I was one of those over-confident PNM's during recruitment and thinking back on it now, I really wish my PX had sat me down and just been honest with us about our chances. No one ever told us much about the fact that a lot of girls don't end up where they want. They kept telling us it was a mutual selection process and giving us the numbers of women placed every year (and never really making sure we realized that WE could be one of those 2% not placed rather than the 98% who got bids)
The moment that my group of friends and I first realized that sometimes it doesnt happen perfectly is actually when one of us got that dreaded phone call after preference parties to let her know she had not recieved a bid after suiciding. That was when I finally realized that the house I wanted may not actually want me enough to put me on their top list and I prepared myself to recieve a bid from a house I wasn't too thrilled about (even if I was confident, I wasn't stupid--so I kept all the houses I would be 'comfortable' joining even if they didn't dazzle me at recruitment). Thank God I did that because I did get that bid from my 'not-top house' and I ended up being President 2 years later, served on our campus Panhel, and had a Greek experience 10x better and more successful than any other girl who went through rush with me that semester.
I could have reached that point a lot earlier and taken a little less time to get used to the idea that they may love me, but they just couldn't take me if only our PX's would have been a little more realistic and maybe even harsh with us from the start. I feel like there are so many unrealistic PNM's out there that could make it through recruitment but no one takes the time to knock them down from that high horse before they get cut hard and drop out completely. (Keep in mind I go to a northern school so it's not the "I've been bred for this chapter" mentality, it's the "I was popular in high school and know 50 members of XYZ" one).
I completely agree. Although I didn't have this experience as a PNM, I see it every year. Panhel and the RC's often try and sugar coat it and that ended up blowing up in their faces last year when we switched to a different matching system and it was very different from our old one. Lots of girls who thought they were guaranteed a spot to make it back to even the SECOND night of parties and they didn't get their top ranks. Almost all of those girls simply walked out and we lost about a fourth of the girls who could have joined a sorority on campus (even if it wasn't their first pick). I think it would have helped if the matching system had been better explained and the girls had been better warned that they might not get the house they feel they are a shoo-in for.
I agree that the official word is often wildly optimistic and that offices of Greek Life and sometimes recruitment counselors can do damage because they spread the word about what should happened in the perfect world, not what will realistically happen to a particular girl in recruitment.
Even reporting 98% placement is somewhat deceptive unless you point out that it's 98% placement for girls who are willing to join whatever groups want them when the whole shebang is over.
I don't think the schools that discuss placement rates even mention the often high number of girls who drop out because they didn't like their results. And at schools like UGA, it's a pretty big number.
Thats what happens when I just start typing!
Hybrid Mode
