bid day - regrets?

KSUViolet06 · #1 10-17-2008, 12:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PJS

The one time I have seen the hurt last longer is when the PNM has a biological sister in the house or very recently graduated. It also stings again at special times like initiation.

True. I haven't seen this happen with my particular chapter, but I had a friend in another sorority whose younger sister went through recruitment. Big Sister was a senior, so Younger Sister spent her HS years coming to XYZ for Little Sibs weekend, Parents Weekend, etc. It was one of those situations where I think it was assumed between the two of them that Younger Sis would go XYZ. Younger Sister even knew which room in XYZ she wanted to have when she lived in.

Come recruitment time, Younger Sister was cut by XYZ. She got a bid elsewhere, but on Bid Day you could tell that she was upset. I remember seeing Big Sister and she looked quite upset also. Little Sister ended up depledging her sorority shortly after recruitment.

Big Sister was so upset by this that after recruitment, she went early alum [or whatever her sorority calls it]. She didn't mind telling people why when they asked either.

gee_ess · #2 10-17-2008, 09:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

Come recruitment time, Younger Sister was cut by XYZ. She got a bid elsewhere, but on Bid Day you could tell that she was upset. I remember seeing Big Sister and she looked quite upset also. Little Sister ended up depledging her sorority shortly after recruitment.

Wow, that must have been some discussion that resulted in releasing an inhouse sister! I can only imagine the MS session that resulted in the release, and I shudder to think what the recruitment advisor had to deal with behind closed doors!

alphagamgirl06 · #3 10-17-2008, 11:45 AM

It is a little sad but we have to focus on the girls who wanted us so it is her lost and we wish her the best. Whats worst is when on pref night a girl tells us that she really likes our chapter and she felt that she could really fit in with us, then on Bid Day she gets a bid but doesnt accept it. That really sucks.

Leslie Anne · #4 10-17-2008, 12:29 PM

As most have said, we usually get over any disappointment pretty quickly. Once in a while some girls can get really bent outta shape though.

On my bid day, the girl who took me through pref at the house I didn't choose came to my dorm room to ask what happened. It was very uncomfortable.

One of my friends got dirty looks for weeks from a few girls whose house she didn't choose. (which only convinced her she made the right decision)

I think these are pretty rare cases though. It's usually all good.

breathesgelatin · #5 10-17-2008, 10:50 PM

Maybe this is a function of deferred recruitment, but I feel like sometimes for me in college the hurt lasted a few weeks after recruitment. Because I felt like I really, really knew these girls because I'd been hanging out with them for an entire semester and then you pref them and then it's like... they reject you. And a lot of times at my school when a rush crush pledged another group, it really was the end of the friendship, or at least the friendship changed. Yeah, yeah, you can be friends with anyone in any sorority, blah, blah, blah, but it's just never the same again.

I was lucky that my number one rush crush of all time (who was also a legacy) didn't go to my house on pref night so I was spared the agony of seeing her come to pref night and then not pledge Pi Phi.

KSUViolet06 · #6 10-17-2008, 11:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by breathesgelatin

Maybe this is a function of deferred recruitment, but I feel like sometimes for me in college the hurt lasted a few weeks after recruitment. Because I felt like I really, really knew these girls because I'd been hanging out with them for an entire semester.

I agree that I think this a deferred recruitment thing. At my school, we have recruitment in September, so really you've only known these girls for like 3 weeks maybe, and we know that a PNM who says she "could really see herself here" really hasn't been in school that long, doesn't know us THAT well, and is probably going to change her mind at some point during recruitment. So it's not totally crushing when a PNM either drops us or prefs us ends up elsewhere. The rejection stings more when you feel like you've gotten to know a PNM all semester, she's your friend, and she seems interested.

Also, with my school, the culture is such that girls have good friends who pledged different sororities. Not every school is like that, and essentially once a PNM pledges another chapter, you really aren't going to be friends like you were before recruitment.