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  #16  
Old 04-28-2009, 08:48 PM
nittanyalum nittanyalum is offline
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Originally Posted by AlphaFrog View Post
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  #17  
Old 04-28-2009, 10:03 PM
kayrs24 kayrs24 is offline
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Pledging panhel. and doing a non-panhel. sorority?

I'm really torn right now. I will be a sophomore next fall and I was thinking about pledging a Panhellanic sorority but I am already a member of a non-greek community service sorority.... I really want to do both, but I just wondered if anyone has done this and been able to balance it...
Thanks!
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  #18  
Old 04-28-2009, 10:03 PM
myopicsunflower myopicsunflower is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SWTXBelle View Post
With the attitude you have shown in this post, I can't imagine any of the groups mentioned thinking you would be a positive addition to their sisterhood.
Co-sign. Your junior status may not work against you in recruitment, but your attitude and lack of discretion certainly could.

There are lots of opportunities for philanthropy and service in college, and a sorority is not the only place to find them.
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  #19  
Old 04-28-2009, 10:04 PM
knight_shadow knight_shadow is offline
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http://www.greekchat.com/gcforums/sh...ad.php?t=86918
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  #20  
Old 04-28-2009, 10:11 PM
kayrs24 kayrs24 is offline
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I already read "A service sorority or fraternity and an NPC - allowed"
but i just wondered if anyone had done this and found it to be too difficult or do-able or if any of your sisters had any problems with it...etc
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  #21  
Old 04-28-2009, 10:26 PM
myopicsunflower myopicsunflower is offline
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I knew Greek women at my school who were also members of ESA, and it wasn't an issue. I also know Greeks from other schools who were in Alpha Phi Omega, and they never seemed to have any problems. I think as long as you're upholding your time commitments to your GLO, you're probably fine.
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  #22  
Old 04-29-2009, 02:03 AM
BeOfService1rst BeOfService1rst is offline
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Response to feedback

Quote:
Originally Posted by KSUViolet06 View Post
I'm surprised that with everything you claim to stand for, that no one in your family taught you anything about the concept of DISCRETION and not putting tons of info out about who you are over the internet. It's considered to be bad form and very inappropriate.


Your persistent stereotyping of a grgoup of women you obviously know nothing about is also VERY inappropriate.


Because I'm feeling a little nice today:

1. Depending on your school, not being a freshman student will negatively affect you.

2. Sorority women are human. With any group of females, there is bound to be drama--whether it be a sorority or otherwise. That's just part of life. If you cannot handle that, then being in a sorority is probably not for you, as sorority sisters do often have conflicts and disagreements.

3. Sororities are by nature exlusive organizations in that not every girl who participates in recruitment is going to be asked to be part of one. Again, if this is something you take issue with, it may not be for you.

4. Skimpy clothing is not exclusive to sorority members. If you think that it is, you have alot to learn about life before you join any sorority.

4a. Yes. It's a sorority, not the chain gang. Again, you can't be serious with how dense some of your questions sound.

5. This is your life and not theirs. The sorority a person joins has to be a good fit for THEM, not their parents, godparents, etc.

6. Again, this is your life.

7. Sororities are not cults full of women with the same beliefs and thoughts. Part of being in a sorority involves interacting with women who have DIFFERENT worldviews than you. If you are not prepared to do that, then a sorority is not for you.

8. JL varies by city and depending on where you live, miost of the JL members may be sorority alumnae, but there are also places where NO ONE in JL is a sorority member. It jusrt depends and you need not be a sorority alumna to join.

Bottom line: If all you want to do is talk about how intellectual and indivdual you are, and you are not interested in meeting new people who do not share your worldviews, you are better of NOT joining a sorority.

No sorority is going to be interested in someone who thinks this way about sorority members and sorority life.
Oh, my. I must say that I realize that I put some inappropriate comments in the first post, but I want to stress that after much thought I decided that complete honesty and openess (about myself and my reservations) would be the best course of action. I took for granted that people would assume that my spending time in a forum was an indication that I am interested in greek life and seek to be corrected about any misconceptions that I may have about sorority membership. What I did fail to do is to list the reasons that I am attracted to greek life:

1.) I have met many wonderful people at my school and some of the people that I respect the most are members of the sororities. I know multiple people in all of them whom I respect.

2.) I have been very impressed when I repeatedly see sorority members around town at volunteer events.

3.) Some of the nicest people on campus have been sorors. Often they have helped me out when I need help the most.

4.) I have repeatedly been impressed during group work and class presentations when sorors repeatedly demonstrate superb preparation that is consistently reflected in seamless, stellar presentations.

5.) I have seen sorors in crisis; and then I have seen their sisters come to their aid and try to rectify the situation. I found it endearing, admirable and very inspiring.

6.) There have been some instances when I have talked with a soror who was about to speak negatively about another and was stopped by her sister. I took note.

7.) When I am around sorors and the topic of their respective sororities come up, what they have to say is always positive.

I could go on, but I hope this suffices to say that the compassion, altruism, work ethic and love between sorors is something that has inspired me. I aspire to many of the attributes that they demonstrate.

When I ask seemingly negative questions, it is not because I subscribe to stereotypes, but because I want to hear how other greeks will respond to the questions. I expected that I would receive constructive criticism about some of the ignorant or misguided notions that I may have demonstrated. I will take KSUViolet06's comments and respond to them:

*On discretion: when I felt that I needed help I thought that an anonymous forum might be a way to ask people who don't know me for honest, open, direct advice. In order to get that type of advice I felt that I had to be very honest and open myself. It was not my intention to offend sensibilities.

1.) Thank you for your answer.

2.) I thought that I did state that I understood that there will be some "issues" along the way. I just wanted reassurance.

3.) Again, I thought that I did state that I understood and accepted this aspect of the system. If I was unclear I apologize.

4.) I phrased the question very unintelligently. Not very thoughtful of me in the least. I do understand that sorors are by no means anywhere near the worst offenders in this respect.

4a.) Again, an inelegant question. I also apologize for that one.

5.) Point taken. Like I said, I do find this aspect of my life to be something of note. I do not claim to always understand WASPs, even if I live with them.

6.) Again, this is another thing that I comes to mind for me when I think about greek life. I hope that you can understand this.

7.) I think I may have been misunderstood. I understand that one can only grow when one is exposed to different viewpoints. I was saying that I hope this is the case in sororities. I now assume that it is.

8.) Thank you for your answer.

Re: to "Bottom Line": "Intellectual" is a term that I do not like that is often applied to me by others. I do not think it is a thing of pride and realize that identifying oneself as such can be alienating. I am not sure how else to respond to this. I am interested in meeting diverse, thoughtful people and understand that such people can be found in sororities.

I do not have a negative view of sororities; in fact, I thought that the positive aspects of them would be taken for granted. I hope that I can be better understood after having written this.

Faithfully,

Me
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  #23  
Old 04-29-2009, 02:11 AM
BeOfService1rst BeOfService1rst is offline
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Smile Prodigal daughter #2

Response to feedback


I wanted to try to clear up some of the misunderstandings that my last post may have caused. The quote and response below can be found at the end of the original thread. While this may not completely redeem me, I wanted to make sure that at least there was some clarification about the conversation that I was attempting to have in such an inelegant fashion. Please accept my sincere apologies. I hope that I can be excused for any misgivings:

Quote:
Originally Posted by KSUViolet06
I'm surprised that with everything you claim to stand for, that no one in your family taught you anything about the concept of DISCRETION and not putting tons of info out about who you are over the internet. It's considered to be bad form and very inappropriate.


Your persistent stereotyping of a grgoup of women you obviously know nothing about is also VERY inappropriate.


Because I'm feeling a little nice today:

1. Depending on your school, not being a freshman student will negatively affect you.

2. Sorority women are human. With any group of females, there is bound to be drama--whether it be a sorority or otherwise. That's just part of life. If you cannot handle that, then being in a sorority is probably not for you, as sorority sisters do often have conflicts and disagreements.

3. Sororities are by nature exlusive organizations in that not every girl who participates in recruitment is going to be asked to be part of one. Again, if this is something you take issue with, it may not be for you.

4. Skimpy clothing is not exclusive to sorority members. If you think that it is, you have alot to learn about life before you join any sorority.

4a. Yes. It's a sorority, not the chain gang. Again, you can't be serious with how dense some of your questions sound.

5. This is your life and not theirs. The sorority a person joins has to be a good fit for THEM, not their parents, godparents, etc.

6. Again, this is your life.

7. Sororities are not cults full of women with the same beliefs and thoughts. Part of being in a sorority involves interacting with women who have DIFFERENT worldviews than you. If you are not prepared to do that, then a sorority is not for you.

8. JL varies by city and depending on where you live, miost of the JL members may be sorority alumnae, but there are also places where NO ONE in JL is a sorority member. It jusrt depends and you need not be a sorority alumna to join.

Bottom line: If all you want to do is talk about how intellectual and indivdual you are, and you are not interested in meeting new people who do not share your worldviews, you are better of NOT joining a sorority.

No sorority is going to be interested in someone who thinks this way about sorority members and sorority life.


Oh, my. I must say that I realize that I put some inappropriate comments in the first post, but I want to stress that after much thought I decided that complete honesty and openess (about myself and my reservations) would be the best course of action. I took for granted that people would assume that my spending time in a forum was an indication that I am interested in greek life and seek to be corrected about any misconceptions that I may have about sorority membership. What I did fail to do is to list the reasons that I am attracted to greek life:

1.) I have met many wonderful people at my school and some of the people that I respect the most are members of the sororities. I know multiple people in all of them whom I respect.

2.) I have been very impressed when I repeatedly see sorority members around town at volunteer events.

3.) Some of the nicest people on campus have been sorors. Often they have helped me out when I need help the most.

4.) I have repeatedly been impressed during group work and class presentations when sorors repeatedly demonstrate superb preparation that is consistently reflected in seamless, stellar presentations.

5.) I have seen sorors in crisis; and then I have seen their sisters come to their aid and try to rectify the situation. I found it endearing, admirable and very inspiring.

6.) There have been some instances when I have talked with a soror who was about to speak negatively about another and was stopped by her sister. I took note.

7.) When I am around sorors and the topic of their respective sororities come up, what they have to say is always positive.

I could go on, but I hope this suffices to say that the compassion, altruism, work ethic and love between sorors is something that has inspired me. I aspire to many of the attributes that they demonstrate.

When I ask seemingly negative questions, it is not because I subscribe to stereotypes, but because I want to hear how other greeks will respond to the questions. I expected that I would receive constructive criticism about some of the ignorant or misguided notions that I may have demonstrated. I will take KSUViolet06's comments and respond to them:

*On discretion: when I felt that I needed help I thought that an anonymous forum might be a way to ask people who don't know me for honest, open, direct advice. In order to get that type of advice I felt that I had to be very honest and open myself. It was not my intention to offend sensibilities.

1.) Thank you for your answer.

2.) I thought that I did state that I understood that there will be some "issues" along the way. I just wanted reassurance.

3.) Again, I thought that I did state that I understood and accepted this aspect of the system. If I was unclear I apologize.

4.) I phrased the question very unintelligently. Not very thoughtful of me in the least. I do understand that sorors are by no means anywhere near the worst offenders in this respect.

4a.) Again, an inelegant question. I also apologize for that one.

5.) Point taken. Like I said, I do find this aspect of my life to be something of note. I do not claim to always understand WASPs, even if I live with them.

6.) Again, this is another thing that I comes to mind for me when I think about greek life. I hope that you can understand this.

7.) I think I may have been misunderstood. I understand that one can only grow when one is exposed to different viewpoints. I was saying that I hope this is the case in sororities. I now assume that it is.

8.) Thank you for your answer.

Re: to "Bottom Line": "Intellectual" is a term that I do not like that is often applied to me by others. I do not think it is a thing of pride and realize that identifying oneself as such can be alienating. I am not sure how else to respond to this. I am interested in meeting diverse, thoughtful people and understand that such people can be found in sororities.

I do not have a negative view of sororities; in fact, I thought that the positive aspects of them would be taken for granted. I hope that I can be better understood after having written this.

Faithfully,

Me
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  #24  
Old 04-29-2009, 02:17 AM
KSUViolet06 KSUViolet06 is offline
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I'm really unsure why you felt that your response needed a separate thread when you have already posted it in other one.
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  #25  
Old 04-29-2009, 02:25 AM
myopicsunflower myopicsunflower is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BeOfService1rst View Post
Re: to "Bottom Line": "Intellectual" is a term that I do not like that is often applied to me by others. I do not think it is a thing of pride and realize that identifying oneself as such can be alienating. I am not sure how else to respond to this. I am interested in meeting diverse, thoughtful people and understand that such people can be found in sororities.
Wow. I find your view of intellectuals to be very unfortunate. I consider myself one, and I know many women in many sororities who are most certainly intellectuals -- their academic achievements are testaments to this. Most sororities strive to achieve as high a chapter GPA as possible -- having a high chapter GPA is a point of pride -- and support their sisters in their scholarly endeavors.

There is a big difference between an intellectual and someone who sequesters herself with her studies. From my experience with the latter type of person, such alienation is usually self-imposed.

Diverse people *can* be found in sororities. Diversity includes intellectuals.
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  #26  
Old 04-29-2009, 02:43 AM
baitandswitch baitandswitch is offline
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I'm actually in your situation. I'm an active brother in APO, and currently pledging a IFC fraternity. What I have found difficult is finding a balance between both of my commitments. I have made some sacrifices when there are conflicting events, so you will have to decide on where you want to spend most of your time. It is doable but you just have to manage your time very well and stay organized.
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  #27  
Old 04-29-2009, 04:14 AM
BeOfService1rst BeOfService1rst is offline
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When I hear the term "Intellectual" it smacks of elite overtones. I just consider myself a person. I really don't know what you are getting at. Please stop.
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  #28  
Old 04-29-2009, 04:30 AM
KSUViolet06 KSUViolet06 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BeOfService1rst View Post
When I hear the term "Intellectual" it smacks of elite overtones. I just consider myself a person. I really don't know what you are getting at. Please stop.

You know, there is a level of humility that has to come with seeking membership in any sorority. Maybe personality isn't best communicated via the internet, but from what I have read of your posts, you could stand to be a bit more humble.

You need to relax a little and stop being so concerned about whether the women in the sororities will be having conversations that are "intellectual" enough and just focus on geniunely attempting to get to know them.

I suppose what I'm trying to say is that if you plan on talking to sorority members in the same way you're typing in your posts online, you may have a hard time.

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Last edited by KSUViolet06; 04-29-2009 at 04:32 AM.
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  #29  
Old 04-29-2009, 06:46 AM
APhi4Ever APhi4Ever is offline
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Why did you feel the need to start a separate thread?
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  #30  
Old 04-29-2009, 06:49 AM
knight_shadow knight_shadow is offline
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The threads have been merged, so it doesn't really matter now.

Speaking of merged threads, why was the dual membership thread merged with this one?
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