North vs South

[JeffersonStKKG]

hahaha!

[tunatartare]

No that would be Mommie Dearest.

[Dionysus]

Originally Posted by DSTCHAOS

Children should always have respect and deference for adults.

Literally? Not just parents or other family members? That idea has always made me uncomfortable. I know as many fucked up old people as young people. I believe that everyone should earn respect, regardless of age. You shouldn't be rude either, but going out your way to be polite and respectful just because someone is older than you doesn't make a lot of sense. According to this kind of thinking, we all should be extra polite to Tom Earp.

[UGAalum94]

It sounds like the OP's co-worker is just kind of vulgar and is raising kids to be the same way where the OP knows that she wants children who are well mannered and well behaved.

I'm afraid some people are tedious and enforce rules more about corrections and "proper" behavior as a way of looking down on people.

In spite of the church lady-type manners police, for most people good manners are a way of making sure you treat other people well and are about offering direction for situations in which being unsure could lead to bad feelings or uncertainty about how to act.

In the OP's case, her children will have the comfort and confidence of knowing how to interact with people and will know not to offend other people. The OP's co-worker's kids will unfortunately learn that they aren't so lucky. A good segment of society doesn't want to be around people belching and farting and announcing their belches and farts. I don't think it's limited to the South.

[OOhsoflyDELTA#9]

Originally Posted by Dionysus

What's wrong with answering "what?" I never heard of this.

What is considered rude coming from a child to an adult..I said(was required to say) "yes ma'am/sir"..coming up...at the very least "yes"...."what" would get you popped in the mouth...its a respect thing, respect your elders...maybe its regional maybe its cultural...but I can't stand it when I hear a child speak that way to an adult...my daughter is always like around them because she can't believe how they act...she tells them I would be in BIG trouble for that...

ETA: I asked the original question from a regional standpoint because my friends says that "everyone" or all her friends in Syracuse acts the same way...she calls me prissy and I believe I'm far from that..

[UGAalum94]

Originally Posted by Dionysus

Literally? Not just parents or other family members? That idea has always made me uncomfortable. I know as many fucked up old people as young people. I believe that everyone should earn respect, regardless of age. You shouldn't be rude either, but going out your way to be polite and respectful just because someone is older than you doesn't make a lot of sense. According to this kind of thinking, we all should be extra polite to Tom Earp.

Not bow down to people, just default to being respectful. There's no reason that kids shouldn't also be respectful to their friends. Respect doesn't equal worship.


What does one gain waiting to see if someone is worthy of being addressed most politely?

[JeffersonStKKG]

I call so many women "ma'am" that some people feel that I'm "respecting the elderly"---even those younger than me..hahaha. But yes, "ma'am/sir" are quite respectful. As far as "mommie dearest", my parents are Mama and Daddy.

[DSTCHAOS]

Originally Posted by Dionysus

Literally?

Yes.

Children are not equipped to distinguish "real adult" from "fake adult." Unless an adult is being abusive, children should always show respect even if the adult appears to be an idiot. Some children are taught to be respectful as long as the adult is catering to them because the world obviously revolves around them. However, children should not be allowed to be disrespectful because they are not getting their way.

[DSTCHAOS]

Originally Posted by tunatartare

No that would be Mommie Dearest.

We know.

[GeekyPenguin]

Originally Posted by OOhsoflyDELTA#9

What is considered rude coming from a child to an adult..I said(was required to say) "yes ma'am/sir"..coming up...at the very least "yes"...."what" would get you popped in the mouth...its a respect thing, respect your elders...maybe its regional maybe its cultural...but I can't stand it when I hear a child speak that way to an adult...my daughter is always like around them because she can't believe how they act...she tells them I would be in BIG trouble for that...

ETA: I asked the original question from a regional standpoint because my friends says that "everyone" or all her friends in Syracuse acts the same way...she calls me prissy and I believe I'm far from that..

Somebody who thinks there is something wrong from drinking beer out of the bottle is a priss.

[SororChic6]

I live in Brooklyn. I was raised to be polite but as a child, I answered "what" to adults. It does not seem like such a big deal to me. Also, if you take the train every morning at 8AM, you tend to see people forgetting their manners. I've seen everything on the train, from people burping to letting out body fluids. (Not too fun!) Aside from train horror stories, we are not all without manners.

[macallan25]

I've been to New York several times.......and I can't think of one trip when I was not floored at how rude and dickheadish those people are. Its almost comical.

[SororChic6]

We're tough, it may be mistaken as rude.

[PM_Mama00]

If I answered "excuse me" to someone I didn't hear, that would be considered being sarcastic or being a bitch.

If I answered "yes ma'am/sir" to my parents, that would be considered as being sarcastic or bitchy.

I"ve found that if you call someone ma'am, sir, miss, etc they take it as someone being condescending towards them. There were these two girls in a restaurant the other day and they were calling the cooks (Mongolian BBQ) sweety and honey. It made me cringe until I realized they had southern accents.

I like being able to be myself around people and not having to worry if I used the wrong fork or if I should have called someone ma'am or miss or Ms.

[SororChic6]

Yes, I've experienced the same reaction from calling people "sir" or "maam." They get offended because it implies that they are old. Also, I've had many occassions where I would let an elderly woman ahead of me on the bathroom line or offer her my seat and she would get offended from this.