Dating dilemma/question

[33girl]

If a man WAS talking about commitment after not even a month, I'd run fast and far.

People just want to take things too quickly these days. Just keep the relationship semi casual (i.e. don't sleep with him) and give it a little time, and don't over analyze everything he says.

On the other hand, if he seems actually untrustworthy (i.e. you think he's lying about things) then that's another matter.

[Munchkin03]

Originally Posted by 33girl

If a man WAS talking about commitment after not even a month, I'd run fast and far.

People just want to take things too quickly these days. Just keep the relationship semi casual (i.e. don't sleep with him) and give it a little time, and don't over analyze everything he says.

On the other hand, if he seems actually untrustworthy (i.e. you think he's lying about things) then that's another matter.

I'd suggest dating a few more guys to see how you feel. It's easy to think a guy's the only game in town when he's the only one you're going on dates with.

[cheerfulgreek]

This is SO not a date, yet. I mean, I wouldn't call it a date because nothing has been carved in stone. This is more like you going out to see if you like each other, nothing more, nothing less. You have way too much data to collect before you even decide if you like him. What you see is not necessarily what you get, so leave your heart at home. It's way too early.

[christiangirl]

Originally Posted by 33girl

If a man WAS talking about commitment after not even a month, I'd run fast and far.

People just want to take things too quickly these days. Just keep the relationship semi casual (i.e. don't sleep with him) and give it a little time, and don't over analyze everything he says.

On the other hand, if he seems actually untrustworthy (i.e. you think he's lying about things) then that's another matter.

That. Allat. My red flag was "something you don't trust about him" but I'd have to know more about what the OP meant by that.



If you're getting vibes that he's not ready for a commit yet down for a long-term relationship, then maybe you should ask (yourself) if you're sensing that he's not ready for a commitment or just not ready to commit to you. The former talks about where he is in life and it may not be where you are (or it might be--have you asked yourself if you really want and are ready for a commitment right now?). The latter, however, would be right on par with where you guys are--3 weeks is way early for a commitment IMO and he may just be showing you he knows that. If you wanna know where his head is at, ask him what he thinks about relationships and what he's looking for. This is WAY different than "How do you feel about me?" or "Where do you see us going?" I wouldn't touch those with a 10 foot pole. But I think it's perfectly acceptable to talk about what he thinks a relationship is, what does he value in one, etc. Even as just a friend, it's good to know that because not all relationships are romantic. You two are getting to know each other so get his views on friendships and family, too.