Not Keen on Having Kids support thread - Page 3

deepimpact2 · #1 09-07-2009, 11:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AGDee

I feel those of you who are complaining about doctors being reluctant to perform more permanent birth control methods. When I got divorced, I asked my doctor about getting my tubes tied (at age 37!) and was vehemently told "No way". I already HAD two kids and I absolutely knew that I never wanted to have another one. But my doctor said "Do you know how many women come in at age 40, are remarried and NOW want their tubals reversed because they want a baby with their new husband?" Well, here I am, at age 44, still having to deal with less effective methods because that woman didn't think I knew what I wanted at the time. I definitely get it! I'm going to ask about Essure the next time I go in.

That's really too bad. Well try to look at it this way, I think Essure is supposed to be even more effective than having tubes tied, so maybe in the long run, the doctor's trifling behavior will work out better for you. (Please don't think I'm making light of your valid frustration with the doctor because that is not my intent at all.

)

LatinaAlumna · #2 09-07-2009, 01:17 PM

If someone knows they do not want kids and makes a decision not to have them, I applaud that! There are too many kids running around out there with parents who really didn't want to be parents, but felt it was "the thing to do."

SWTXBelle · #3 09-07-2009, 01:34 PM

I don't understand why anyone would want to CONVINCE someone who didn't want children to have them - parenting is tough enough when it is something you want to do. As I look at the headlines (in the past few months 3 children under CPS (Child Protection Services) DIED horrible, brutal, deaths here in the Houston area), I can only wish those parents hadn't decided to have/keep children. If you don't want children, more power to you. I'll support your choice not to have children if you won't accuse me of overpopulating the world with my 4 healthy, intelligent, loved children.

AOII Angel · #4 09-07-2009, 03:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

I don't understand why anyone would want to CONVINCE someone who didn't want children to have them - parenting is tough enough when it is something you want to do. As I look at the headlines (in the past few months 3 children under CPS (Child Protection Services) DIED horrible, brutal, deaths here in the Houston area), I can only wish those parents hadn't decided to have/keep children. If you don't want children, more power to you. I'll support your choice not to have children if you won't accuse me of overpopulating the world with my 4 healthy, intelligent, loved children.

God...I hope I wouldn't beat a child of mine, but you never know...I really have no patience! Really, though, I think deciding to be a parent should be more than a "well everyone else is doing it" thought process. I'm glad someone else wants to take the fall for us selfish lifestylers and keep the world overpopulated!

ZTAngel · #5 09-07-2009, 05:35 PM

I'd like to have kids but I'm just not there yet. I still enjoy taking spontaneous vacations with my husband, spending my weekend afternoons at the pool or shopping, and going out for drinks with my friends on Friday and Saturday night. I'm not ready to give that up yet. At the same time, I know that I'm not getting any younger and I don't want to end up waiting too long only to find out that I can't have kids. My husband will finally graduate from his doctorate program early next year and that's when we have to really start thinking about growing our family. I just really wish that I could wait another 5 years or so without worrying whether I'll still easily be able to get pregnant. I know that I definitely want kids but I'm just not 100% ready yet. But I also don't want to wait until my eggs are past their expiration date.

It's a trade off.

SWTXBelle · #6 09-07-2009, 05:56 PM

FWIW - I had my first 2 children at 25 and 27, and the last 2 at 37 and 39. It's MUCH easier when you are younger - AND you have the advantage of having them out of the house while you are still young (ish). As you say, it's a trade-off. Love and adore my children - but by the time I have an empty nest, I will have had nestlings for 32 years. Not that I counted.

I plan on being INCREDIBLY selfish!