Which sorority was your Rho Chi in?

[DGTess]

Originally Posted by violetpretty

I will agree that the release figure method (RFM, which is what I am assuming is what you despise) can and often does encourage shallow membership selection, particularly with "popular" chapters.

IMO, all the more reason to prohibit rush until Spring semester, when the rushee has had a chance to see the chapters in action (classes, homecoming, football, extracurricular activities) and meet many of the sisters. By then she has a much better idea of which houses are closest in general culture to her temperament, and can choose which to attend.

A Rho Gamma's job (and PHA's job) is not to make PNMs' decisions for them, but to encourage them to get more information (i.e. don't drop out early) before making a decision, and to make sure they understand the consequences of their decision.

Why shouldn't she drop out early? There's next year if she changes her mind, and if she regrets the decision, well, it was her decision.

I am so glad that my Rho Gamma "spoon fed" me in encouraging me to attend preference after being crushed for being cut from a chapter that I wouldn't have fit in anyway.

We differ there. I've always hated being spoon fed.

At some schools, if a PNM does something stupid, she may have seriously damaged her chances to go Greek, if that's what she still wants.

As I said, we all live with bad decisions. It's her decision.

Rho Gammas are also vital in large recruitments if for nothing other than administrative purposes.

Administration is different. Nor should a woman have to hide her affiliation to help with administration.

I had a PNM in my group tell me that she was torn between my chapter and another chapter. Do you think she would have felt comfortable telling me that if she knew my affiliation?

No. I would have expected her to find someone from another chapter to speak with. There is more than one woman in this role, is there not?

And if there is only one, well, someone on one of the recruitment threads likened rush to job interviews. To me, that's yet another reason not to hide affiliation. You don't always get to talk to the person you want to; sometimes you have to talk to the person in the role.

I understand Panhellenic's interest is to have as many women as possible in each chapter. They want to ensure economic viability for a chapter, and garner as much in dues as possible. They believe each chapter should be equally strong. I disagree.

I also think deferred rush with no hiding affiliations is better at doing away with perceptions of "more popular" houses. Once a woman has had a chance to see the houses and how its sisters relate, she will select the one right for her, not the one someone else sees as popular.

Of course, that's a concept I've never understood. How can a woman who comes to campus and rushes the first week, before classes start, possibly know which ones are considered "popular"?

Now I'll grant there's a lot I don't know about big rush. I do know enough that I have no interest in learning more. What I have seen, in the times I've been advisor to chapters, is enough to make me stay away from rush forever.

[violetpretty]

Originally Posted by DGTess

Why shouldn't she drop out early? There's next year if she changes her mind, and if she regrets the decision, well, it was her decision.

As I said, we all live with bad decisions. It's her decision.

Well of course, it's the PNM's decision! Like I said before, they ARE adults, and they are capable of making their own decisions!

Say a PNM comes up to you and says she's dropping out after being dissatisfied with her schedule. I gather you'd be like,"Ok". I would tell the PNM that she has nothing to lose because she might like a chapter that she was only lukewarm about before, etc etc. to give her reasons to stick it out, but of course in no way force her. It's just information. If someone can warn you about making a [potentially] bad decision, you'd appreciate it, right?

I'd liken it to someone telling a teenager to use a condom. You could "let them live with the consequences" without saying a word and let them maybe get pregnant or an STD, or you can explain why using a condom is a good idea. No one can force the teen to use a condom, but information never hurt anyone. If the teen thought that nothing bad could happen while having unprotected sex, then the warning was definitely worth it if they decide to use the condom.

(Disclaimer: I am not implying that dropping out thus potentially ruining one's chances of going Greek and unplanned pregnancy/STD are of equal negativity, but I just wanted to illustrate the point that information never hurt anyone.)

Also, about hiding affiliation, read Honeychile's retro recruitment thread and tell me it was a good thing that her Rho Chi's affiliation was out in the open. Honeychile felt pressured to keep returning to her Rho Chi's chapter, because she didn't want to cut her Rho Chi's chapter in front of her. It made Honeychile resentful. Ok, I get it, "It was her decision, blah blah blah," but why put a PNM in an unnecessarily uncomfortable position?