ROOMMATE CONFLICT - Help!

[DaemonSeid]

Originally Posted by sherryanne

Yes, on-campus housing, but guests are allowed. I guess I'll have to confront her again...

I was afraid that if I told her now, she was going to forget when we come back. But forget that silly thought. Thanks guys!

So why did you ask us?


People don't forget shyte like that...are you scared of her? Is she bigger than you or sumn?

sheesh

[KSUViolet06]

Get off of the internet and confront her about it.

[33girl]

Did you ask to be in a limited visitation/no overnight visitors dorm and got stuck where you are now?

If you don't ever want any male overnight guests in your room - for your roommate OR you - then talk to the housing poobah and see if you can switch to a limited visitation dorm next semester. There's probably someone in the limited vis dorm who's miserable and would take your place in a minute.

It sounds like she's being inconsiderate, but if you are in a dorm where overnight guests ARE allowed, for you to tell your roommate you are refusing to follow dorm policy is inconsiderate as well.

If you go to one of those hippie colleges where everything is 24 hour visitation, again, talk to the housing poobah and see if you can be matched with a more like-minded roommate.

[PANTHERTEKE]

Originally Posted by 33girl

If you go to one of those hippie colleges where everything is 24 hour visitation, again, talk to the housing poobah and see if you can be matched with a more like-minded roommate.

I never knew anything but 24 hour visitations dorms still existed.

Had that not been the case at my school I don't know where I would've spent many drunken nights.

[BabyPiNK_FL]

^^^I'm thinking the same thing. I didn't know there was an option of living anywhere that people who don't live there can't be! Welcome to Miami, I guess!

[DSTRen13]

I never knew GT was "hippie college" ... I'm so proud

[KappaKittyCat]

Originally Posted by sherryanne

both of us knew each other before we became roommate, and I don't want this to tear our friendship.

It will. Bottom line: you can't have a friend that you live with in such close quarters and NOT have it affect your friendship. I roomed with a close friend our sophomore year and it did change our friendship. We're not as close anymore.

She's violating your space. She's taking advantage of your friendship. She's breaking an agreement the two of you made. And she will continue to do so until you put your foot down.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by sherryanne

She is bigger than me, but that's not the point... both of us knew each other before we became roommate, and I don't want this to tear our friendship.

Did you tell her BEFORE you signed up and made the decision to become roommates (which I'm assuming was last spring) that you didn't want overnight visitors? "The beginning of the year" sounds to me like she walked in the first day in September and you flipped the script. If a person I was friends with did that to me, not only would I be pretty pissed, but I'd probably say forget you and do exactly what your roommate is doing.

You can't just assume someone is going to think and behave the same way you do, even if you were friends with them before.

Originally Posted by KappaKittyCat

She's breaking an agreement the two of you made.

Originally Posted by sherryanne

I'll keep this story short. Basically, at the beginning of the year, I told my roommate that no boys are allowed in the room overnight

That doesn't sound to me like "an agreement the two of [them] made." It sounds like something one person said and expected the other to follow with no compromise or discussion.

[jojapeach]

Originally Posted by sherryanne

She is bigger than me, but that's not the point... both of us knew each other before we became roommate, and I don't want this to tear our friendship.

Why are you so worried about tearing the friendship when it's obvious that your roommate isn't as concerned? If she were concerned, she might have already come to you and said, "We've got to talk about this no visitors thing."

Regardless, your friendship will experience tension over this, but you have to confront this (and then wish her a Merry Chrismahanukwanzaakuh or whatever she celebrates). I hope you've done it by now.

[Thetagirl218]

Originally Posted by PANTHERTEKE

I never knew anything but 24 hour visitations dorms still existed.

Had that not been the case at my school I don't know where I would've spent many drunken nights.

Apparently, UNF is not as open minded as FIU.....I know several people who got in big trouble with campus housing because they had guests over with out going through proper procedures....of course those people never said anything to their roomies and the roomies got pissed and reported them....otherwise it was usually alright...

sherryanne, I would talk with her and if that doesn't work then speak to your RA. You pay for part of the room and if you don't feel comfortable with the boy around then say something!

[cheerfulgreek]

Originally Posted by DaemonSeid

So why did you ask us?


People don't forget shyte like that...are you scared of her? Is she bigger than you or sumn?

sheesh

lol lol

I was going to say tell her now, but I guess I'm a little late.