Boyfriend Question (please help)

[CopterDad]

I see that I was extremely shortsighted on this issue. I would want my daughter to get this type of support from y'all in this way as well.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by AOII Angel

You don't have to justify your decisions to anyone. I think that your decision is very respectful of the parties involved.

This. And I'd suggest that luvdrunk and you delete the explanation. Even that is too much information for anyone who might be familiar with the situation.

[AOII Angel]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

This. And I'd suggest that luvdrunk and you delete the explanation. Even that is too much information for anyone who might be familiar with the situation.

Will do, Chief Justice Mystic Cat.

[luvdrunk]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

This. And I'd suggest that luvdrunk and you delete the explanation. Even that is too much information for anyone who might be familiar with the situation.

Done!

I realized that after I posted it that I shouldn't justify myself. I remember in counseling sessions I would always try to justify/rationalize everything. My counselor also told me that not everything needs to be (ex: in this case my ex’s behaviors are not my fault nothing I could think of can justify/rationalize that).

Thanks for all the prayers and support. My first cousins (of which there are 12 on one side!) have been greatly supportive as well. They did an amzing job distracting me and letting me vent. I'm an only child so it feels like I have 11 (long story) great siblings!

I hope that if another young lady goes through the same situation I have gone through (am going through) she has the support and prayers of friends, family, sisters, and random people just like I have. It's almost impossible to break free on your own unless you have someone to tell you that it'll be OK, this person isn't worth it, they aren't going to change etc. I didn't know HOW to start to break it off, I came and asked and was helped greatly!
Thanks,

LD

[AZTheta]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

This. And I'd suggest that luvdrunk and you delete the explanation. Even that is too much information for anyone who might be familiar with the situation.

MysticCat, I am asking (since you are the SCJOGC)... would it be prudent to delete other details/information as well? Many of the replies had quotes as well...

Or should the thread move to never-never land?

I'm ever-vigilant, and I'm cautious. Maybe too much so, but it's kept me out of harm's way.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by CopterDad

I see that I was extremely shortsighted on this issue. I would want my daughter to get this type of support from y'all in this way as well.

I hope you would prefer your daughter have "real life" people from whom to get advice and support. I wouldn't want my daughter to come to Greekchat (and create a sock puppet) for advice and support.

You all shared some touching stories and confirmed what the OP knew she should be doing. What next? More posts from luvdrunk as this becomes the official Luvdrunk's Life thread? Yikes.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

What next? More posts from luvdrunk as this becomes the official Luvdrunk's Life thread? Yikes.

No, probably just someone who comes in to create a meta-discussion after the fact.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by Drolefille

No, probably just someone who comes in to create a meta-discussion after the fact.

As long as this doesn't become the Luvdrunk's Life thread.

[CopterDad]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

I hope you would prefer your daughter have "real life" people from whom to get advice and support. I wouldn't want my daughter to come to Greekchat (and create a sock puppet) for advice and support. snip.

True. Yet, the OP's real life support failed. If this device works for her, so be it.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by CopterDad

True. Yet, the OP's real life support failed. If this device works for her, so be it.

Congrats to her, but I hope Greekchat doesn't become the place of refuge. That's way too much responsibility for a message board.

[AOII Angel]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Congrats to her, but I hope Greekchat doesn't become the place of refuge. That's way too much responsibility for a message board.

I totally agree, yet so many women have support systems that fail them in these cases. It's sad that too many people blow off these warning signs.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by AOII Angel

I totally agree, yet so many women have support systems that fail them in these cases. It's sad that too many people blow off these warning signs.

I agree. I waited for a few pages for a reason.

[honeychile]

I have to tell y'all something about my own experience. My exhusband had me so isolated, the only support system I had was my family, and that was because we have a family business. I didn't know that my parents had suspected something was going on, but wanted me to say the word. So, after reading an article about abuse, I somehow managed to say to my mother that we need a code word, and if I ever used it, she would know I needed help.

We chose "brussel sprouts".

We were thinking I could work that into a shopping conversation, but it wasn't one that came up everyday. The day I really needed it, I was crying so hard, I could only get "br...br...br...br..." out, and she didn't put two and two together. Within 10 minutes, though, she realized, and the calvary came. We laughed about it for years, and I will never be able to eat brussel sprouts without laughing!

Hang in there, luvdrunk. May you have better times ahead, and may you be able to laugh about it.

[ZTAngel]

Locked at OP's request.