Question for parents, parents to be, and parent want to be's.....

[KSigkid]

Originally Posted by kstar

Honestly, I gave this a lot of thought. IF (big if) I ever had children, I don't think that dying/terminal illness would be the worst thing. I mean, yes, tragic and would probably require a lot of grief counseling.

However, the most devastating thing that a child could do would be more like if they were going against every value I would have taught them, like being a Republican, a Scientologist, or committing a crime. Something about those things just makes me... I dunno, it was like when I found out that one of my childhood friends was a Republican, I was so disappointed and heartbroken that she and I would never be friends again.

Wow...just wow. Glad to hear you practice intolerance for other viewpoints.

[KSUViolet06]

As far as secrets go:

*That he/she was being abused by a partner or something and not telling me.

*That he/she had been abused by someone as a kid but never told me.

*That he/she had gotten involved with drugs, prostitution or something.

*That he or she was gay/lesbian and didn't tell me because she thought I'd be upset. Not that being gay in itself would devastate me, but I just want my kids to be able to come to me and not have to hide stuff like that out of fear. .

[ThetaPrincess24]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

.

*That he or she was gay/lesbian and didn't tell me because she thought I'd be upset. Not that being gay in itself would devastate me, but I just want my kids to be able to come to me and not have to hide stuff like that out of fear. .

I agree with this one. I wouldnt agree with that lifestyle but I would hope that they wouldnt think they would be unloved or disowned by that. There are much mroe serious issues/situations to worry about than that. For example, I'd rather them tell me they were gay instead of telling me they were dying.

[christiangirl]

Originally Posted by ThetaPrincess24

I agree with this one. I wouldnt agree with that lifestyle but I would hope that they wouldnt think they would be unloved or disowned by that. There are much mroe serious issues/situations to worry about than that. For example, I'd rather them tell me they were gay instead of telling me they were dying.

Ditto!

[kstar]

Originally Posted by KSigkid

Wow...just wow. Glad to hear you practice intolerance for other viewpoints.

You're saying that it wouldn't be utterly devastating for your child to turn their back on every value that you hold dear?

Originally Posted by MysticCat

You can't be friends with a Republican?!

It would be worse to see your child become a Republican than to see your child suffer from a terrible illness or die?! Because, heaven forbid, you should raise a child to think for him- or herself.

See above. "I have casual acquaintances, like school/work friends, that don't agree with me, but no, I don't really want to have close friends that don't share my values. Is that really that hard to understand?"

I wouldn't expect any one to agree with me on every point, but I think that part of raising a kid would be instilling the values that you hold most dear, such as equal rights for all (how many repubs voted against prop 8?), there is only one G*d (and you have to admit that Scientology started as a bet, and is more of a cult/money scheme than a religion)... It was asked what would be most devastating to you. And grief counseling can do a world of good, but this is something that I don't think I could get over and respect them as a person again.

[epchick]

Originally Posted by kstar

I have casual acquaintances, like school/work friends, that don't agree with me, but no, I don't really want to have close friends that don't share my values. Is that really that hard to understand?"

Actually yes it is that hard to understand.

Originally Posted by kstar

...such as equal rights for all (how many repubs voted against prop 8?)...

And do you know how many democrats voted "yes" on prop 8? I bet you it's a whole hell of a lot more than you think it is.

Yeah, you have some skewed logic if you think that republicans don't want equal rights for everyone.

[christiangirl]

Originally Posted by epchick

And do you know how many democrats voted "yes" on prop 8? I bet you it's a whole hell of a lot more than you think it is.

I didn't really think about this, but yeah...there's definitely not enough Republicans in California to pass that thing on their own. Hmmmm.....

[epchick]

Originally Posted by christiangirl

I didn't really think about this, but yeah...there's definitely not enough Republicans in California to pass that thing on their own. Hmmmm.....

I think there is enough Republicans in California, but you can't say all 5 million people that voted "yes" on prop 8 were Republican.

If you go by the logic of CNN & other news stations, the African-American vote pushed "yes on prop 8" over the edge. Of all the African-American I know, only one is republican (and she voted "no"). Many African-American are democrats, which would mean that MANY of the ~500,000 votes (that was the difference between yes & no) were democratic votes.

[christiangirl]

Originally Posted by epchick

I think there is enough Republicans in California, but you can't say all 5 million people that voted "yes" on prop 8 were Republican.

If you go by the logic of CNN & other news stations, the African-American vote pushed "yes on prop 8" over the edge. Of all the African-American I know, only one is republican (and she voted "no"). Many African-American are democrats, which would mean that MANY of the ~500,000 votes (that was the difference between yes & no) were democratic votes.

That's true. However, it's not just the Af-Ams...Latinos, Christians, and married people were in on it, too:

California's black and Latino voters, who turned out in droves for Barack Obama, also provided key support in favor of the state's same-sex marriage ban. Seven in 10 black voters backed a successful ballot measure to overturn the California Supreme Court's May decision allowing same-sex marriage, according to exit polls for The Associated Press.

More than half of Latino voters supported Proposition 8, while whites were split. Religious groups led the tightly organized campaign for the measure, and religious voters were decisive in getting it passed. Of the seven in 10 voters who described themselves as Christian, two-thirds backed the initiative. Married voters and voters with children strongly supported Proposition 8. Unmarried voters were heavily opposed.

http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/lano...african-a.html

[epchick]

Originally Posted by christiangirl

That's true. However, it's not just the Af-Ams...Latinos, Christians, and married people were in on it, too:



http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/lano...african-a.html

Oh I totally know it wasn't just Af-Ams, I was just going by the "logic" of CNN & other news stations that had claimed it was the Af-Ams vote.

[KSigkid]

Originally Posted by kstar

You're saying that it wouldn't be utterly devastating for your child to turn their back on every value that you hold dear?

You're generalizing quite a bit - just because someone is a member of a political party doesn't mean that they ascribe to every value of that party's platform.
For example, I'm a Republican who also happens to be pro-choice and anti-death penalty. I know Democrats who are pro-death penalty and/or anti-gay marriage.

You may want to be more open-minded on things - life isn't so black and white, especially when it comes to politics.

It would be more devastating for me to hear that a parent would essentially disown their child for joining the "wrong" party.

[christiangirl]

Originally Posted by KSigkid

...just because someone is a member of a political party doesn't mean that they ascribe to every value of that party's platform.