Help from the Kappas. He found out, and I hope I don't get cut.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by Tre 1

When you say staying in you don't think I'll get cut, do you? Do you think the other brothers know? I know he knows. I'm thinking I should just go with the flow.

I don't understand your question.

If you don't get cut and it becomes obvious he is uncomfortable around you, it might be good to go ahead and talk about it. If you do, this is a hard lesson learned. Henceforth, be careful who you have sex with.

[Tre 1]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

If you don't get cut and it becomes obvious he is uncomfortable around you, it might be good to go ahead and talk about it. If you do, this is a hard lesson learned. Henceforth, be careful who you have sex with.

So you think I should just approach him on it?

[excelblue]

Yes, you should approach him and talk about it in person. How he reacts is up to him.

In either case, you're going to need to get this worked out and over with if you ever want to become one of their brothers. I just don't think any sane person will let you cross into any GLO if you have unresolved issues that might separate you from the brotherhood.

[Tre 1]

Originally Posted by excelblue

Yes, you should approach him and talk about it in person. How he reacts is up to him.

In either case, you're going to need to get this worked out and over with if you ever want to become one of their brothers. I just don't think any sane person will let you cross into any GLO if you have unresolved issues that might separate you from the brotherhood.

If I tell him and I don't deny it, then they'll cut me and I'll never be a Kappa, at least not at this chapter. Going grad would be fine, but I really want the college greek life experience.

On the other hand, you may be right. I would feel better if I came clean, the problem is I would just be risking something I've always wanted since I was in Kappa League.

[PrettyBoy]

Originally Posted by Tre 1

If I tell him and I don't deny it, then they'll cut me and I'll never be a Kappa, at least not at this chapter. Going grad would be fine, but I really want the college greek life experience.
.

LOL, you remind me of those trifling dudes who don't have a problem screwing, but as soon as she comes up pregnant, then you don't want to accept responsibility. You weren't thinking anything about "Kappa" while you were in between those thighs. And why would we want to "help" you? You picked a horrible title for this lame thread.

You're probably a troll anyway.

[ThetaPrincess24]

Originally Posted by Tre 1

If I tell him and I don't deny it, then they'll cut me and I'll never be a Kappa, at least not at this chapter. Going grad would be fine, but I really want the college greek life experience.

On the other hand, you may be right. I would feel better if I came clean, the problem is I would just be risking something I've always wanted since I was in Kappa League.

You should have thought about that before taking your penis out of your pants and just said NO!

[TPA85]

Originally Posted by ThetaPrincess24

You should have thought about that before taking your penis out of your pants and just said NO!

Win.

[dreamseeker]

Originally Posted by PrettyBoy

You weren't thinking anything about "Kappa" while you were in between those thighs.

lol!

[aephi alum]

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

Clearly, the best solution is to transfer to another university, pledge Kappa there, then once you are initiated, you can transfer back to this school and be a Kappa brother.

Originally Posted by ThetaPrincess24

You should have thought about that before taking your penis out of your pants and just said NO!

This is why GC needs a "like" button.

[EE-BO]

Originally Posted by Tre 1

If I tell him and I don't deny it, then they'll cut me and I'll never be a Kappa, at least not at this chapter. Going grad would be fine, but I really want the college greek life experience.

On the other hand, you may be right. I would feel better if I came clean, the problem is I would just be risking something I've always wanted since I was in Kappa League.

I am from an NIC fraternity, and I am aware that intake procedures are very different for NPHC organizations- but I think this particular situation transcends those differences.

First off, given that this is a personal matter- the specific chapter you aspire to and the member with whom you now have a conflict is going to determine the outcome. Therefore, in terms of "giving odds"- this is one case where it is practically impossible for a stranger to the situation to help.

However, I will say this- I really do think you need to take the advice of some other posters and have a very honest and open conversation with that member.

The situation you find yourself in is not unique to the fact you are trying to join the fraternity of the other guy in this triangle. Between friends, in the workplace or in any social grouping- being that guy who cheated with someone's girlfriend or wife is going to put you in a very difficult position. This is all the more true if you are newer to that same workplace/social environment than the guy whose territory you have invaded because what you have done can also be perceived as an invasion against the entire social group the two of you have in common, or may have in common in the future.

I have, both in my fraternity and in many other settings, seen this kind of situation evolve many times. Sometimes it is two guys who just like the same girl, and once it involved a woman who has been married to her husband for several years. Usually it is somewhere in the middle.

Generally, I find most people are very reluctant to get involved in such matters because they are personal. Part of it is surely not wanting to try and get a co-worker fired or ostracize a fellow member of a group because they themselves might one day end up part of a similar story and would prefer the world just butt out. Also, people will tend to look at the big picture when picking sides or deciding to leave a situation alone. There is a big difference between bedding a man's otherwise faithful wife versus a man's girlfriend who is known to sleep around a lot.

Anyhow- that my general life take on the matter.

As for you specifically- getting this out in the open and resolving it now is your best bet. If doing that now really is going to keep you from becoming a Kappa- then it is going to come up later when you have already invested yourself in the chapter as a pledge anyway and the cost of your transgression could be much higher in many ways.

[Tre 1]

Originally Posted by EE-BO

I am from an NIC fraternity, and I am aware that intake procedures are very different for NPHC organizations- but I think this particular situation transcends those differences.

First off, given that this is a personal matter- the specific chapter you aspire to and the member with whom you now have a conflict is going to determine the outcome. Therefore, in terms of "giving odds"- this is one case where it is practically impossible for a stranger to the situation to help.

However, I will say this- I really do think you need to take the advice of some other posters and have a very honest and open conversation with that member.

The situation you find yourself in is not unique to the fact you are trying to join the fraternity of the other guy in this triangle. Between friends, in the workplace or in any social grouping- being that guy who cheated with someone's girlfriend or wife is going to put you in a very difficult position. This is all the more true if you are newer to that same workplace/social environment than the guy whose territory you have invaded because what you have done can also be perceived as an invasion against the entire social group the two of you have in common, or may have in common in the future.

I have, both in my fraternity and in many other settings, seen this kind of situation evolve many times. Sometimes it is two guys who just like the same girl, and once it involved a woman who has been married to her husband for several years. Usually it is somewhere in the middle.

Generally, I find most people are very reluctant to get involved in such matters because they are personal. Part of it is surely not wanting to try and get a co-worker fired or ostracize a fellow member of a group because they themselves might one day end up part of a similar story and would prefer the world just butt out. Also, people will tend to look at the big picture when picking sides or deciding to leave a situation alone. There is a big difference between bedding a man's otherwise faithful wife versus a man's girlfriend who is known to sleep around a lot.

Anyhow- that my general life take on the matter.

As for you specifically- getting this out in the open and resolving it now is your best bet. If doing that now really is going to keep you from becoming a Kappa- then it is going to come up later when you have already invested yourself in the chapter as a pledge anyway and the cost of your transgression could be much higher in many ways.

This is true and I already told him. He broke up with his girl who is also my friend. He told me he already knew about the whole thing.

[EE-BO]

Originally Posted by Tre 1

This is true and I already told him. He broke up with his girl who is also my friend. He told me he already knew about the whole thing.

Well, if he knows the whole thing and you are able to progress in your intake process, then hopefully that means it is not going to be an issue for you. Based on general past experience, I think you may get some crap for it- but all pledges get crap for something. A reason can always be found if one does not exist

Again- not knowing the specifics there is not much firm advice I can give- but now that it is all out there and discussed I think you are in the best possible position. Good luck to you!

[ladygreek]

Originally Posted by Tre 1

This is true and I already told him. He broke up with his girl who is also my friend. He told me he already knew about the whole thing.

I guess so since you seem to have diarrhea of the mouth.