Do You Judge?

[groovypq]

Originally Posted by thetygerlily

One of my big ones is smoking. Both of my parents smoke, and I'm allergic to cigarette smoke. I think some smokers are fairly ignorant about how what they do affects others. There's the argument of "I'm only hurting myself, it's my choice"- but I can smell it on you, I know you did it, and yes it does affect me. And when it's in close proximity, yes it does hurt me through secondhand smoke. And just because you doused yourself in cologne and stood outside for 10 minutes in 20 degree weather? Oh yeah, that stench is still there (btw I'm also allergic to fragrance/cologne, sweet). My dad bathed my dog in cologne once so I wouldn't be able to smell it... thanks for trying, dad. I suppose one step further, don't say you're trying to quit if you're not. I get that it's hard, but don't tell me you're quitting as I hear you take a puff on the other end of the phone. So rational or irrational, I innately judge on smoking.

Oh thank heaven. I'm not the only one. I'm not allergic to smoke, but I wear gas permeable contacts and I just cannot be around smoke or it dries them up something awful. I've even found that if I'm near someone who is a heavy smoker and/or the smell clings to their clothes, my eyes will get dry.

My boyfriend smoked when I first met him (although I wouldn't have known it if he hadn't told me - he never did it around me and the smell did not cling to him at all) but quit about a month into our relationship. It was tough for him at first - and he's surrounded by smokers at work so that doesn't help - and I felt like his smoking friends weren't being much help. One flat-out gave him crap about quitting and others would smoke like chimneys around him in social settings. I know they have a right to smoke, but it seems to me if you were a supportive friend, you wouldn't be blowing smoke in the face of someone trying to quit. It got so bad one time we were out with a group that we had to leave (for both our sakes). So I guess I'm judgmental on that front.

[tld221]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Everyone judges. Everyone. Every-one. E-ver-y-one. There was never a human who hasn't judge. Even saying something like "...I'll just pray for you and that God takes care of it" is a judgment that the person needs to be prayed for and divinely taken care of.

Originally Posted by DaemonSeid

And if someone says that they don't I judge them to be liars.

End of thread.

^^ this, up here.

Originally Posted by als463

Okay, fair enough. Do you find yourself drawn to certain types of people moreso than others? I'm not saying that not everyone judges. I guess I am just asking what it is that makes YOU judge people?

of course, and that's natural selection, survival of the fittest type stuff. Like attracts like, in most cases, because its familiar and doesnt require extra work to identify and relate.

Originally Posted by Kevin

It's not that you judge.

It's why you judge.

Right. I judge (internally) because its funny as heck and know that 98% of the time its just jokes. Even when it's out loud its for comedic effect.

[cheerfulgreek]

Yes, I do it. It's just that there are certain people I don't like to associate myself with. I don't feel about it, though, because everyone is biased about something or someone to some degree.

[sceniczip]

I judge people who put out professional ads with glaring misspellings. I'm not talking about small things, I'm talking about things that if you had bothered to hit the spell check button, it definitely would have caught the mistakes. I refuse to do business with people like that.

I'm pretty judgmental about grammar and spelling in general and have to fight the urge not to correct some people (like professors when they're writing on the board in class) but my grammar and spelling isn't perfect by any means so I try not to let it influence me too much.

Sorry if that wasn't as deep as religion and race and such

[thetygerlily]

Originally Posted by sceniczip

I judge people who put out professional ads with glaring misspellings. I'm not talking about small things, I'm talking about things that if you had bothered to hit the spell check button, it definitely would have caught the mistakes. I refuse to do business with people like that.

I'm pretty judgmental about grammar and spelling in general and have to fight the urge not to correct some people (like professors when they're writing on the board in class) but my grammar and spelling isn't perfect by any means so I try not to let it influence me too much.

Sorry if that wasn't as deep as religion and race and such

That's a good one too. I used to be a recruiter and you'd be amazed at what people will put on their resumes. You get 1-2 pages to promote yourself and you choose crap? Awesome. I also have an aunt who believes that all plural words end in apostrophe-s. Thank's, your's, cookie's, anything goes. Is it THAT hard to learn possessive and plural rules? Or basic spelling? I suppose I interpret that as either not detail-oriented or not caring.

[deepimpact2]

Originally Posted by als463

I talked about the Satanist thing, but I gave my reasons for it. Anyone else have certain circumstances they want to discuss.

I will be honest here. I don't see anything wrong with you choosing not to associate yourself with someone like that. I don't see that as judging. As a Christian I do not wish to associate with people who worship satan. It has nothing to do with being judgmental. There are spiritual reasons why i wouldn't associate with someone like that and I don't think you should offer excuses or reasons for it. It is what it is.

I judge people although I try not to. However, I also think that people use the term "judging" too loosely. For instance when I discuss how homosexuality is a sin based on what I have read in the Bible, that is not judgment. Yet people categorize it as being so. Judgment in relation to that would be saying that a homosexual person is going to hell.

Also there are times when I size people up based on their behavior, organizations they belong to, or things like that. I sometimes use that to decide whether I should or should not allow someone into my inner circle or whether I should keep my distance. I consider that more of a discernment thing and useful for protecting myself from friendships with people who may wish me harm.

[ProBlack]

Id be the first to admit that i am judgemental...its not always a nice thing but...it is what it is...
for example...if i see a female talking loud or dressed a certain way im quick to assume that she isnt a lady...this happens pretty often

[DaemonSeid]

Originally Posted by deepimpact2

I don't see that as judging. As a Christian I do not wish to associate with people who worship satan. It has nothing to do with being judgmental.

Really?

I mean, REALLY?

[sceniczip]

Originally Posted by thetygerlily

That's a good one too. I used to be a recruiter and you'd be amazed at what people will put on their resumes. You get 1-2 pages to promote yourself and you choose crap? Awesome. I also have an aunt who believes that all plural words end in apostrophe-s. Thank's, your's, cookie's, anything goes. Is it THAT hard to learn possessive and plural rules? Or basic spelling? I suppose I interpret that as either not detail-oriented or not caring.

Yeah... That basically sums it up. Or people who think it's appropriate to use the letter "u" for you in a paper that's worth half your grade. REALLY?! REALLY?! Feels good to get that off my chest lol.

[xomanadaxo]

Originally Posted by Kevin

It's not that you judge.

It's why you judge.

Well said.

I think it's human nature to judge, so I have no problems with people making judgments, as long as they are willing to reshape those judgments once they learn more about the person. It's when people stick to false assumptions in spite of evidence to the contrary that the old saying about ASSuming becomes relevant.

[DiamondAthena]

I USED to judge ppl who could not (or would not) control their children in public. Then my kid turned 2! Now I understand that no matter how well disciplined or well behaved a kid may be, you can not CONTROL your kids in all situations.

[ProBlack]

Originally Posted by DiamondAthena

I USED to judge ppl who could not (or would not) control their children in public. Then my kid turned 2! Now I understand that no matter how well disciplined or well behaved a kid may be, you can not CONTROL your kids in all situations.

yea...until i had to take my nephew out with me, whos a year and a half....i did not understand
funny how stop and no dont mean anything to them once you step out the house

[DiamondAthena]

Originally Posted by ProBlack

stop and no dont mean anything to them once you step out the house

^^^^ this

Oh and I also judge ppl with poor phone etiquette.
Conversations that go like this....

Person: Hello
Me: Hello, may I speak to Jane?
Jane: This me

Or an actual conversation with a relative...

Cousin: Hello
Me: Hi is this the Smith residence
Cousin: Nah this aint no residence, black ppl live here, this our house.

....make me assume ppl are uneducated even though I know that is not necessarily true.

[KSUViolet06]

I judge people wHo tYp3 lyK3 thIS.

I also judge people who use text speak (such as lol or omg) in professional communications (such as emails to colleagues).

I really enjoy judging people who do not use capital letters where appropriate.

I also judge parents who see their kids acting out in a restaurant setting and do nothing about it. I am trying to eat and hold a conversation. I cannot do that with your child attempting to climb into my booth (while you and your husband are ignoring him or her).

[Psi U MC Vito]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

I judge people wHo tYp3 lyK3 thIS.

I also judge people who use text speak (such as lol or omg) in professional communications (such as emails to colleagues).

What about people who use text speak in actual conversations?