Tiers

[blondebutsmart]

Thank you to all those who sent me PMs! I was reeling somewhat from some of the responses I received. I had to step back and re-evaluate.

I thought I had "framed my questions constructively."

My purpose in asking the questions was to gain an understanding of the reasoning behind why someone would be so intent on joining a "higher tier" sorority when it might not be the best fit for them--and to determine how those girls might feel if they accepted a bid into a "lower tier" or "mid tier" sorority.

I now understand that some girls (and their moms) have been planning this time for many years. My mom is not Greek, nor is anyone in my family, so I don't have that pressure. My mom doesn't care if I do or don't join a sorority. She just wants me to become involved in SOMETHING and have fun in college (after academics are taken care of, of course).

If I go through recruitment, I wouldn't rule anyone out because of tiers (higher or lower). I was a cheerleader in high school and was probably considered popular, but I had friends in all different groups (athletes, theatre, and the academics). I think it's more important to feel connected to people rather than an image.

Thanks also to all those who posted with constructive comments. To those who didn't, well . . . I guess I wonder what's bothering you that you have to be nasty. I thought sisterhood was a bonding experience, but I'm an idealist.

[Benzgirl]

Originally Posted by blondebutsmart

Thank you to all those who sent me PMs! I was reeling somewhat from some of the responses I received. I had to step back and re-evaluate.

I thought I had "framed my questions constructively."

My purpose in asking the questions was to gain an understanding of the reasoning behind why someone would be so intent on joining a "higher tier" sorority when it might not be the best fit for them--and to determine how those girls might feel if they accepted a bid into a "lower tier" or "mid tier" sorority.

I now understand that some girls (and their moms) have been planning this time for many years. My mom is not Greek, nor is anyone in my family, so I don't have that pressure. My mom doesn't care if I do or don't join a sorority. She just wants me to become involved in SOMETHING and have fun in college (after academics are taken care of, of course).

If I go through recruitment, I wouldn't rule anyone out because of tiers (higher or lower). I was a cheerleader in high school and was probably considered popular, but I had friends in all different groups (athletes, theatre, and the academics). I think it's more important to feel connected to people rather than an image.

Thanks also to all those who posted with constructive comments. To those who didn't, well . . . I guess I wonder what's bothering you that you have to be nasty. I thought sisterhood was a bonding experience, but I'm an idealist.

When I went through Recruitment, I felt very much the same way. The only greeks I had in my family either went to very small schools or very large "greek schools" in the south.

After I pledged, I realized that some of the houses that I dropped after the first round were considered the Top Tiers. I remember one house in particular (which was suppose to be the skinny, cute, rich girls) where the girl that rushed me in the first round giggled the whole time. I had to carry the conversation. In a way, being blind to the politics of reccruitment guided me to where I felt most comfortable and least intimidated.

I had very few recs, went to no teas, didn't have a helicopter mom who planned the rest of my life during childhood, and didn't shop for a "rush wardrobe". In fact, I borrowed my roommates dress for Pref.

The only pact I made was to call my brother after pref (he was a senior at the same school) and go over my choices. My one, two and three chioces matched his exactly. It turned out that one of his very best female friends became a sister of mine and I had never met her during rush.

Put on the blinders, put in the earplugs. Forget about what others say and go with your heart.