Something like a prodigal daughter
 

First, a bit of background:

If I decide to rush, I will be doing so as a Junior. In my previous two years here at NorthEast Private College I have made it my business to recuperate from life at home by not observing any of the ettiquette that my family would have me. I will say that I have embraced a very extreme sense of individuality. Before coming back to school I took some years off, which I spent working and volunteering in New York. My travels (volunteering domestically and abroad) and experiences have made me extremely thoughtful (intellectual) in a non-nerdy sort of way. Nevertheless, I am often concerned when hearing viewpoints that I view as uninformed. I do my best not to seem too aloof or snobby (although admittedly, I have some part of these less-than-admirable traits) and think that people generally think of me as being "irreverent" and independent. I am an orphan who lives with her godparents and who, despite my pretensions, is deeply spiritual. I want to go into finance and hope to do a lot of philanthropy in my adult life. There are three sororities on my small campus: Kappa Kappa Gamma, Chi Omega and Sigma Kappa.

Now the issues:

1.) I am wondering whether rushing late will affect my prospects for a bid. I am not a transfer.

2.) I have a strong interest in philanthropy, but little interest in excessive BS and cattiness. Even if sisterhood is lacking, I want to avoid total disfunction.

3.) I understand and accept that some sororities are prestigious/exclusive, but want to be sure that I do not become involved in a culture of exclusion.

4.) I am not sure if I am ready to bare as much skin as some sorors around campus.

4a.) Will I be able to do anything by myself if I become a pledge?

5.) My godparents are WASPs and I don't want to somehow embarrass or offend them by my final choice of sorority.

6.) My biological family is historically Delta Sigma Theta (a black sorority) since the 1920's, but I have become interested in a particularly older "women's fraternity". Should I be concerned about forsaking this tradition?

7.) I like the idea of a prestigious sorority, but am concerned about the worldviews of some of my potential "sisters". I like to have intellectual conversations.

8.) There are strong expectations that I join the Junior League upon graduation (which I will) and I am wondering if there is some sorority that complements this tradition.

I am very interested in any suggestions about which sororities I might look at further.

*I am new to all of this and apologize if any of my concerns seem trivial, but would like to remind everyone that they are important to me. :)

Where's the Facebook "You like this." button when you need it?

Discretion is your friend. It was very easy for me to figure out which school you're talking about.

If you are legit - What with your "very extreme sense of individuality" and your laundry list of questions/reiteration of stereotypes, I don't think sorority life is for you.

If you think so poorly of sorority women, why would you want to become one?

Wow.

Co-sign - I think you'll be happiest working with philanthropic groups whose sole focus is good works. With the attitude you have shown in this post, I can't imagine any of the groups mentioned thinking you would be a positive addition to their sisterhood.

(Waiting for the "OMG if this is the attitude you show I don't know that I even WANT to join! response)

LOL :D

Co-sign.

In addition to the stereotyping, there has been a complete lack of discretion, including practically naming the school and providing enough specific details on herself that she would be easily known on that campus.

Cupcake, I fear that you have done yourself in. SWTx provides a great suggestion... consider service oriented groups. It is likely going to be your only option once sorority members from your campus see your post.

Just to throw this out there...your desire to avoid catiness and what have you is unrealistic. It is the nature of the beast in ANY college organization, but especially one run by and for your peers. It is simply how it works. What you COULD contribute is mediation skills to help defuse tensions like that, but expecting it to be drama and catiness free is very unrealistic. Even the best sisterhoods have hiccups of dysfunction, but what makes the best different from the rest, is that they move through that and come out stronger in their bonds..

Given the stereotypes and condescension in your post, I think you need to try harder, Babs. ;)

yep-sounds like sorority life is not for you-i don't think you would be happy having to conform to or consider what is good for the "group"-what with your admitted "extreme sense of individuality". nor do i think that you would be a good fit for junior league. as a league member, i know that the membership is most successful when we are working as a group toward a common goal-not as a mass of individuals doing our own thing.

i will say that i have known league members from each of the 26 npc sororities as well as the ladies of the divine 9 sororities and many, many league members who were not members of sororities at all. membership in a greek organization is not a prerequisite for league membership and no one group holds an advantage over another.

I'm surprised that with everything you claim to stand for, that no one in your family taught you anything about the concept of DISCRETION and not putting tons of info out about who you are over the internet. It's considered to be bad form and very inappropriate.


Your persistent stereotyping of a grgoup of women you obviously know nothing about is also VERY inappropriate.


Because I'm feeling a little nice today:

1. Depending on your school, not being a freshman student will negatively affect you.

2. Sorority women are human. With any group of females, there is bound to be drama--whether it be a sorority or otherwise. That's just part of life. If you cannot handle that, then being in a sorority is probably not for you, as sorority sisters do often have conflicts and disagreements.

3. Sororities are by nature exlusive organizations in that not every girl who participates in recruitment is going to be asked to be part of one. Again, if this is something you take issue with, it may not be for you.

4. Skimpy clothing is not exclusive to sorority members. If you think that it is, you have alot to learn about life before you join any sorority.

4a. Yes. It's a sorority, not the chain gang. Again, you can't be serious with how dense some of your questions sound.

5. This is your life and not theirs. The sorority a person joins has to be a good fit for THEM, not their parents, godparents, etc.

6. Again, this is your life.

7. Sororities are not cults full of women with the same beliefs and thoughts. Part of being in a sorority involves interacting with women who have DIFFERENT worldviews than you. If you are not prepared to do that, then a sorority is not for you.

8. JL varies by city and depending on where you live, miost of the JL members may be sorority alumnae, but there are also places where NO ONE in JL is a sorority member. It jusrt depends and you need not be a sorority alumna to join.

Bottom line: If all you want to do is talk about how intellectual and indivdual you are, and you are not interested in meeting new people who do not share your worldviews, you are better of NOT joining a sorority.

No sorority is going to be interested in someone who thinks this way about sorority members and sorority life.