Is it still cheating?

[Bluetiful]

Originally Posted by DaemonSeid

If you found out your significant other had pics of 'friends' in sexually explicit poses on their phone or PC, would you still say that they are cheating?

Even if they had never slept with them (and you buy it,) is it still a sign?

How would you hande it?

I dont' buy it that he never slept with her/them if he has these pics on his cell phone AND his PC. Real female friends don't do stupid sh*t like send naked pics of themselves to a guy they are and always have been in a strictly platonic relationship with. That's just stupid.

Now, I have noticed that men use the term "friend" very loosely. A friend could be just a friend - someone they have never slept with but get along great with like brother/sister. Girlfriends are usually introduced to these friends. A friend could also be an ex. A friend could also be the chick he met at the bar last night. He could tell you it's a "friend" and mean any of the above. In his mind, he's not really lying lol He's just not telling you the whole story. My point is that I think that his "friend/s" who sent him inappropriate pics is probably someone he slept with at one point. Let's hope it happened in the past and not while he was with you. (That would be cheating and I say leave.) Then stupidly enough, he still has the pics.

BTW, you may want to check to see when those pics were sent to his cell phone. I can check the 'details' of my pics on my cell phone. It gives me dates and times of when they were either taken or sent to me. Those dates would tell you if they were sent while he was with you. That's a problem even if he has never slept with her (which I already said I don't believe). If you choose to believe it though, I would agree with IlovemyAKA in that he needs to put her in her place (not you). Then you have to ask yourself if you really want to be with a guy who didn't say anything to her on his own in the first place? A guy like this may not understand the concept of boundaries and the next time it could be a lot worse than a pic.

Let's assume that he slept with her/them before he met me and I wanted to stay with him after all this. Here's what I would do - delete them. I wouldn't even address it with him. I would just hit delete, delete, delete. Then I would wait for him to approach me about it. If he did, I would admit to everything and explain why I did it and why those pics bugged me so much. Assuming he slept with her/them in the past and didn't want to hurt my feelings by telling me he did, I would address the importance of honest communication. I would expect him to play the violation of privacy card because that is exaclty what I would be doing if I went on his PC and deleted his pics. Since I would admit to everything, I would take responsibility for my inappropriateness and see if he takes responsibility for his. If he gets so caught up on my inappropriateness, that he won't even address his inappropriateness, then there's your ansnwer. He's not worth it and move on.