Random: Recruitment

[violetpretty]

Originally Posted by OrangeJuice

6. If you end up getting a bid for a house that you don't want, take it anyway. You might end up liking it.

I agree with this. When I was a Rho Gamma this spring, one of my friends from high school went through and she ranked two chapters and got her second choice. She was crushed; even her Rho Gamma, who was in the chapter that she wanted, thought for sure that she would get her chapter. I explained to her that there's nothing she can do at this point, especially because she was a sophomore. There was no mistake. There is no getting a bid from #1 next semester. There is no getting a bid as a junior next spring. Your only choice is to give this group a try and you can walk away at any time, so why walk away before bid day?

ETA: She ended up being very happy in her #2 choice and accepted the fact that there was more than one good fit.

[CZAXOTerp]

Originally Posted by JessSigKap

I agree with this. When I was a Rho Gamma this spring, one of my friends from high school went through and she ranked two chapters and got her second choice. She was crushed; even her Rho Gamma, who was in the chapter that she wanted, thought for sure that she would get her chapter. I explained to her that there's nothing she can do at this point, especially because she was a sophomore. There was no mistake. There is no getting a bid from #1 next semester. There is no getting a bid as a junior next spring. Your only choice is to give this group a try and you can walk away at any time, so why walk away before bid day?

I agree w/ this as well, but I think it's easier to say to someone who is a freshman or perhaps a sophomore who transferred in than someone who has already spent 3+ semesters on campus and perhaps has gotten her heart set on a group (which we know a PNM shouldn't do, but sometimes it's tough not to)

Additionally PNM's who go thru rush and get & accept their 2nd (or 3rd) choice should smile & shut up about it immediately. The new member class that came into my chapter my sophmore year had a group of girls (like 4 or 5) who all pref'd another house together & put it first, but ended up in our house. Their attitudes were bad in the beginning- they thought they were better than some of their NM class because they had pref'd this house- we had to break it down to them- they didn't GET that house, that house didn't WANT them enough to put them on the 1st bid list or they would be there... at one point I told them they weren't "almost in that 'other house'" and that they needed to get over themselves and that they weren't helping anyone including themselves w/ their haughty attitude- if anything they looked like sore losers.
They ended up being a good group of sisters, and one of them even went on to be president but I remember wanting to smack them for a while!

[NUBlue&Blue]

I guess I was very lucky, I think I would've been happy in any of the three houses where I preffed way back in the day. I had been on campus long enough to know everybody's reputation and a lot of girls in each chapter, and although they were all different, I think I could've found a place in any of them. Maybe this is one of the advantages of a big system--I see a much different story on a campus with only half a dozen or so chapters. Sometimes if you don't get invited back to a place where you thought you'd fit, there isn't an alternative that seems right.

[bejazd]

Thanks BruinAPhi...you actually did answer my question about elibility to receive a bid as a quota addition with your earlier post I just didn't read it carefully enough. Please forgive!

So if you really only want to accept a bid from one house that invited you to Preference, I guess you can ISP and take your chances. But it's a really bad bet.

Rush counselors used to encourage PNMs to list any house on the Pref card from whom they were willing to accept a bid...even if they had not attended their Pref party. I have a sister who was invited to three houses at Pref, regretted AB, went to XYZ and QQQ's Pref parties, decided she wanted XYZ most, didn't want a bid from QQQ, but put down AB as a second choice on her pref card. She of course got a bid from AB, was heartbroken for about 5 minutes, then went to pledge day and spent the rest of her life happily as an AB!

and you too can live happily ever after if you choose to!!