Preparing for recruitment since birth

[Just interested]

To answer TriDeltaSallie, from what I've seen over the years, and this is just my observation, many moms from my part of the world anyway, would prefer their daughter go Top Tier, over their own group even their own chapter. I have seen it too many times. They call it finding the best fit for their daughter. It is moving up the social ladder. They have seen to it that daughter went to right HS, the right summer camp and I hate to say this, even the right church. This is certainly not everyone but it is enough to be noticed by those of us who work on Reference Boards. It is an amazing thing to watch as an observer to positioning that takes place. This is going to be an interesting thread.

[TriDeltaSallie]

Originally Posted by Just interested

To answer TriDeltaSallie, from what I've seen over the years, and this is just my observation, many moms from my part of the world anyway, would prefer their daughter go Top Tier, over their own group even their own chapter. I have seen it too many times. They call it finding the best fit for their daughter. It is moving up the social ladder. They have seen to it that daughter went to right HS, the right summer camp and I hate to say this, even the right church. This is certainly not everyone but it is enough to be noticed by those of us who work on Reference Boards. It is an amazing thing to watch as an observer to positioning that takes place. This is going to be an interesting thread.

Could you give some examples of how moving to the "top tier" would change life for Mary Sue? Would her "top tier" status impact the rest of her ABC family relations? If so, how so? And if not, why not?

[aopirose]

Originally Posted by TriDeltaSallie

Could you give some examples of how moving to the "top tier" would change life for Mary Sue? Would her "top tier" status impact the rest of her ABC family relations? If so, how so? And if not, why not?

A lady that I know is a 60-year-plus member of her GLO. A few years ago she told me that she was sorry that she joined ABC because after she graduated, she was not invited to join certain organizations. She felt certain that it was because she was an ABC and the women in charge of the organizations were XYZs.

When her daughters and granddaughters rushed, she never even mentioned that she was an ABC even though there were chapters at those schools. She was so proud when her girls joined the "right" houses and that one granddaughter was an XYZ. According to her, that XYZ pin opened the gates of heaven for the girl. She was invited to join all the organizations that her she "couldn't" and that she was very proud that her ABC legacy status didn't taint her. I sat there stunned and then I told her that I was sorry that she felt that way. I also told her that I belonged to a couple of her "dream" organizations and that I knew for a fact that there were many ABCs who were quite involved. One ABC was even president! She didn't know what to say. Some things do change over 50 years.

[carnation]

To the top!

[TriDeltaSallie]

It's funny this got bumped. I STILL think of that little Theta cheerleader story from time to time. I'd love to know what happens to her eventually. LOL!

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by Just interested

To answer TriDeltaSallie, from what I've seen over the years, and this is just my observation, many moms from my part of the world anyway, would prefer their daughter go Top Tier, over their own group even their own chapter. I have seen it too many times. They call it finding the best fit for their daughter. It is moving up the social ladder. They have seen to it that daughter went to right HS, the right summer camp and I hate to say this, even the right church. This is certainly not everyone but it is enough to be noticed by those of us who work on Reference Boards. It is an amazing thing to watch as an observer to positioning that takes place. This is going to be an interesting thread.

We must be from the same part of the world. This sounds like the people I grew up around to me.

[ASTalumna06]

I was actually thinking about this thread the other day. In reference to "brainwashing" at such a young age..

A girl who I went to school with and very much like, is basically having a baby as I speak (or type, rather). She's having a daughter. She had posted pics of the nursery her and her husband decorated and furnished, and there was a picture of the crib... with a ladybug pillow and blanket.

Someone, who I'm guessing is one of her sisters, commented on how much she loved the ladybugs. Mother-to-be commented back, "She's doomed to be an ASA from birth; her birthstone will either be a Pearl (June) or a Ruby (July), my parents already call her "ladybug", and her middle name is Phoenix.

The friend replied, "How perfect is all of that! She is absolutely meant to be a baby bug!"

Talk about pressure...

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by ASTalumna06

I was actually thinking about this thread the other day. In reference to "brainwashing" at such a young age..

A girl who I went to school with and very much like, is basically having a baby as I speak (or type, rather). She's having a daughter. She had posted pics of the nursery her and her husband decorated and furnished, and there was a picture of the crib... with a ladybug pillow and blanket.

Someone, who I'm guessing is one of her sisters, commented on how much she loved the ladybugs. Mother-to-be commented back, "She's doomed to be an ASA from birth; her birthstone will either be a Pearl (June) or a Ruby (July), my parents already call her "ladybug", and her middle name is Phoenix.

The friend replied, "How perfect is all of that! She is absolutely meant to be a baby bug!"

Talk about pressure...

Damn. My whole family is Greek and the women are mostly Kappa Deltas, but there were no "Future KD" baby clothes involved in my upbringing. And if I have a daughter I won't be doing that to her either. I wonder how bad the ones that don't get in to their mother's chapter feel.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by ASTalumna06

I was actually thinking about this thread the other day. In reference to "brainwashing" at such a young age..

A girl who I went to school with and very much like, is basically having a baby as I speak (or type, rather). She's having a daughter. She had posted pics of the nursery her and her husband decorated and furnished, and there was a picture of the crib... with a ladybug pillow and blanket.

Someone, who I'm guessing is one of her sisters, commented on how much she loved the ladybugs. Mother-to-be commented back, "She's doomed to be an ASA from birth; her birthstone will either be a Pearl (June) or a Ruby (July), my parents already call her "ladybug", and her middle name is Phoenix.

The friend replied, "How perfect is all of that! She is absolutely meant to be a baby bug!"

Talk about pressure...

No she's not. I'm going to give her a no-rec for having parents who middle named her Phoenix. Baby bug = BARF. I hope to heaven they're kidding around and not serious.

ETA by the time I was a sorority member for a year or so, I knew well enough the vast differences between chapters to not automatically say "I want my daughter to be an ASA." I'd encountered chapters I'd be horribly uncomfortable in - why on earth would I think my daughter would be less so?

Then again, the kind of thing we're talking about in this thread seems (at least for the social climbers) to have very little to do with the daughter or son's comfort or happiness. Ditto the women who are desparately trying (on their own) to shoehorn themselves into chapters they have nothing in common with. It's bad enough if you're just trying to do that because XYZ is the most popular group on campus. It's even worse if you feel it's going to affect the rest of your life on a daily basis.