SPRING RUSH AT ALABAMA??

[33girl]

Originally Posted by AOII BAMA MOM

Have you ever heard of a sorority offering a bid to someone even though they filled their quota?

The only way they could offer a bid if they filled quota is if filling quota still didn't put them at campus total, and that isn't the case here.

[AnchorAlumna]

Originally Posted by 33girl

The only way they could offer a bid if they filled quota is if filling quota still didn't put them at campus total, and that isn't the case here.

And what if they have a couple drop out of their new member class before initiation?

[kk_bama]

Originally Posted by AnchorAlumna

And what if they have a couple drop out of their new member class before initiation?

That still wouldn't make any difference. AOPi currently has more than 200 members, and house total is 180.

[Low C Sharp]

SECMom, I'm with you. Ultimately, everybody here who obeys the TOS has a right to post whatever they want, even if it's snarky, but I'd be happy to see a little more patience with newbies.

It's striking to me that on this board, a mild insult to a CHAPTER merits a quick and universal smackdown, but yelling insults at a fellow poster is so common. I'm much less bothered by someone's opinion that the Mu Nus at Illinois are stuck-up than I am by being yelled at, and that would still be true even if I'd been an Illinois Mu Nu.

[UGAalum94]

Originally Posted by Low C Sharp

SECMom, I'm with you. Ultimately, everybody here who obeys the TOS has a right to post whatever they want, even if it's snarky, but I'd be happy to see a little more patience with newbies.

It's striking to me that on this board, a mild insult to a CHAPTER merits a quick and universal smackdown, but yelling insults at a fellow poster is so common. I'm much less bothered by someone's opinion that the Mu Nus at Illinois are stuck-up than I am by being yelled at, and that would still be true even if I'd been an Illinois Mu Nu.

I think I understand what you are saying, but the insults to the chapter in recruitment threads are taken pretty seriously because they are kind of a stupid course of action. If you don't know where you will end up with a bid, it's not smart to bust on any chapters in your 1st round reviews. Why start publicly writing off groups who might end up being your only options later?

I would like us to be a lot kinder to new posters and not be so quick to second guess their motivation. I think it's fine to ask questions simply because you are curious about how stuff works even if there's no need to know. I think it's fine to ask even if there was a thread about the same topic in 2004.

I do however think that second guessing heli-parents may be doing society a service because maybe the ones who really are hovering too much will stop and think about why they assume their children are too crippled themselves to perform basic tasks. And normal parents will have a good reason for asking, so it really shouldn't bother them. But this is a policy I'd like to see in real life too, not just Greek Chat policy.

[SECMom]

Originally Posted by UGAalum94

I think I understand what you are saying, but the insults to the chapter in recruitment threads are taken pretty seriously because they are kind of a stupid course of action. If you don't know where you will end up with a bid, it's not smart to bust on any chapters in your 1st round reviews. Why start publicly writing off groups who might end up being your only options later?

I would like us to be a lot kinder to new posters and not be so quick to second guess their motivation. I think it's fine to ask questions simply because you are curious about how stuff works even if there's no need to know. I think it's fine to ask even if there was a thread about the same topic in 2004.

I do however think that second guessing heli-parents may be doing society a service because maybe the ones who really are hovering too much will stop and think about why they assume their children are too crippled themselves to perform basic tasks. And normal parents will have a good reason for asking, so it really shouldn't bother them. But this is a policy I'd like to see in real life too, not just Greek Chat policy.

Well, unless we all become psychic second-guessing will be just that, second-guessing. It could be that the OP thought up her question all by herself. AND, it could also be that she is NOT a heli-parent. This is the internet, you just don't know. Which is why I feel like attacking people because we think that they just might adhere to a style of parenting that we disapprove of (especially those of us who haven't been at the whole parenting thing very long....). As a matter of fact, if someone is a heli-parent, they are likely to think that YOU are wrong and your opinion of them isnt' going to change a darn thing. I learned this by experience...

Let's just all play nice.........

[UGAalum94]

Oh, I don't advocate doing it rudely.

For example, in this thread, rather than the language that AlphaFrog used, I might have just said,

"AOIIMom, why doesn't your daughter just ask someone in the sorority if they will be doing an additional recruitment? Surely they will know better than we do."

(ETA: after she was given the info. or quota and total, I mean, not instead of that.)

And if AOII mom was a heliparent (I have no idea if she is or not), she'd maybe think about that for a minute. And if she wasn't, there'd be a good reason that she asked instead which she'd either share or not share depending on what the reason was.

It's really not about rudeness or oneupmanship. It's about calling attention to the possibility that what they are doing isn't the automatically reasonable thing that they think it is. I honestly believe that leaving helicopters unquestioned is partially what perpetuates the behavior. It's not normal; and the parents who do it apparently need to be reminded of that, or the rest of us are going to be dealing with their helpless offspring for a mighty long time.

[estherjb]

Originally Posted by UGAalum94

I would like us to be a lot kinder to new posters and not be so quick to second guess their motivation.

It seems like it is the same few who feel the need to crack the whip, although they crack it with vigor. Everybody was new once and if someone flamed you every time you did something "inappropriate" you might not be around now.

It takes more time and thought but you can make your point without making it at the expense of others, unless your point is to snap on someone; although I am either the pot or the kettle here because I have been guilty of the instant reply that was unnecessarily snide.

[GeekyPenguin]

Originally Posted by estherjb

It seems like it is the same few who feel the need to crack the whip, although they crack it with vigor. Everybody was new once and if someone flamed you every time you did something "inappropriate" you might not be around now.

It takes more time and thought but you can make your point without making it at the expense of others, unless your point is to snap on someone; although I am either the pot or the kettle here because I have been guilty of the instant reply that was unnecessarily snide.

I got told my chapter dirty rushed me and violated NPC rules when I was a PNM. I got over it.

[AlphaFrog]

Originally Posted by estherjb

It seems like it is the same few who feel the need to crack the whip, although they crack it with vigor. Everybody was new once and if someone flamed you every time you did something "inappropriate" you might not be around now.

It takes more time and thought but you can make your point without making it at the expense of others, unless your point is to snap on someone; although I am either the pot or the kettle here because I have been guilty of the instant reply that was unnecessarily snide.

Yes, most people here DID get flamed for doing something inappropriate when they were new here. I still remember my first flame, and it did cause me to step back and consider what I post on GC.

I have tried to be patient and ignore the helimoms, but seriously, helimoming your daughter's FRIEND, asking for info that could easily be gained by your daughter?? Come on. Yes, the daughter is probably a new member, and it is probably intimidating...but it's a life-learning experience that I think today's youth are not getting. If mommy comes in and takes us out of every uncomfortable situation, we'll never learn how to deal with it.

I did ETA and apologize for the harsh words, but no matter how you say it, my opinion still stands.