Maximizing your options

[Katmandu]

I also think that a lot of people say "maximize your options" when they mean sticking with recruitment through the pref parties, since some women claim to have been cut from rush when they actually have dropped out prior to pref with one or more viable options still possible. Yes, it hurts to be cut by your favorite chapters before pref, but as we all know, opinions change, and sometimes they change a lot after pref night. A sorority that seemed just "ok" the day or two before can suddenly become "the one". Some chapters just don't shine in the hectic early rounds.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by pibetaphi2013

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe schools with guaranteed placement guarantee everyone who does everything you listed- and makes it to pref night- a bid.

In other words- even at those schools- you could be dropped from everywhere before pref and then you wouldn't receive a bid.

Right, that's why I said attend all parties to which you are invited. There is always the possibility that you won't be invited to ANY parties at some point.

Originally Posted by Katmandu

I also think that a lot of people say "maximize your options" when they mean sticking with recruitment through the pref parties, since some women claim to have been cut from rush when they actually have dropped out prior to pref with one or more viable options still possible. Yes, it hurts to be cut by your favorite chapters before pref, but as we all know, opinions change, and sometimes they change a lot after pref night. A sorority that seemed just "ok" the day or two before can suddenly become "the one". Some chapters just don't shine in the hectic early rounds.

Yep.

You don't know how many times a PNM has come here bemoaning "being cut from recruitment" but upon further questioning says "Well I had 2 houses left for Pref but I felt like I didn't fit in them so I dropped out." Not the same thing.

I get that it's your recruitment and it's up to you to do what you want. However, at many of the competitive schools that GC PNMs come from, withdrawing right before Pref pretty much means you aren't going to be Greek at all EVER (since your chances as a re-rushing sophomore are slim). I wish that a lot more PNMs at these schools would realize that.


Something else I wish PNMs thought about:

I also think that if you're at a school with chapters of at least 60-70+ or so women (random reasonably large number), chances are that you probably do "fit in" better with those 2 chapters you don't like than you think. There are too many different people for you to really say that you don't fit with either of them. You're bound to find some girls who are like you.

I could MAYBE buy the "don't fit" argument if your school has like 2 sororities and each of them has like 20 people (whom you know personally because your school has deferred recruitment). But if you're at somewhere like IU, UGA, etc. there are too many women in one chapter to really make an accurate statement about your "fit."

This seems like a ramble but I swear it made sense in my head. lol.

[pibetaphi2013]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

Right, that's why I said attend all parties to which you are invited. There is always the possibility that you won't be invited to ANY parties at some point.

oh, alright sorry.
I was just clarifying that "guaranteed bid" does not mean "guaranteed invites to at least one party".

[carnation]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

I also think that if you're at a school with chapters of at least 60-70+ or so women (random reasonably large number), chances are that you probably do "fit in" better with those 2 chapters you don't like than you think. There are too many different people for you to really say that you don't fit with either of them. You're bound to find some girls who are like you.

I could MAYBE buy the "don't fit" argument if your school has like 2 sororities and each of them has like 20 people (whom you know personally because your school has deferred recruitment). But if you're at somewhere like IU, UGA, etc. there are too many women in one chapter to really make an accurate statement about your "fit."

This is exactly why I don't buy the statement "you'll end up where you're a good fit" for PNMs at large schools. Besides the fact that it's a numbers game, the groups are too big to claim any kind of homegeneity.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by carnation

This is exactly why I don't buy the statement "you'll end up where you're a good fit" for PNMs at large schools. Besides the fact that it's a numbers game, the groups are too big to claim any kind of homegeneity.

But with large chapters it just increases the probability you'll 'fit' with any or most of them. The phrase is still utterly true, just not as specific as at other schools.

[carnation]

Most PNMs would fit into most of them, that's my point. But when someone spouts that line to a PNM who's just been cut from 12 out of 18 sororities at a competitive school after second parties, it doesn't ring true. Especially if she's in-state and in the know, she's aware that in a sorority of around 200 women, there are plenty whom she'd fit in with--and she probably already knows a bunch of them. She doesn't want or need to hear that crap about 'fits'.

I can see how at a medium or small-sized school, sororities would have "personalities" and people would clearly be able to see where they fit. That used to be true even at the big SEC schools. But...no more. Not with the massive pledge classes they have.

[FSUZeta]

Originally Posted by carnation

Most PNMs would fit into most of them, that's my point. But when someone spouts that line to a PNM who's just been cut from 12 out of 18 sororities at a competitive school after second parties, it doesn't ring true. Especially if she's in-state and in the know, she's aware that in a sorority of around 200 women, there are plenty whom she'd fit in with--and she probably already knows a bunch of them. She doesn't want or need to hear that crap about 'fits'.

I can see how at a medium or small-sized school, sororities would have "personalities" and people would clearly be able to see where they fit. That used to be true even at the big SEC schools. But...no more. Not with the massive pledge classes they have.

too true.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by carnation

Most PNMs would fit into most of them, that's my point. But when someone spouts that line to a PNM who's just been cut from 12 out of 18 sororities at a competitive school after second parties, it doesn't ring true. Especially if she's in-state and in the know, she's aware that in a sorority of around 200 women, there are plenty whom she'd fit in with--and she probably already knows a bunch of them. She doesn't want or need to hear that crap about 'fits'.

I can see how at a medium or small-sized school, sororities would have "personalities" and people would clearly be able to see where they fit. That used to be true even at the big SEC schools. But...no more. Not with the massive pledge classes they have.

It's like any sort of "sympathy" statement. Sometimes it's true and sometimes it's just the speakers best attempt to make the girl feel better. Particularly since if she's in the know she knows that 6 is still good and her recruitment is far from over.

I guess I'm not sure what else you're going to say. You can state fact: You have 6 left and that's really good. Sympathy: I'm sorry that sucks, I'm sure you'll still find your home. or overreaction: They're all bitches, you don't need to be with them anyway. For some girls one or the other of the first two will work, and the 'adult' shouldn't be encouraging the latter.

[turqwind]

Originally Posted by carnation

Most PNMs would fit into most of them, that's my point. But when someone spouts that line to a PNM who's just been cut from 12 out of 18 sororities at a competitive school after second parties, it doesn't ring true. Especially if she's in-state and in the know, she's aware that in a sorority of around 200 women, there are plenty whom she'd fit in with--and she probably already knows a bunch of them. She doesn't want or need to hear that crap about 'fits'.

I can see how at a medium or small-sized school, sororities would have "personalities" and people would clearly be able to see where they fit. That used to be true even at the big SEC schools. But...no more. Not with the massive pledge classes they have.

Thank you, Carnation. If PNM's with six groups left (using your numbers) drop out because they have lost their early favorites, then they will probably lose their chance to be in a GLO and some GLO's will lose some great girls. A girl may be wonderful in all ways and do everything to prepare for a successful recruitment, but if most of the girls in these 150+ "top" sororities have a sister, boyfriend's sister, cousin, neighbor, friend from cheer, band, etc. coming through, it doesn't leave much room for anybody else. Yes, Drolefille, Moms need to be ready to say some or all three: 1) "You still have six great groups looking at you. Give them a chance - they are giving you one." 2) "It does suck. Put on your big girls pants and carry on if this is what you want. If you are SURE this isn't what you want, that's o.k., too. Momma loves you!" 3) "You can't do anything about those other groups (thinking to yourself: "Those rotten little heifers! How dare they cut my perfect child! I will get on my broomstick right now and go see about that!"), so look forward and focus on the groups who are interested in you." "She was/wasn't a good fit," "You will end up where you belong," ... eh, these kind of remind me of Pinto and Flounder being put back on the couch during fraternity rush.

[carnation]

Originally Posted by turqwind

"She was/wasn't a good fit," "You will end up where you belong," ... eh, these kind of remind me of Pinto and Flounder being put back on the couch during fraternity rush.

LOL, too true!

[mittens]

Originally Posted by Katmandu

I also think that a lot of people say "maximize your options" when they mean sticking with recruitment through the pref parties, since some women claim to have been cut from rush when they actually have dropped out prior to pref with one or more viable options still possible. Yes, it hurts to be cut by your favorite chapters before pref, but as we all know, opinions change, and sometimes they change a lot after pref night. A sorority that seemed just "ok" the day or two before can suddenly become "the one". Some chapters just don't shine in the hectic early rounds.

Exactly. One sorority during my rush wasn't impressing me that greatly until Sisterhood Day and on Pref Day they blew me away... All my "favorite" chapters cut me before Pref Day. Honestly, if PNMs would give up an hour of their time to see what it's like to be an XYZ and have a little more in depth conversations with the actives, their minds would probably change. It's sad to see so many PNMs so preoccupied with their favorites and not giving another group a chance.