My Sorority Pledge? I Swore Off Sisterhood

[SydneyK]

^^^ Every group of people can talk about the societal pressures applied to that group during childhood (and beyond). There are different societal expectations heaped upon everyone - girls, boys, whites, Muslims, Jews, etc... IMO, societal pressure has nothing to do with whether a mother has the potential to color her children's perceptions... of anything. Because we all know that she does indeed have that power. And so does the father. And so does the Jewish neighbor. And the Arab boy in Billy's class.

This woman, if nothing else, is conveying to me that she recognizes the perception-coloring potential she has over her children (or else she wouldn't bring up the fact that she has daughters), and that she's concerned that she doesn't know how to address it.

[AOII Angel]

Originally Posted by SydneyK

^^^ Every group of people can talk about the societal pressures applied to that group during childhood (and beyond). There are different societal expectations heaped upon everyone - girls, boys, whites, Muslims, Jews, etc... IMO, societal pressure has nothing to do with whether a mother has the potential to color her children's perceptions... of anything. Because we all know that she does indeed have that power. And so does the father. And so does the Jewish neighbor. And the Arab boy in Billy's class.

This woman, if nothing else, is conveying to me that she recognizes the perception-coloring potential she has over her children (or else she wouldn't bring up the fact that she has daughters), and that she's concerned that she doesn't know how to address it.

I don't disagree with you, but I don't think I appreciate a man saying that a mother's open distrust of women won't affect the self-esteem of her daughters like he has any experience with what it is like to grow up as a woman constantly hearing this crap about women being evil, catty and unfeeling. I don't see that the woman does recognize the risk, especially when everything she said about women in her article perpetuates this idea that women are somehow broken and need to be more like men to have good relationships.

[UGAalum94]

And there's the title of the thread and article too.

"My sorority pledge? I swore off sisterhood." I supposed we can assume that she meant only the sororities sisters who mistreated her (and I think they did), but I think other aspects about groups that she avoids indicate that she's condemning or fearing people pretty far removed from the college experience.

She basically condemns all groups of women, and I think many of us know from personal experience that her condemnation is unfounded for many if not almost all groups, especially groups of women her present age. (Some of what she observes is true, but it's human frailty rather than female frailty, if you ask me.)

Is she entitled to her feelings on a personal level? Sure. Does that mean all readers of her New York Times piece should reach a similar conclusion or validate her "groups of women are evil" mindset? Probably not.

I don't blame her for feeling like she does about her college experience and the people involved, but I don't think it's particularly representative and I don't think it's a valid way to look at women today.

[TSteven]

Originally Posted by SydneyK

^^^ Every group of people can talk about the societal pressures applied to that group during childhood (and beyond). There are different societal expectations heaped upon everyone - girls, boys, whites, Muslims, Jews, etc... IMO, societal pressure has nothing to do with whether a mother has the potential to color her children's perceptions... of anything. Because we all know that she does indeed have that power. And so does the father. And so does the Jewish neighbor. And the Arab boy in Billy's class.

This woman, if nothing else, is conveying to me that she recognizes the perception-coloring potential she has over her children (or else she wouldn't bring up the fact that she has daughters), and that she's concerned that she doesn't know how to address it.

Well said. Then again, I'm just a guy. So what do I know?

[Leslie Anne]

Originally Posted by TSteven

Well said. Then again, I'm just a guy. So what do I know?

Yes, but you're the best of men.