTUAL SELECTION process fails a perfectly wonderful PNM who is dropped from the system completely? We don't, because God forbid, we say something terrible about the system that we are a part of already...

I think we're all reasonable enough to point out that the system isn't perfect on either side.

When you have that volume of people being shuffled in and out over a short period of time, both sides of the equation are going to make snap decisions which may or may not be rational, grounded in fact, etc. If we were to give every single person the thorough vetting, "rush" would last 3 months.

The difference, in my opinion is that the sororities have been participating in rush for years, so they likely have more practice at making quick decisions with better end results.

I'm not saying that you should 'settle' for anything, but what are the odds that in two 100+ member organizations, any young woman couldn't/wouldn't find her niche?

[shirley1929]

Originally Posted by BraveMaroon

I think we're all reasonable enough to point out that the system isn't perfect on either side.

When you have that volume of people being shuffled in and out over a short period of time, both sides of the equation are going to make snap decisions which may or may not be rational, grounded in fact, etc. If we were to give every single person the thorough vetting, "rush" would last 3 months.

The difference, in my opinion is that the sororities have been participating in rush for years, so they likely have more practice at making quick decisions with better end results.

I'm not saying that you should 'settle' for anything, but what are the odds that in two 100+ member organizations, any young woman couldn't/wouldn't find her niche?

I agree with most of this, but does the bold part give us license to snark at them like we have a superiority complex or something?

These 19-22 year old women are doing formal recruitment for (on average) 3 times total (soph, jr, sr year). Yes, there are advisors, yes, the wheel isn't invented over and over again, BUT they're still young and making rash decisions like the PNM's.

The system isn't perfect. I just hate seeing people kicked and snarked at when they're down. Furthermore, finding a "niche" is far different than finding a "home". They're 18 years old and under the impression they're looking for a "home".

[violetpretty]

Originally Posted by shirley1929

I agree with most of this, but does the bold part give us license to snark at them like we have a superiority complex or something?

Stop acting like you're above it. See below.

Originally Posted by shirley1929

Where do you get your statistics on this 99%? Sorry to snark, but there's a poster (can't remember who) who gets very hung up on stats and where they came from...

[shirley1929]

Originally Posted by violetpretty

Stop acting like you're above it. See below.

And I apologized for it! But the fact of the matter is, there really is a poster who will challenge you on where statistics come from, so if you throw it out there, you should be willing to back up the claim. Otherwise it's just nonsense.

I also wasn't snarking and beating down someone who is already LOW and SAD. That would be referred to as BULLYING. Which takes me back to my original point - can we just be a little nicer? I know that there those who feel "above" certain houses, but some just don't feel the "connection" we tell them to look for. Let's quit kicking people when they're already down.

[violetpretty]

Originally Posted by shirley1929

And I apologized for it! But the fact of the matter is, there really is a poster who will challenge you on where statistics come from, so if you throw it out there, you should be willing to back up the claim. Otherwise it's just nonsense.

If you were actually "sorry", you wouldn't have said anything. It's like saying, "No offense, but..." Whatever. Substitute "99%" for "pretty much everyone".

I don't think it's bullying by pointing out that the woman in question does not have to be sad and calling out what is almost certainly her/her daughter's true feelings.