With Regrets

[RedRover]

This story is coming to me fourth- or fifth-hand.

A daughter of a friend of mine pledged a sorority at a university with a competitiive Greek system in another state. (Her parents are divorced and she lives with her mother in one state, her father lives here in Pennsylvania.)

According to my friend (the father), his daughter signed up for sorority recruitment. After the introductory round, she was invited back to all the sororities on campus. However, she wasn't permitted to accept all the invitations for the second round. She was able to accept a limited a number of invitations, which she did. She did indicate to the other sororities was declining their invitations "with regret."

The young woman then went through the second round of visits (philanthropy?). Again she was invited back to all the sororities she visited, but their number of acceptances again were limited. Again, she indicated to the sororities that she was declining their invitations with regret.

After the third round (skit?), she didn't receive any invitation to the preference round.

Here is where things get kinda hazy. According to the father, his daughter received invitations to preference parties from some of the sororities that she regretfully declined. She attended the Bid Day cermonies and accepted a bid from one of those sororities. She went through "pledging" and is now a member of XYZ sorority.

Somehow I doubt that she could have been invited to a preference night party from a sorority that she previously declined. I could see a receiving an informal bid after the formal recruitment process.

Does of this make sense? Like I said I heard this story through a number of people acting as filters.

[DefyingGravity]

It's possible! I know of several people who did not get a pref invite to the sorority they eventually got a formal bid from.

[KSUViolet06]

This is possible.

if a school is using accept/regret, "regretting" a chapter DOES NOT = cutting them completely. You are simply ranking them low on the list of chapters you'd like to return to.

If a girl does not get invites back from any of her top ranked choices, a chapter she "declined with regret" is placed in her schedule so that sh can have a full schedule of parties.

This scenario is very possible. If this girl did not receive Pref invites from any of her top ranked choices, then chapters from her "regret list" were put on her schedule, allowing her to still have a full schedule of Pref parties and end up with a bid.

[33girl]

I just searched but there are waaaaaay too many threads with the word regret in them (maybe someone else remembers one). We talked about this when it first came out and it is used mostly by competitive systems.

I think it's a great idea - provided it is sincerely what the PNM wants to do. When there are a certain number of perceived "top girls" that all the groups are competing for, it seems like it helps the other girls out.

[RedRover]

According to my friend, his daughter seems to be happy in the sorority she pledged.

[AlwaysSAI]

^^^And, that is what matters most. Congrats to her!

[exlurker]

Originally Posted by 33girl

I just searched but there are waaaaaay too many threads with the word regret in them (maybe someone else remembers one). We talked about this when it first came out and it is used mostly by competitive systems.

I think it's a great idea - provided it is sincerely what the PNM wants to do. When there are a certain number of perceived "top girls" that all the groups are competing for, it seems like it helps the other girls out.

A thread from Way Back When on "regret with interest" is at:

http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...regrets&page=3

However, I recall reading on GC somewhere that the regret with interest option was not used as often now as it used to be at some schools, because it wasn't needed as much now that the Release Figures method of invitations has been implemented. But it certainly was / is(?) an option some places.

[Zillini]

With the advent of RFM, the Accept/Regret process has been replaced by Preferential Ranking system on most campuses. The A/R process is done after Chapters have submitted invitation lists. Pref Ranking occurs after parties are completed and before invitations lists are turned in.

Regret With Interest is supposed to tell Panhellenic and the Chapters that a PNM would have accepted had she been allowed more choices. One of the problems I've seen is that some PNMs would Regret With Interest even though they couldn't stand XYZ. They thought it made them look better, less picky, more open minded, etc. The PNM can later say "I didn't reject lousy, crappy GPA ranking, non-competitive, low tier, party animals or study nerds, fill-in-the-blank XYZ. I would have accepted if my party list wasn't already full." On many campuses the possibility of later getting an invitation from somewhere you previously regretted is slim. But when it happened the PNM wasn't happy and she would simply regret them again, this time without interest.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by Zillini

One of the problems I've seen is that some PNMs would Regret With Interest even though they couldn't stand XYZ. They thought it made them look better, less picky, more open minded, etc. The PNM can later say "I didn't reject lousy, crappy GPA ranking, non-competitive, low tier, party animals or study nerds, fill-in-the-blank XYZ. I would have accepted if my party list wasn't already full." On many campuses the possibility of later getting an invitation from somewhere you previously regretted is slim. But when it happened the PNM wasn't happy and she would simply regret them again, this time without interest.

This is exactly what I meant, thank you. I think RR misinterpreted my comment as casting some sort of aspersion on her friend's daughter. It had nothing to do with her, but with the concept in general.