How important is family background to you?

[cheerfulgreek]

Originally Posted by alphagamzetagam

My boyfriend (live-in) and I have both separate checking and savings accounts, then a joint account to pay bills with. I can imagine that if (and when) we do get married, we'll slim it down to one joint savings, one joint checking, and two separate checking accounts. Sometimes it's good to have a little mad money that's just yours, as long as the bulk of your income goes to the household.

Everyone is different, but I disagree. I mean, a live in is different from a marriage partner. I don't think there's anything wrong with living together, but it still isn't a marriage. You can still have a little spending money after all of the bills are paid from one account. If you set a budget and follow it I don't see why separate accounts are necessary. It's just that being married with two separate accounts says to me that we're still separate. It should only be one account. Why even get married if you're still going to be doing things the way you were doing them when you weren't married?

[33girl]

Originally Posted by cheerfulgreek

Everyone is different, but I disagree. I mean, a live in is different from a marriage partner. I don't think there's anything wrong with living together, but it still isn't a marriage. You can still have a little spending money after all of the bills are paid from one account. If you set a budget and follow it I don't see why separate accounts are necessary. It's just that being married with two separate accounts says to me that we're still separate. It should only be one account. Why even get married if you're still going to be doing things the way you were doing them when you weren't married?

If you travel a lot for business and use a debit card instead of credit cards.

If your spouse is a control freak. (Some people just ARE and it's nothing personal to the other person.)

If it's in the details of the prenup.

The days of putting money in the cookie jar for the little woman to "run the house" with are LONG gone. Most people just don't have lives like that anymore. Picture it: you're off for a business trip and your hubby is at home. Out of the blue his car breaks down, and you have to pay for dinner and a hotel room on your trip. Sometimes there isn't enough in the account to cover that and someone is going to bounce.

[Munchkin03]

Originally Posted by 33girl

If you travel a lot for business and use a debit card instead of credit cards.

If your spouse is a control freak. (Some people just ARE and it's nothing personal to the other person.)

If it's in the details of the prenup.

The days of putting money in the cookie jar for the little woman to "run the house" with are LONG gone. Most people just don't have lives like that anymore. Picture it: you're off for a business trip and your hubby is at home. Out of the blue his car breaks down, and you have to pay for dinner and a hotel room on your trip. Sometimes there isn't enough in the account to cover that and someone is going to bounce.

I think that model is really outdated. Heck, my mother stayed at home the entire time we were growing up, and she's always had a savings and checking separate from the "house" account. Granted, she had her own income from her artwork. But, still.

I honestly don't understand the whole "credit cards are evil" thing. Like anything else, you abuse them, and they'll abuse you right back. But, if you travel for business or require reimbursements on a regular basis, you almost have to have a credit card. Hell, get an Amex where you have to pay it off each month in full if you really don't want to deal with a typical "credit card."

[33girl]

Originally Posted by Munchkin03

I honestly don't understand the whole "credit cards are evil" thing. Like anything else, you abuse them, and they'll abuse you right back. But, if you travel for business or require reimbursements on a regular basis, you almost have to have a credit card. Hell, get an Amex where you have to pay it off each month in full if you really don't want to deal with a typical "credit card."

Oh, I agree that you should be able to manage a credit card. But some people CAN'T, or don't want to. That's their prerogative. I was just giving some examples of why a married couple would maintain separate accounts.

[Munchkin03]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Oh, I agree that you should be able to manage a credit card. But some people CAN'T, or don't want to. That's their prerogative. I was just giving some examples of why a married couple would maintain separate accounts.

Oh, I was agreeing with you! I gave an example of a married couple with separate bank accounts to further drive it home. Then I went on my pro-credit card rant.

[agzg]

Originally Posted by cheerfulgreek

Why even get married if you're still going to be doing things the way you were doing them when you weren't married?

I don't think banking is the reason why a couple should get married or that it should be a cause of contention between couples. There are still other reasons besides "we wanna live together" and "we wanna share money." For example, being able to cover one another under health insurance, being able to be with one another and to make decisions for each other (if need be) in the hospital, being able to inherit property without a will, etc.

There should be a difference between "share our lives" and "share our bank account." Like I said before, as long as the bulk of our income is going toward the household, I don't see why it should be a problem.

I'm confident that once we can afford a small wedding and the stuff that goes into it without throwing ourselves into debt, we will be getting married.

[RU OX Alum]

Originally Posted by alphagamzetagam

I don't think banking is the reason why a couple should get married or that it should be a cause of contention between couples.

...

I'm confident that once we can afford a small wedding and the stuff that goes into it without throwing ourselves into debt, we will be getting married.

I think you are right on about this. I already know a few couples that married before they were really ready, and then poof, marriage ended in a year or so. I hate seeing that. It's usually because they don't have enough life expeirence on their own and I really do wish more people my age would put off marriage until they are a bit more mature and sound, both emotionally and financially.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by alphagamzetagam

There should be a difference between "share our lives" and "share our bank account." Like I said before, as long as the bulk of our income is going toward the household, I don't see why it should be a problem.

Exactly.