Are You Too Good For These Men?

[SoEnchanting]

Originally Posted by DSTCHAOS

In the circles that I mingle in of the different places I have lived.

lol I see you girl! *knocking on wood* I will have to holler at you for tips if I ever re-enter the world of singledom.

Gotta say though, I am very fortunate right now to have found somebody on the same wavelength as far as future goals. It just makes life easier. Nothing wrong with these guys, but based on past experiences I can't help but wonder if they are secure enough in their manhood to handle what I am trying to do with my life.

[DSTCHAOS]

Originally Posted by SoEnchanting

lol I see you girl! *knocking on wood* I will have to holler at you for tips if I ever re-enter the world of singledom.

Gotta say though, I am very fortunate right now to have found somebody on the same wavelength as far as future goals. It just makes life easier. Nothing wrong with these guys, but based on past experiences I can't help but wonder if they are secure enough in their manhood to handle what I am trying to do with my life.

I'm not in the world of singledom, either, but I can appreciate the plethora of good men around me.

Many men can handle what you're doing as long as you're unmoving in these goals. Some men will try to get you off track because they are used to women who are too accomodating. But in being unmoving with your goals, allow someone else to share your life and goals with you.

(Which I'm sure you've done because you aren't in the world of singledom.)

[Wonderful1908]

Well since I am married and have been with the same man for 12 years (I am 29) my knowledge of dating is limited. However the older I get I can say these two things.

If I ever get a divorce and get re-married it will be for stability then love. I married my husband because I love him with all my heart and I believe the same for him, but as young adults 18 years old to 29 and 30 we have grown up together and gone through alot of thick and thin. I wouldn't put up with the crap I put at 21 at 41. My mother was married for 25 years to my father and she has no intentions of playing the games at 48 she played at 18.

Second, my husband has a college degree he does not use at all. He works offshore and makes good money but if I didn't meet him at school I wonder would I have been opened minded enough to date him at this stage of life.

No matter who you are with there will be some bullsh*t from him and you, it just depends on how much you can take and what you are willing to let go.

I remeber the pastor once said at church when a couple stood up for 60 years of marriage that somebody in that relationship put up with alot of bs to be married that long, thats life.

[OneTimeSBX]

i am not 100% picky when it comes to education...i have a bachelors but my fiance has his associates...and he makes more money than i probably ever will. his first love was always cooking, so he went to a university that offered it and he has his AAS in culinary arts. he loves what he does, and i think in the end that counts more than anything. he is about to get his bachelors but i feel fortunate that in the evenings when he comes home, i get to hear about how he loves his job, and no complaints.

[RedefinedDiva]

The difference here is also between a person having a PROFESSION/CAREER or a JOB. Those are two vastly different things.

[Little32]

I think that fact that I am Dr. Little is a bit intimidating to guys sometimes. I am not picky about education either, though a bachelor's degree is generally a cut off. The "blue-collar" guy does have that, but he also has a lot of other insecurities. I don't get men sometimes.

[Sugar08]

Originally Posted by Little32

I don't get men sometimes.

Understatement of the year?

Few do, Soror.

[NinjaPoodle]

Women think I'm a THUG."

Jonathan, 24

Occupation: Recent M.B.A. graduate; financial analyst

When he's not at work: "I'm trying to start a record label with some friends."

Nice-guy cred: "I'm a gentleman. That means pulling out chairs, opening the car door, and sending flowers for no reason come standard."

He says: "When I'm not on the clock, I wear baggy pants and will even throw on a fitted cap and do-rag for good measure. But that doesn't mean I'm a thug or an immature representation of hip-hop culture-and all the baggage that goes along with that. My clothes are about one thing: comfort. When I wear my Jordans instead of my khakis, ladies in sexy business suits don't even look my way. If women would only take the time to find out who I really am, they'd see that I'm a good-hearted person."

He's looking for: "A woman who is smart and funny and will inspire me in every way."

Well sweetie, it's cause' you look like one. Standing there, lookin' like ya' gonna to shoot someone. (what is that sticking out of your back pocket?)

[Boom_Quack13]

Those guys just seem like your every day guy. Nothing really "wrong" with them.

BUT....

The article tells a little about them and lists some of their nicer qualities. You'll never see a singles profile that lists flaws. Maybe these guys have unmentioned flaws that keep them from attracting someone long-term.

Of course, I am married, but I don't know a whole lot of women who are so shallow that they would give the "excuses" that these men claim that women give them.