Physical appearances you refuse to date. - Page 16

DrPhil · #**226** 03-15-2009, 08:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by libramunoz

Just look at your responses to people who are older than you! You are wanting to practically throw a temper tantrum because folks don't see things your way! That is the ACTION of a child!

I don't see where he is throwing a temper tantrum.

He's just typing from experience and standing behind what he knows to be true.

DaemonSeid · #**227** 03-15-2009, 08:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deltadevil

Off of clothing though? Why not just take a person seriously based on what they have to say or what they do instead of the clothing. Im tired of this "the clothing makes the man" mentality, but o well in time we will see if what you say turns out to be true.

Because LIFE DOESN'T WORK LIKE THAT...people's first reaction to you is your appearance...and if you look like a thug ESPECIALLY BEING A YOUNG BLACK MAN in this world, no one will give a damn about what degrees you have, who your family is, or what you know...all you look like is the rest of the other men that are either locvked up, in jail or never set foot on a college campus.

People your age always hollering about "reppin' where they is from" well guess what?

Part of that is based upon first impressions!

You are in college now to get a career in whatever it is you want to get a career in, right? Well the first step is knowing that you can't always do what you want or dress how YOU WANT. Or better yet, look like the average homey on the street. Between now and the time you graduate, you will really learn that you have to step up your game especially if you want to live 'real life'. There is nothing wrong with a suit, some nice shoes and some clean underwear man!

You just wait...but you know...I am not going to bust on you too much any more because you are still 19 and you still want to have your fun, but you need to start prepping yourself now while you can because sooner or later, that thug look ain't gonna be cool on you when you hit 30 or 40 and you are still sitting there with a degree and no job and wondering why girls named LaQuisha flipping burgers with you at Mickee Dee's are the only types attracted to you...

deltadevil · #**228** 03-15-2009, 08:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaemonSeid

19....

That says a lot right there.

I know there were some styles that my generation dressed in when I was your age that made people have some not so flattering comments...and trust I am really in no mood to have the whole saggy assed pants debate short of saying, I think it's tacky, it looks unclean, lazy and slovely.

But...you do you...remember this thread is about Physical appearances and I think most of the women made it abundantly clear that they do NOT like the style nor do they find it attactive.

Something else you may want to consider.

The caliber of women you attract when in baggy clothes vs the women you attract when dressed otherwise.

And don't even push the argument about clothes doesn't equal intelligence because I think we all know that BUT what your style you choose can also say something about WHO YOU ARE.

A suit is just a start...it's too many baggy panted brothas out here I see and know who don't even OWN a suit and the last time they wore one was either Easter, to a funeral or to their sentencing...think about it.

^^^ Amen bruh...that right there is truth.

Im not saying nothing is wrong with wearing a suit. I know you have to wear a suit to a job, interviews, and things of that nature, but why cant the person wear baggy clothes half of the time? Not baggy to the point where the top of the pants are under the butt, but baggy as in a little big with a belt on them.

libramunoz · #**229** 03-15-2009, 08:13 PM

Looking at it from my point of view I just see a temper tantrum being thrown in his defensiveness of not wanting to wear a tie and suit. To me, it just shows that he needs to grow a little.

DaemonSeid · #**230** 03-15-2009, 08:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Not even ties and suits, knowing casual and business casual styles of dress would suffice for many settings.

LOL. I have seen men wear baggy dress clothes to church.

As if their daily baggy routine was so awesome that it wouldn't be "keeping it real" to get over it for one day.

Gym shoes, Timbs, tshirts, and jeans are cool as long as you aren't recreating the hoodlum look. No one is saying that you have to feel stuffy in suits and trousers/slacks every day if your environments don't call for it.

Just know the difference or else you will be very limited in your social interactions and networking and career opportunities. You can still be black if you are upwardly mobile.

I got that Dave Chappelle skit running thru my head now...

"When keepin' it real goes wrong..."[

deltadevil · #**231** 03-15-2009, 08:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaemonSeid

Because LIFE DOESN'T WORK LIKE THAT...people's first reaction to you is your appearance...and if you look like a thug ESPECIALLY BEING A YOUNG BLACK MAN in this world, no one will give a damn about what degrees you have, who your family is, or what you know...all you look like is the rest of the other men that are either locvked up, in jail or never set foot on a college campus.

People your age always hollering about "reppin' where they is from" well guess what?

Part of that is based upon first impressions!

You are in college now to get a career in whatever it is you want to get a career in, right? Well the first step is knowing that you can't always do what you want or dress how YOU WANT. Or better yet, look like the average homey on the street. Between now and the time you graduate, you will really learn that you have to step up your game especially if you want to live 'real life'. There is nothing wrong with a suit, some nice shoes and some clean underwear man!

You just wait...but you know...I am not going to bust on you too much any more because you are still 19 and you still want to have your fun, but you need to start prepping yourself now while you can because sooner or later, that thug look ain't gonna be cool on you when you hit 30 or 40 and you are still sitting there with a degree and no job and wondering why girls named LaQuisha flipping burgers with you at Mickee Dee's are the only types attracted to you...

I'm mad that I laughed at that part. I see what you are saying though.

DaemonSeid · #**232** 03-15-2009, 08:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deltadevil

Im not saying nothing is wrong with wearing a suit. I know you have to wear a suit to a job, interviews, and things of that nature, but why cant the person wear baggy clothes half of the time? Not baggy to the point where the top of the pants are under the butt, but baggy as in a little big with a belt on them.

how about wearing a belt...period...why should we have to see your nasty assed underwear??

That's why they are called "UNDER-WEAR".

Emphasis on the UNDER

libramunoz · #**233** 03-15-2009, 08:18 PM

Because you need to understand that wearing the baggy pants actively reflects who you are as a person.

I know that at 19, you want to show who you are and where you're from, but baby boy, at a certain point, you have to learn how to step up for yourself.

It's the same as if I was 19 and went to school with you. We might be friends, but if you SAW me all the time in a hoochie mama pair of pants and tube top, you could know that I was the brightest of the bright, but eventually, even you would get tired of defending me to your homeys that contuied to call me a "ho" or a "hoochie" or a "stanky skank" or a "hood rat."

I'm sorry, but the way that you dress, this is the first impression that people have of you.

deltadevil · #**234** 03-15-2009, 08:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by libramunoz

It's true NOW!

Just look at your responses to people who are older than you! You are wanting to practically throw a temper tantrum because folks don't see things your way! That is the ACTION of a child!

Just like people have to take a "moment of reflection" or a "big girl/boy pill" it's time that you take your big boy pill right now!

You are on the verge of going into the---dare I say it---REAL WORLD! And I am SO sorry to burst your "happy bubble" but get with it son! You are judged by the WAY that you dress!

Simple fact of matter-get over it!

If you saw me now, you'd think this woman is sad, un happy, or just doesn't give a damn about the way that she dresses! And you'd be right with the last statement--I'm not working and so, I don't happen to dress in my work clothes for my daily living. However, when I am working, believe me, my clothes reflect that and people judge my ability to help them based on the way that I dress!

Get up, get a glass of water, take your big boy pill and stop whining about why you don't want to dress in a suit and tie!

How am i throwing a temper tantrum? I am just debating the issue with everybody who has a opinion. I havent cursed at anybody nor have I told them that everything they say is complete b.s.

DrPhil · #**235** 03-15-2009, 08:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deltadevil

Not baggy to the point where the top of the pants are under the butt, but baggy as in a little big with a belt on them.

Now you're backing down.

If this was just about men wanting their scrotum to breathe, we wouldn't be where we are in this discussion.

libramunoz · #**236** 03-15-2009, 08:22 PM

No you haven't, however, the way that you were responding was a reflection of the attitude that you were feeling.

Baby boy, it's just about being able to grow up. We all have to have some reminders from time to time.

It's just about being able to have a reality check with ourselves.

deltadevil · #**237** 03-15-2009, 08:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Now you're backing down.

If this was just about men wanting their scrotum to breathe, we wouldn't be where we are in this discussion.

No I am not backing down. That is how i wear my jeans. Maybe its the fact that I dont have a job or run one but, I dont really care how low anybody wears their pants because they have the right to do whatever they want long as its not hurting the next person

libramunoz · #**238** 03-15-2009, 08:25 PM

Sweetie, don't let LaQuisha or Tarlisha, or LaNeptuna be the only one that you can attract based on your appearance. If you want to date and be with Candise or Katherine, or even LaJolla, have it based on a good reflection of dress and style.

DaemonSeid · #**239** 03-15-2009, 08:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by libramunoz

Sweetie, don't let LaQuisha or Tarlisha, or LaNeptuna be the only one that you can attract based on your appearance. If you want to date and be with Candise or Katherine, or even LaJolla, have it based on a good reflection of dress and style.

even if he wants to date the first 3 at least have them be at the same (or higher) points in life as he is.

DrPhil · #**240** 03-15-2009, 08:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deltadevil

No I am not backing down. That is how i wear my jeans. Maybe its the fact that I dont have a job or run one but, I dont really care how low anybody wears their pants because they have the right to do whatever they want long as its not hurting the next person

The good thing is that this isn't really about you.

And we aren't talking about men who simply want to be able to breathe in their clothes.

We're talking about what is interpreted as a hoodlum trend. That's what you were initially talking about but now you're backing down from that.

You're 19 and surrounded by people who look like YOU. Of course you wouldn't care. This thread isn't about whether you would date a saggy pants man, anyway.