If they like you, hot and cold is teasing them and leading them on. Showering them with attention and then ignoring them is actually a technique to get someone to invest more time in you.
If you want to maintain some boundaries in the relationship, think about spacing your hang out time farther apart. IF you hang out all the time with people that are crushing on you its going to drive them a little nuts.
If you see them much less often it should dampen their feelings towards you until they are manageable.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dionysus
There's two people I know who has joined my circle recently (like a couple of months ago). They seem really cool, and I would like to get to know both of them better. They're pleasant/fun to be around and seem to be trustworthy...eventhough I have trust issues. So, that's big compliment coming from me. However, I'm 90% sure that both of them like me more than a friend. There's couple of reasons why I don't want to date or hook up with either of them. 1. As I mentioned earlier, I'm just not that into messing around with people within the same group of friends. 2. We are sexually incompatable.
I've been acting hot/cold around these two people. I would go from showering them with attention to pretty much ignoring them. I don't like doing that but I don't want them to get the wrong idea. If one of them asks me out, and I reject them, I'm scared it will stir a lot of drama...especially with one person. Even if I say "yes", one person will get left out, then there could be drama between them! I'm shocked there isn't any already.
BTW, I've had a horrible experience with a certain guy five years ago. Same situation. He actually accused me of being a tease, and made my life miserable. I don't want something like this to repeat!
Has anyone ever been in a similar situation? How did you handle it? How do you communicate that you would like to be good friends, but you don't "love them like that" (and not hurt their feelings)?
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