10-year-old's pregnancy fuels Mexican abortion debate

[AGDee]

First off, stepfathers are not usually legal guardians unless they adopt the child, in which case they are then "adoptive father" not stepfather.
Second, my point is that 10 year olds cannot and should not make decisions about their health care.
Third, according to the article, they do not know exactly when the mother alerted authorities or how far along the girl was at the time. It is entirely possible that the mom didn't know until it was too late in the pregnancy

State Attorney General Francisco Alor Quezada said he did not know whether officials had told the girl she had the option of pursuing an abortion, and he did not know how far the girl was into her pregnancy when her mother reported the assault to authorities last month.

He said the girl is in the custody of state protective services, and officials are closely monitoring her physical and psychological care.

Fourth, Because the child is in custody of state protective services, they are currently her legal guardians. Therefore, they would make the decision.

Many of the kids I worked with in adolescent psych were sexual abuse victims. It was unbelievable how many of them had mothers who would not leave the abuser. This mom did what she should.. she reported it, the stepdad was arrested.

[violetpretty]

Originally Posted by WinniBug

I would think that the psychological repercussions of an abortion would be worse.

Are you kidding me? Forcing a 10 year old to carry the product of a monster? Not only rape, statutory rape, AND incest. I fail to see why a product of incest should be born. I do not understand how someone could be against abortion even in cases of rape, incest, and threats to the mother's health, ALL 3 of which apply here.

Nevermind that I think that any "guilt" about abortions is COMPLETELY a product of socialization and not inherent.

[christiangirl]

By definition, this case doesn't seem to fit the bill for "incest." If Disgusto wasn't married to the girl's mother, they wouldn't be closely related enough to prohibit their marriage. I'm not defending him, but this whole thing is nauseating enough without adding more stigma than what the poor girl is already dealing with.

[RU OX Alum]

Originally Posted by AGDee

First off, stepfathers are not usually legal guardians unless they adopt the child, in which case they are then "adoptive father" not stepfather.
Second, my point is that 10 year olds cannot and should not make decisions about their health care.
Third, according to the article, they do not know exactly when the mother alerted authorities or how far along the girl was at the time. It is entirely possible that the mom didn't know until it was too late in the pregnancy

State Attorney General Francisco Alor Quezada said he did not know whether officials had told the girl she had the option of pursuing an abortion, and he did not know how far the girl was into her pregnancy when her mother reported the assault to authorities last month.

He said the girl is in the custody of state protective services, and officials are closely monitoring her physical and psychological care.

Fourth, Because the child is in custody of state protective services, they are currently her legal guardians. Therefore, they would make the decision.

Many of the kids I worked with in adolescent psych were sexual abuse victims. It was unbelievable how many of them had mothers who would not leave the abuser. This mom did what she should.. she reported it, the stepdad was arrested.

I get that they would make the decision, I just don't agree with it.

[AGDee]

I'll be totally honest here. If my 10 year old was raped and became pregnant, I wouldn't even TELL her that she was pregnant. I'd tell her that the attacker did damage that required surgery, which isn't really a lie. Just as parents don't always tell kids that they are being tested for things like leukemia until they know results.

[christiangirl]

Originally Posted by AGDee

I'll be totally honest here. If my 10 year old was raped and became pregnant, I wouldn't even TELL her that she was pregnant. I'd tell her that the attacker did damage that required surgery, which isn't really a lie. Just as parents don't always tell kids that they are being tested for things like leukemia until they know results.

You know what? I, personally, don't think I would handle it that way (because no one really knows what they'd do if they were faced with this) but I totally see why you would. I hadn't even thought of that through the course of this thread and I'm not sure if a surgeon would even do it, but that seems like a pretty darn good idea. There are some downsides to that, but there are so many upsides that I know I'd consider it pretty hard.

[Benzgirl]

Originally Posted by christiangirl

Since we're on the subject, it seems to be normal in Bulgaria, too: http://www.nydailynews.com/news/worl...r_wedding.html. Now, THAT'S a sad story.

Yes and No. She's a gypsy, not a Bulgarian.

Originally Posted by christiangirl

I know, I was referring to the part of the article where the grandmother said it's normal for their girls (in Bulgaria) to have babies young--she just didn't want that for her granddaughter.

No it's not normal for Bulgarians, but is for gypsies. Even when my grandmother lived there, it was unusual to have children before 16. And that was 100 years ago.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by RU OX Alum

It should be her decision alone, in my view, because it is her.

The 10 year old in question will make a better decision than any adult who it isn't happening ever could.

I look forward to the day the laws catch up with that ridiculous line of thinking.

Parents would love for their children to be able to to help pay the household bills, drive themselves everywhere, and take control of their own schooling and futures. And while they're at it, if they want to smoke, drink, and fuck--why not? They are fully aware of themselves and fully capable of making such decisions. Children are just shortass adults. Child labor laws and statutory laws are complete bullshit.

Scoff.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by christiangirl

Angel's Advocate: If you've just admitted that adults couldn't predit their own emotional and mental well-being, they why should they get to override the girl's decision regarding hers?

You know the answer to that question. If you don't, think of your interactions with children and the stupid things that they generally think are soooooo important.

Originally Posted by christiangirl

Would your feelings on that change depending on what she chose?

No.

If that family decides she should have the child (and the state doesn't intervene) then that means the family will HOPEFULLY assist with prenatal care, raising the child, and the necessary counseling. I think that would be a dumb decision but it would hopefully be an adult-made decision.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by AGDee

I'll be totally honest here. If my 10 year old was raped and became pregnant, I wouldn't even TELL her that she was pregnant. I'd tell her that the attacker did damage that required surgery, which isn't really a lie. Just as parents don't always tell kids that they are being tested for things like leukemia until they know results.

Same here.

And I don't care whether or not it's a lie. Parents/adults lie to children for less important things.

[WinniBug]

Originally Posted by VandalSquirrel

What about the psychological repercussions of being a child (allegedly) raped by your stepfather and forced to have that child, in addition to the physical hardships of pregnancy and childbirth on a child body?

I agree that rape's a horrible thing to happen to anyone, but nothing can be done about that NOW...what there is control over is whether the little girl has to live the rest of her life knowing she killed her little baby.

[DrPhil]

They were dumb for letting her know she's pregnant.

[tld221]

Originally Posted by WinniBug

I agree that rape's a horrible thing to happen to anyone, but nothing can be done about that NOW...what there is control over is whether the little girl has to live the rest of her life knowing she killed her little baby.

Its not "her baby." Neither party had intentions nor discussed who would have ownership over said baby. And the child wouldn't be killing her baby. If anything, (in this case) aborting this unborn child would be a small step in righting this wrong.

On the "if this was my child" side of things, I too would do/say/act however I needed to make sure my child could endure the least amount of trauma. Certainly, going through childbirth at 10, IMO is out the window, regardless if the child would be kept or given for adoption. She would have a lifetime membership on the couch and therapy on a consistent basis. Her views on men, sex (and sexual abuse), trust, her body, relationships, children/procreation, and abortion, etc are skewed forever, and I highly doubt her brain can act in a childlike manner much longer.

As a mother, I'd seek therapy as well.. imagine the mother's psyche: her baby has been deflowered and taken advantage of in the worst way by someone you loved/trusted. That has to screw with a mother's mind.

Were there any legal repurcussions for the mother? I highly doubt the stepfather's rape was a one-time thing. The mother seriously had no idea? (Excuse my ignorance as I didn't read the article)

[violetpretty]

Originally Posted by WinniBug

I agree that rape's a horrible thing to happen to anyone, but nothing can be done about that NOW...what there is control over is whether the little girl has to live the rest of her life knowing she killed her little baby.

Imagine being that "baby"...grown up. Imagine how you'd feel knowing you were the product of incest. That's something that therapy can not heal. Better to not bring that life into the world.

[tld221]

Originally Posted by violetpretty

Imagine being that "baby"...grown up. Imagine how you'd feel knowing you were the product of incest. That's something that therapy can not heal. Better to not bring that life into the world.

Seriously: I'd much rather spare someone the feeling of not being properly cared for (financially, emotionally) because they werent exactly wanted/asked for.