Discouraging Someone From Rushing

[DSTRen13]

My husband was a geek in high school. He was still a geek in college, and is still a geek now. And he loves his fraternity

[sigmaceli]

And on the geeky note: I know a guy who was pretty geeky in high school. Short, skinny, looked like his grade level was actually his age, a bit in his popular older brother's shadow. He went to college, grew about 8 inches or something ridiculous like that, changed his hair, and became very confident. He's now pretty popular, very attractive, and I have the good fortune of being the person that gets to marry him.

People change after high school.

Well said! Can I just say that's a GREAT story?

To my point...Coming from someone who was the awkward, shy and geeky girl in high school, college is a different monster entirely! I've come out of my shell and become a better, stronger woman because of my Sisters and their faith in me. We took a chance on each other, and I'm glad I've had such a great experience.

Likewise, my boyfriend is painfully shy, has a dry sense of humor and can be just as awkward as I was. And now, he's the vice president of his pledge class! There's a home for everyone in Greek life.

[lilzetakitten]

Thank you!

[violetpretty]

Originally Posted by lilzetakitten

I was released from recruitment the first time I went through. It was very painful and very humiliating. But I can tell you, with complete certainty, that it would have been so much worse to have a friend or family member tell me "Don't even try. There's no way you're going to get in."

Originally Posted by MysticCat

Being rejected by strangers wouldn't be nearly as painful as knowing that his brother's new wife thinks "he is the type of guy you would fix up your roommate with for the April Fools Day dance."

Exactly.

Besides, while the SIL might be an expert on her alma mater, this guy doesn't know where he is going to school yet. The Greek community at his school could be completely different. I can assure you that a guy like you described would have a good chance at getting a bid at my alma mater. Effeminate voice and a little nerdy? There are some fraternities at my alma mater with openly gay men! (Of course effeminate voice =/= gay and gay =/= effeminate voice, but it could be an assumption of some people.) And let me tell you, I have met some nerdy guys in fraternities. I usually become friends with them.