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I've seen it, close up. Here's how it happens. A rushee has a friend in the fraternity who goes to the rush chairman. He explains that the rushee pledged and was initiated into another fraternity on another campus. He doesn't know anyone on this campus and wants to know if there's any way he can join the house he wants. The rush chairman agrees as long as everyone keeps their mouths shut. The decision is that its best for the chapter and best for the rushee. There is no 'Panhellenic Love' among fraternities.
As far as member groups of one fraternity joining another, it's not as uncommon as you may think. Alpha Delt has been very opportunistic when they see a chapter in trouble. When SAE got kicked off at Duke the entire alumni body was initiated into ADPhi. That caused some problems when SAE came back. At FSU, the TEPs petitioned IFC to allow them to become a chapter of ADPhi, which is what happened.
I know alumni of one fraternity who were infuriated at the way their chapter had been kicked off. They petitioned to become members of their biggest rival, the fraternity that ended up buying the suspended fraternity's house. It was negotiated but was never realized.
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