"Why Did You Decide to Join ...That?"

[AKA_Monet]

What takes me aback with some of this is we have all signed our names on a list during an indoctrination process and we are members of our respective organizations.

Yes, there are some lax members out there who fail to pay dues for numerous reasons but still represent the organization with T-shirts. Some who do not live up to the full meaning of the pledge they make at induction. Fine. Whatever.

But to question existence is useless after it is a done deal and there is incorporation papers made. Ultimately, who cares?

I have been a member for nearly 20 years in my Sorority. If folks choose to question my intent and commitment to her, then hey, they can if they would like. But, they would be lucky to get a respectable response. I serve because I love. That is why I am a member. If that is not good enough for them, oh well. Some people live because they despise me. And that's too bad.

[SoEnchanting]

Originally Posted by AKA_Monet

I serve because I love. That is why I am a member.

Quote of the day.

[AKA_Monet]

My question to you all not a part of the D9 (NPHC) and were founded <25 years ago, aside from snarky comments from anyone, what is with this "insecurities" about the business with your respective organizations?

I mean, really, I don't care why you joined. You thought you were "__________" (insert organization here), material. So you joined it. Now that you have, I am reading strong insecurities as to the reasons' for your organization's existence that seems projected onto us from the D9.

You ought not feel insecure if what you thought was right. However, did you all honestly think your creations would not be a long, hard fought battle of legitimacy before your precedents and peers? The constant justification of your exisitence?

Hayle, you honestly think we of the D9 are never constantly berated for our own organization's existence?

Just asking because there is more here that meets the eye and a few of us speak to other higher ups who you never know might assist you... Such as maybe a NPHC developmental program, which includes stategic planning, budget development, legal historical documents, and non-profit status with fictious names.

[sbx_six_eye]

Originally Posted by rhoyaltempest

This has nothing to do with NPHC orgs having a problem with the existence of non-NPHC orgs so please get off that soapbox.

I have no problem with someone starting a new organization and if you had read some of my other posts, you would have seen that. As for putting your founder on blast...if your soror hadn't stated that one of your founders is one of my sorors, then no one would be on blast. But you can't expect to put something out there like that (something that none of my sorors have even heard about to my knowledge) and not have any of our members respond to it. As for looking thru your websites, wouldn't you be curious if someone so boldly stated that one of your sorors is one of their founders?...

Now if one of your founders is indeed one of my sorors and she hasn't abandoned her sorority but rather now has dual membership in both (if that's even allowed), then great for her. On the other hand, if she abandoned our beloved sorority to start a new one, you better hope that she doesn't become disenchanted with your organization in the future and abandon yours...to start yet another one.

I have read your other posts which is why I responded in the first place. My comments regarding members of D9 organizations was to point out that many use the "why didn't you pledge alumni chapter" (just as you did in your earlier post) as if I made the wrong choice by not deciding to join any of the NPHC orgs.

As far as the comments about our founder, my only objection is you are making accusations based on one comment. Since the forum is open to all types of comments, I expected a response, but one that tries to discredit my organization is not something I can easily ignore. If this really poses such a problem to you then there are other ways to resolve the issue.

Originally Posted by AKA_Monet

My question to you all not a part of the D9 (NPHC) and were founded <25 years ago, aside from snarky comments from anyone, what is with this "insecurities" about the business with your respective organizations?

I mean, really, I don't care why you joined. You thought you were "__________" (insert organization here), material. So you joined it. Now that you have, I am reading strong insecurities as to the reasons' for your organization's existence that seems projected onto us from the D9.

You ought not feel insecure if what you thought was right. However, did you all honestly think your creations would not be a long, hard fought battle of legitimacy before your precedents and peers? The constant justification of your exisitence?

Hayle, you honestly think we of the D9 are never constantly berated for our own organization's existence?

Just asking because there is more here that meets the eye and a few of us speak to other higher ups who you never know might assist you... Such as maybe a NPHC developmental program, which includes stategic planning, budget development, legal historical documents, and non-profit status with fictious names.

Just to respond to some of your comments...yes, I knew that by joining ANY organization I would be questioned about its existence. But what I don't appreciate is those who want to try to "pledge" me all over again about my organization. I will answer any questions (and I expect questions because that is how others will learn about who we are being that we are new and expanding to other areas), but when others try to get personal and make negative comments that is where it ends for me. There is a tendency to get defensive, but once you earn the right to wear your letters you won't let anyone that's on the outside looking in to try to make your organization look bad. If you do not want people approaching you in that way, why do it to someone else?

I know many members of greek organizations of all types who face this challenge. I also know that there is great opposition from those who don't see the need for the greek system at all. I knew going in that you should expect to have both good and bad days. Most of my experiences have been very pleasant and I have built relationships with members of other orgs who have shared some of the knowledge they have gained over the years. There are some who feel that we should not exist and do not want to offer any type of help (I have been told those words personally), but I have learned that actions speak louder than words. The only thing that I can do is to keep working and focus on what I can do to make my organization better.

[rhoyaltempest]

Originally Posted by sbx_six_eye

I have read your other posts which is why I responded in the first place. My comments regarding members of D9 organizations was to point out that many use the "why didn't you pledge alumni chapter" (just as you did in your earlier post) as if I made the wrong choice by not deciding to join any of the NPHC orgs.

You are letting people's comments affect you so personally now that you are reading too much into some things. I never suggested that you should have pledged an NPHC alumni chapter as opposed to your organization in any of my posts and I would never suggest that since I do believe that everyone has a right to join whatever they want to and for whatever reason they choose (and I stated this also in previous posts). Also, as an SGRho I can tell you that we are sometimes questioned about our choice since there are 3 NPHC sororities that came before us and there are those who STILL feel that only the first two are worth joining...and we have been in existence since 1922 with 85,000+ members. So I'm sorry but your dues will have to be paid along with everyone else's. I do understand where all of the defensiveness is coming from though since you are probably a neo and I do remember being one myself (14 years ago), but at the end of the day, this is a message board and the only thing that should matter is how you feel about your organization and what it means to you and the members. For me, it's been 14 years of answering questions about my sorority, fending off stereotypes, defending greek life and the NPHC, and on and on and on... Trust me, every seasoned member of the NPHC has paid their dues (in more ways than one and some more than others). With time you'll become more educated about greek life and you'll be able to take on anything that comes at you, in a way that will not get you so upset. I've personally found that knowing the history of my organization, the history of the D9 and other BGLO's, and the history behind the entire greek system provides me with intelligent ways to defend myself and my sorority...and you WILL have to defend yourself so get used to it. If there is anyone on this board that doesn't respect your organization currently, getting defensive and showing what some will perceive as insecurity, will not change their minds; although how you handle things might show them that you don't need their validation.

[AKA_Monet]

Originally Posted by sbx_six_eye

Just to respond to some of your comments...yes, I knew that by joining ANY organization I would be questioned about its existence. But what I don't appreciate is those who want to try to "pledge" me all over again about my organization. I will answer any questions (and I expect questions because that is how others will learn about who we are being that we are new and expanding to other areas), but when others try to get personal and make negative comments that is where it ends for me. There is a tendency to get defensive, but once you earn the right to wear your letters you won't let anyone that's on the outside looking in to try to make your organization look bad. If you do not want people approaching you in that way, why do it to someone else?

What do you mean by pledge? No one should be pledging anyone, period. I know you think there is all this underground and heard of plenty of stuff. But, stuff as it is. There is embellishment and exaggerations. Then, there is truths...

Basically, just like you said: by one's actions. Who cares if what someone says if by your actions your sorority is meeting what you think is a critical need?

I know many members of greek organizations of all types who face this challenge. I also know that there is great opposition from those who don't see the need for the greek system at all. I knew going in that you should expect to have both good and bad days. Most of my experiences have been very pleasant and I have built relationships with members of other orgs who have shared some of the knowledge they have gained over the years. There are some who feel that we should not exist and do not want to offer any type of help (I have been told those words personally), but I have learned that actions speak louder than words. The only thing that I can do is to keep working and focus on what I can do to make my organization better.

Like a said, you ought not feel insecure about the true mission of your sorority. If you want to be a bonafid organzation with perpetuity, you need to have governance usually by constitution and bylaws. Then you all need a strategic plan, long term and short term goals.

I say all this because many folks want superior organizations. Some say, because they couldn't make one of the D9's of their choice. So they start their own group, then wonder why everyone dislikes them when they show out with line names, numbers, and jackets.

Most of the D9 has stood the test of time by one thing only: Mission and Program. I don't know how long it takes to get the time relevancy, but I know it takes time.

As far as you all, Sigma Beta Xi. I have seen your lovely website. You have a niche unfullfilled. However, you all need structure beyond all the surface crap as line names, numbers and jackets. You are going to need a very strong program. And to get that, you need non profit status and membership enhancement. You will have an uphill battle because, how are your members, who are in college, that are college age having children? It's that bogus moral question? Your retort should not be aimed at us, squarely. It should be mothers need ________________, too. And there are other MOM sororities.

Then, it sounds like your program should be support mothers to be self-sufficient for the utmost in care for children. As a matter of fact, when you say, "Mom's support group"--then you all need to start you own, not just for your Sorority, but everywhere you can gain access to. What is it to be in the SBX Mom's Support Group or "Play Group"?

Do you have that right to do that? Most DEFINITELY!!! I love my Sorority, but we do not have anything like that...

[Texas Beta]

What's a D9?
What's a Kazo?


When you say some person joined 'online', is this in reference to an organization that is based on the internet?

[sigmadiva]

Originally Posted by Texas Beta

What's a D9?
What's a Kazo?


When you say some person joined 'online', is this in reference to an organization that is based on the internet?

D9 (Divine Nine) refers to the nine NPHC members:

Fraternities - A Phi A, K A Psi, PBS, Omega Psi Phi, and Iota Phi Theta

Sororities - S G Rho, DST, AKA and Z Phi B.



Kazo - * I think* it is another greek website like GC from what I gather from the people who post on here and Kazo.


The term 'on line' is an old term used among NPHC orgs. If refers to the pledge period. PNMs, or pledges, would have to essentially dress the same and when gathered together would have to walk in a straight line. The line was arranged by height of the individuals or by some other criteria only known to that chapter. 'On line' wrt the NPHC reference has nothing to do with the internet.

[12dn94dst]

Originally Posted by Texas Beta

What's a Kazo?

It is another message board. It used to be kassodias.com (kazo for short), but is now pledgepark.com.

As an aside, there are a lot of threads around here regarding some of what we do and how we work. If you fancy, search for NPHC.

[sigmadiva]

Originally Posted by AKA_Monet

What do you mean by pledge? No one should be pledging anyone, period.

But remember, many groups outside of the D9 still pledge the way we used to. I'm not saying SBX does, I'm just addressing the point you made.

Note: I did not include any of the other Greek councils because you all can answer for yourselves.

[AKA_Monet]

Originally Posted by sigmadiva

But remember, many groups outside of the D9 still pledge the way we used to. I'm just addressing the point you made.

I understand that other groups outside the D9 have a "pledging process" as the older members of the D9 experienced.

But, the way I read SBX's comments were "other people" who were not a part of her organization are "pledging her" trying to "justify" her sorority's legitimacy. Why? That's my questions, hence my comment.

Then, there is a very good reason why the D9 abandoned full official above ground pledging processes. We all know this reason. Does every single member follow it? Probably not. But it does not make it right according to our rules and regulations...

Other groups see us doing things and think that is the standard. Then, they take our "creations" and personify or capture it as their own. Then we become upset by it because we find it a mockery of us and our systems. But for us to even get to that level of thinking, we must already be feeling inadequate about ourselves and our own organizations and think we are in system failure...

These "young people"--young meaning in respect to the newness of their organizations question our intent initially as a retort or an afront to us. That is just how some people are--they have chronic hurt and unleash it in general. But, if we were all to really read past and through their pain, we will see they are begging for assistance and help. They no nothing of the struggles we have in our course of history. They know nothing that there are books that exist everywhere. And if you read demographics on the youth today, where do you think they get half their information--most of which is inaccurate to begin with?

The question from me is: do you all want the D9's experience and help? Because you all will never be at our level it took some of us at least 100 years to get where we are today. The only way to experience the D9 is to be a part of it or wait. In the meantime, gear your organizations up so that you can do that... If that is not your aim, fine. We, of the D9, are fine with that and we will keep going on with that. But, what you interpret on your campuses and communities of our actions (or inactions in some cases) may not be because of what you think initially. There is always something beyond it and it usually has to do with system governance.

I can say this, visit my International Foundation's website. It will tell you some aspects of our inner workings as an organization:

AKA EAF

[sbx_six_eye]

Originally Posted by AKA_Monet

What do you mean by pledge? No one should be pledging anyone, period. I know you think there is all this underground and heard of plenty of stuff. But, stuff as it is. There is embellishment and exaggerations. Then, there is truths...

Basically, just like you said: by one's actions. Who cares if what someone says if by your actions your sorority is meeting what you think is a critical need?



Like a said, you ought not feel insecure about the true mission of your sorority. If you want to be a bonafid organzation with perpetuity, you need to have governance usually by constitution and bylaws. Then you all need a strategic plan, long term and short term goals.

I say all this because many folks want superior organizations. Some say, because they couldn't make one of the D9's of their choice. So they start their own group, then wonder why everyone dislikes them when they show out with line names, numbers, and jackets.

Most of the D9 has stood the test of time by one thing only: Mission and Program. I don't know how long it takes to get the time relevancy, but I know it takes time.

As far as you all, Sigma Beta Xi. I have seen your lovely website. You have a niche unfullfilled. However, you all need structure beyond all the surface crap as line names, numbers and jackets. You are going to need a very strong program. And to get that, you need non profit status and membership enhancement. You will have an uphill battle because, how are your members, who are in college, that are college age having children? It's that bogus moral question? Your retort should not be aimed at us, squarely. It should be mothers need ________________, too. And there are other MOM sororities.

Then, it sounds like your program should be support mothers to be self-sufficient for the utmost in care for children. As a matter of fact, when you say, "Mom's support group"--then you all need to start you own, not just for your Sorority, but everywhere you can gain access to. What is it to be in the SBX Mom's Support Group or "Play Group"?

Do you have that right to do that? Most DEFINITELY!!! I love my Sorority, but we do not have anything like that...

My comment regarding "pledging" was not to call any org out about their activities, but to illustrate that in my experience, members of other orgs have tried to drill me about SBX as if they have a right to do so. I am sure all of you know the difference I someone just inquiring about you org and then someone coming to you in an attacking manner. That was what I referring to. Again, don't take my comment in a threatening way...but if you have experience in how to handle that then please let me know.

While I do appreciate your input regarding SBX, I just wanted you to know that we do have a constitution and bylaws already in place and various other programs that are in the works. Some of your points are in areas that I had questions in myself, but the challenge so far (in my opinion) has been the long and short term planning and determining the main focus. If the impression you got from our website is that all we are concerned with is what is on the surface I apologize for that because that is not all we stand for.

[AKA_Monet]

Originally Posted by sbx_six_eye

My comment regarding "pledging" was not to call any org out about their activities, but to illustrate that in my experience, members of other orgs have tried to drill me about SBX as if they have a right to do so. I am sure all of you know the difference I someone just inquiring about you org and then someone coming to you in an attacking manner. That was what I referring to. Again, don't take my comment in a threatening way...but if you have experience in how to handle that then please let me know.

While I do appreciate your input regarding SBX, I just wanted you to know that we do have a constitution and bylaws already in place and various other programs that are in the works. Some of your points are in areas that I had questions in myself, but the challenge so far (in my opinion) has been the long and short term planning and determining the main focus. If the impression you got from our website is that all we are concerned with is what is on the surface I apologize for that because that is not all we stand for.

No Sweetheart, there are other new greek organizations around here on GC that post all kind of stuff about what it is to be greek. No, actually, I think your sorority's website is very lovely and you all do have working programs. That was more toward your comment regarding a "Motherhood support group". I still think you all should still be in charge of one... But, baby steps are fine, too...

In regards to folks questioning you all about SBX: you are right, there is no reason for that. But, you do have to understand that probably who you are talking to are a bunch of 19-20-something year olds that are fresh from intake. That does not excuse their actions. But, you have to put an age limit. And if you are getting it from some 30-somethings or 40-somethings+, they are lame to act that way in general...

We get the harassment, too...

I don't know how to deal with stupidity, so I don't...

But, what I would do in your case in regards to "organizational planning", I would go to your city's "Foundation Board" and I know the United Way has Board trainings, and I would gather as much information I can. Your college's student affairs office should have some information. And your freebie courses like a "DiscoverU.org" has board training courses. Some groups have nonprofit assistance including the legals and the strategic plans. We call it the "Nonprofit Assistance Center" in my city. And all you need to do is know the "scientific method": Abstract, Hypothesis, Background and Significance, Specific Aims, Material and Methods, Results, Conclusions and Discussion for a well thought out strategic plan, including a budget.

PM me if you want more information.

[Jody]

SBX six eye posted: That was what I referring to. Again, don't take my comment in a threatening way...but if you have experience in how to handle that then please let me know.[/SIZE][/FONT]

Blank stares work pretty well.

[OneTimeSBX]

Originally Posted by AKA_Monet

Then, it sounds like your program should be support mothers to be self-sufficient for the utmost in care for children. As a matter of fact, when you say, "Mom's support group"--then you all need to start you own, not just for your Sorority, but everywhere you can gain access to. What is it to be in the SBX Mom's Support Group or "Play Group"?

Do you have that right to do that? Most DEFINITELY!!! I love my Sorority, but we do not have anything like that...

AKA, i dont know if Six Eye mentioned it or not, but not all the members of SBX are mothers. i know of a few members who are just concerned with issues dealing with children and women.

also, i totally agree with insuring our org is organized. its the ones that are not as put together that ultimately fall apart...