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  #1  
Old 06-02-2007, 10:48 PM
UGAalum94 UGAalum94 is offline
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This is random, but I'll use an example from another thread to illustrate what I mean: right now, one person is explaining how lying to her GLO to get out of having to staying active when she wanted to go alum was what she needed to do. She admits she lied, but she details how she got around the policies of her group because it's what she wanted to do, and the group couldn't/didn't stop her.

I point that out as a particular illustration of there being some people who don't do what's right or even what they've agreed to do. They instead seem to operate with the idea that they are entitled to do whatever they can get away with.

The same type of thing happens with public behavior at graduation. Most people go along with what's expected. Other people go along because they feel like they've agreed to act a certain way based on being allowed to attend. But a few others seem to take the view that they are entitled to do whatever you can't actually stop them from doing.

So if they know the cops won't come and kick them out, they they will yell or do whatever. For these people, there always have to be a punishment or penalty that they know they will face for doing what other people would just do because it was good manners.

Rather than calling in the people to forcible remove people from the graduation ceremony, this school decided to go with a different but equally undesirable "or what?" or "who is going to make me?" consequence for the people who won't do what they were asked to do. They were going to hold the diplomas of the people they came to see graduate.

They told everyone the plan way in advance. They expected the jerks to modify their behavior as not to penalize the honoree, but the jerks didn't. Now the school just needs to follow through with what was spelled out as the consequence.

I think it's fine. Sooner or later, the jerks will stop being invited to graduation.
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  #2  
Old 06-02-2007, 11:01 PM
CutiePie2000 CutiePie2000 is offline
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There's an etiquette advice columnist who I enjoy reading (Darcey Smart) and to quote her wise words:
"We live in a world where a hint of criticism is treated as an act of aggression and all and sundry feel entitled to behave any old way they like, with the exception of those of us who dare to speak up in defence of civility and are immeddiated muzzled for our pains."
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  #3  
Old 06-03-2007, 01:00 AM
kstar kstar is offline
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Location: University of Oklahoma, Noman, Oklahoma
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Alphagamuga View Post
This is random, but I'll use an example from another thread to illustrate what I mean: right now, one person is explaining how lying to her GLO to get out of having to staying active when she wanted to go alum was what she needed to do. She admits she lied, but she details how she got around the policies of her group because it's what she wanted to do, and the group couldn't/didn't stop her.

I point that out as a particular illustration of there being some people who don't do what's right or even what they've agreed to do. They instead seem to operate with the idea that they are entitled to do whatever they can get away with.

The same type of thing happens with public behavior at graduation. Most people go along with what's expected. Other people go along because they feel like they've agreed to act a certain way based on being allowed to attend. But a few others seem to take the view that they are entitled to do whatever you can't actually stop them from doing.

So if they know the cops won't come and kick them out, they they will yell or do whatever. For these people, there always have to be a punishment or penalty that they know they will face for doing what other people would just do because it was good manners.

Rather than calling in the people to forcible remove people from the graduation ceremony, this school decided to go with a different but equally undesirable "or what?" or "who is going to make me?" consequence for the people who won't do what they were asked to do. They were going to hold the diplomas of the people they came to see graduate.

They told everyone the plan way in advance. They expected the jerks to modify their behavior as not to penalize the honoree, but the jerks didn't. Now the school just needs to follow through with what was spelled out as the consequence.

I think it's fine. Sooner or later, the jerks will stop being invited to graduation.
But the penalty should always be a threat against the person committing the act, punishing someone else isn't just. What's to stop people who are pissed at another screaming then, preventing that person from getting their diploma?
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  #4  
Old 06-03-2007, 01:23 AM
AGDee AGDee is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kstar View Post
But the penalty should always be a threat against the person committing the act, punishing someone else isn't just. What's to stop people who are pissed at another screaming then, preventing that person from getting their diploma?
That's how I feel about it too. Besides the fact that it puts a 17 or 18 year old in a horrible position to try to tell their parents that they can't come to graduation. I mean, the kid (and they are still kids, really) has to live with these people, is dependent on them financially and may well need their support to get to college, etc.
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  #5  
Old 06-03-2007, 10:59 AM
UGAalum94 UGAalum94 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kstar View Post
But the penalty should always be a threat against the person committing the act, punishing someone else isn't just. What's to stop people who are pissed at another screaming then, preventing that person from getting their diploma?
Tickets assigned to a specific graduate. If it's your guest, then you lose. So if you invite the folks who scream for someone else, you lose your diploma, not the person whose name was yelled at.

The graduate did commit an act. He or she invited the losers.

I've got no problem removing or arresting the guest too, but I think it will further ruin the ceremony for the people who have been acting appropriately. ("Graduation was nice this year;they only had to remove 30 guests by force.")

I think you've got to put it on the graduate, so they send the message too: "no, I really don't want you to scream at my name. That's not cool. I want my diploma." And the yellers need to believe that the graduate means it.

I think teenagers have a lot of influence on their parents. In fact, I think a lot of parents are downright manipulated by them. And it I think it's important to remember that the school is asking the parents too. The parents are welcome to come if they won't holler and blast air horns. If a teenager can't depend on his or her parents not to do something they've specifically been asked not to do, this won't be the last time the kids is in an awkward position because of them. And that's not a good enough reason to let them ruin the graduation ceremony.

This policy will work well to create future events with the decorum the rest of the school wants. It penalized the people over whom the school legitimately has control.
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  #6  
Old 06-03-2007, 11:39 AM
Drolefille Drolefille is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Alphagamuga View Post
Tickets assigned to a specific graduate. If it's your guest, then you lose. So if you invite the folks who scream for someone else, you lose your diploma, not the person whose name was yelled at.

The graduate did commit an act. He or she invited the losers.

I've got no problem removing or arresting the guest too, but I think it will further ruin the ceremony for the people who have been acting appropriately. ("Graduation was nice this year;they only had to remove 30 guests by force.")

I think you've got to put it on the graduate, so they send the message too: "no, I really don't want you to scream at my name. That's not cool. I want my diploma." And the yellers need to believe that the graduate means it.

I think teenagers have a lot of influence on their parents. In fact, I think a lot of parents are downright manipulated by them. And it I think it's important to remember that the school is asking the parents too. The parents are welcome to come if they won't holler and blast air horns. If a teenager can't depend on his or her parents not to do something they've specifically been asked not to do, this won't be the last time the kids is in an awkward position because of them. And that's not a good enough reason to let them ruin the graduation ceremony.

This policy will work well to create future events with the decorum the rest of the school wants. It penalized the people over whom the school legitimately has control.
But here's the thing, the guest can easily ''lose" their tickets if that's an issue, and it'll come down to who they were cheering for. I don't know any high school graduation that has assigned seating.

We didn't have this problem in HS because our graduation is a Mass. But my precommencement in college did. Basically the guy just read the names very clearly into a mike. No one got covered up.

You have really negative view about teenagers and their parents. Believe me, the majority of people I know could not have controlled if their parents/relatives were going to come to graduation. Usually those people can get tickets on their own too.

And yes, it penalized the people the school has control over, but it penalized the wrong people. Removal from the property seems appropriate to me.
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  #7  
Old 06-03-2007, 11:40 AM
UGAalum94 UGAalum94 is offline
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Isn't this how things work at most clubs or events?

If you are the member of the organization hosting and your guests do something outrageous, you can expect it to have repercussions for you, right? (Sure they might ask your guests to leave at the time, but that probably won't be the end of it.)
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