Question on Rushing in my 30s (Fraternity)

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by Kato

Everyone has labels attached to them that aren't accurate or true. I've had worse than "lecher" just serving my country. I would gladly take the Dazed&Confused example over "uneducated simpleton", "man whore" or very occasionally "murderer" which I had to unfairly wear over the past few years simply due to my occupation.

The ignorance and callousness of some people astounds me. I'm sorry you've had to deal with that, and like others, I thank you for your service.

This thread has brought some family and historical perspective to mind for me. My father pledged Kappa Sigma as a married man. He was home from WWII, newly-married to my mother and newly-returned to college. (He had left The Citadel prior to graduation in order to enlist.)

Of course, times were different then -- based on what he and my mother told me, I would hazard a guess that many if not most of his brothers were also vets who had gone back to school after the war, so there was a different dynamic. But I know he was glad to have been able to experience that side of college life, and I know my mother (who had gone to a college without Greek life) was glad for him and supportive. As was common at the time, he gave her his badge, which she still has.

Good luck to you! It sounds like you've got a good perspective going into things and know what questions to ask and what to be careful about.

[33girl]

Here's a question - are there IFC fraternities at UW that aren't quite as "social"? I mean, there are groups who have 3 intramural teams, 3 mixers every week, super participate in everything - then there are groups who aren't so much. Maybe you just need to find a less "gung ho" fraternity.

I mean, you don't want to join a group of losers, but at your age, I'm not sure that winning the intergreek basketball championship is that big of a deal.

[srmom]

Kato,

That picture with the flag just totally won me over!!! You seem like a great guy with a great attitude, and as a mom of a fraternity member, I think you would be a great role model for the group. I hope that you can find a house that will overlook the "married, older guy" label and instead see the "head on straight, mature outlook and perspective guy" label.

You can just be the token - Old Guy (just kidding!)

Good luck!

[AlphaXi_Husky]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Here's a question - are there IFC fraternities at UW that aren't quite as "social"? I mean, there are groups who have 3 intramural teams, 3 mixers every week, super participate in everything - then there are groups who aren't so much. Maybe you just need to find a less "gung ho" fraternity.

I mean, you don't want to join a group of losers, but at your age, I'm not sure that winning the intergreek basketball championship is that big of a deal.

UW has a large range of fraternities, several of which have colonized or recolonized in the past couple of years. While I have not been a collegiate for a while there, I would venture to say that of the 30+ fraternities that are at UW you should be able to find one that's a match for you, and you a match for it. If you haven't already, check out the UW IFC website here

Good luck to you!

[KAPital PHINUst]

Originally Posted by lucgreek

Just my two cents but:

(This portion isn't meant to inflame or anger anyone, it's just what I have been exposed to/heard about/know of the APO at my school. Again, organizations differ by school, so take this as what they are considered at my school.)

First and foremost, at my school, APO is considered a club (by the school and by the students), just like a professional GLO. They don't sit on any sort of fraternity or sorority board, thusly I do not consider them a fraternity. Just because you call yourself a fraternity does not automatically make it so.

Also, APO at my university has more drama, bullshit, and members that dislike each other than any social fraternity/sorority (There was a case of several people deactivating because one of their friends didn't get elected president, along with cases of members openly disliking other ones and bashing them. I've also had a friend who kicked her own APO members out of a party she was having because they were talking shit). Take that as you will. My friends in APO feel much less a sense of belonging to a whole than I do with my social fraternity, I've been repeatedly told by so many people that they do it for their resume (and that's how they recruit on campus, just as a resume builder). And again, at my school as long as you do your APO services hours you get in.

But back to the original poster's question!

I don't know the fraternities where you are going, but it really depends. Speaking honestly, I don't know if you would have a lot in common with your undergrad pledge brothers and other potential brothers. That's the key thing I look for when considering people at rush events, whether or not they get along and whether they would fit.

Also, would you be willing to go to all the events that are undoubtedly required of you? Because you're over 30, I don't know if going to sorority mixers would even interest you. Would you be willing to do the undoubted bitch work of cleaning up after a party or mixer?

If you were rushing at my school, I would have to see how you bonded with everyone, especially the newest members just because if you don't really bond or have things in common with them, you probably won't spend time with your pledge class.

Honestly, I, personally, don't think I would pledge at your age, just because of the sheer amount of bitch work and 'paying your dues' you have to do as a pledge.

You have just perfectly made my case of why I prefer all-male chapters of APO over co-ed chapters.

Originally Posted by KAPital PHINUst

You have just perfectly made my case of why I prefer all-male chapters of APO over co-ed chapters.

Nobody asked you.

[CrackerBarrel]

Originally Posted by OTW

Nobody asked you.

Or wanted another conversation about non-social fraternities. OP already established (as everyone with their eyes open already knew) that social fraternities were the topic at hand.

[nate2512]

Originally Posted by OTW

Nobody asked you.

And since when do you control GC?

Originally Posted by nate2512

And since when do you control GC?

Since December 2000.

[Senusret I]

Originally Posted by OTW

Since December 2000.

Originally Posted by Senusret I

FWIW, my comment to Rainman has nothing to do with social vs. service GLO debate in this thread, but rather his d-baggery in several NPHC and APO threads.

[Senusret I]

Originally Posted by OTW

FWIW, my comment to Rainman has nothing to do with social vs. service GLO debate in this thread, but rather his d-baggery in several NPHC and APO threads.

several = all

Originally Posted by Senusret I

several = all

See, I was trying to be nice by saying "several", but you are right.

[KAPital PHINUst]

Originally Posted by OTW

Nobody asked you.

Nor did I need your (or anyone else's) permission either.

[KAPital PHINUst]

Originally Posted by OTW

FWIW, my comment to Rainman has nothing to do with social vs. service GLO debate in this thread, but rather his d-baggery in several NPHC and APO threads.

If you got beef with my posts, just start a new thread and say you got beef, rather than be a smart@$$ about it.

I don't get in your way, heck after all these years I really don't post anything to you or at you FWIW, so don't come at me all greasy. Come at me correctly or don't come at all. Kthanx.