Eliminating Bigs and Littles? - Page 3

Buttonz · #31 10-02-2006, 10:06 PM

My chapter only gave gifts at intiation. IT was supposed to be a pillow & a set of letters from the big. Often, the big would give more...a lto more, if they could afford it. I can remeber at least one semster where the rule was put in palce if you give anything more then one set of letters a nd a pilliow, it had to be done in private, because there were a few of us there were able to spend more/spent mroe even fi they couldn't afford it (got to love credit cards!), and they didn't want anyone else feeling bad. It semeed to work pretty well.

I'll admit to being one of those girls who over spent on her litte, part of htat reasoning being she started her NM program the semster before, dropepd due to personal reasons, and the Friday before we were about to start our NM program I got a call from a girl that worked with her telling me that she decided to come back and re-go through the NM program (she wasn't sure about it, because she wasn't sure if she would be able to and didn't want to drop again) and finished it, and I was so proud of her for coming back, that I spoiled her.

lyrica9 · #32 10-03-2006, 01:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by adpiucf

ADPi's Diamond Sister program was formed with this intention. On paper, the Delta (initiated sister) sponsors the Alpha (new member) through her new member period as a personal mentor and guide to acclimate her to Greek Life and serve as her sponsor through ritual. All new member gifts, on paper, are to be budgeted through the chapter so that more women can serve in this sponsor role without assuming a financial burden. On paper, there are no "families" and the Diamond Sister relationship formally concludes with initiation.
......

The Pride Program is a great concept-- rotating small groups to help members get to know one another better, serve on committees and support the chapter (IE. XYZ Pride takes on Task A, ABC Pride takes on Task B, etc...), but it's another system that really doesn't work well in practice when you have members who are already overprogrammed enough as it is with school, sorority and life. Getting together as a pride to bake cookies is sometimes just one more activity that can't be crammed in there-- it's like setting up a playgroup!

mmk.. from what i remember the diamond sister relationship is to continue after initiation, but you're right that a lot of people call them bigs/littles (i myself now have a great-great-grand litte, ack!).

and about the pride system, while good in theory, doesn't really exist anymore. the new leadership program which started the class coordinators system seemed to replace prides, and we're now supposed to do things with those groups.

ADqtPiMel · #33 10-03-2006, 06:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lyrica9

mmk.. from what i remember the diamond sister relationship is to continue after initiation, but you're right that a lot of people call them bigs/littles (i myself now have a great-great-grand litte, ack!).

and about the pride system, while good in theory, doesn't really exist anymore. the new leadership program which started the class coordinators system seemed to replace prides, and we're now supposed to do things with those groups.

Adpiucf is correct that technically, the diamond sister relationship concludes at initiation - learned it at DLC two years ago from my DTD.

The pride and class coordinator systems are awesome in theory, but I was so unbelievably overprogrammed in college, I never had time to go to any events. And I was a very involved chapter member.

sisterzip · #34 10-03-2006, 10:49 AM

I dont think that elimanting Big/little would be a good idea. New members/ pledges need at least one sister they know they can always turn to. During the "last week" of my pledgeship it was my big sister that got me through. Big/little, Diamond sister It doesnt matter what its called. Unless we were calling them something degradig like "lil saves" I also dont see the point in changing the name.

SydneyK · #35 10-03-2006, 12:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sisterzip

I also dont see the point in changing the name.

This is purely speculation on my part, but I assume the name change is simply because that's the current NPC trend. Rush is now recruitment, pledges are now new members, parties are called events, etc... I think our (I)HQs believe that it may seem more PC if names are changed to be more reflective of the specific sorority. Like ADPi's have Alpha/Delta members and Diamond Sisters; Sigma Kappa has Violet Sis; Tri Sigma has Pearl Pals; the list is endless.

But, like someone has previously said, even though sororities are unique, the women in them seem to want pretty much the same things. When I was VP-Pledge Ed, my Tri Sigma roommate was VP-New Member Education. On my campus, Sigma was the first org to use "New Member" instead of "Pledge", and those women WANTED to be called pledges. Probably just because all the other new members on campus were still being called pledges.

Like most others here, I think it would be a mistake for NPC to do away with the Big/Lil programs. While my Big's "responsibilities" ended upon my initiation, we're still extremely close. And, while I realize we might have developed this close bond without the Big/Lil program, it certainly helped start that bonding process. It would be a shame for that aspect of sisterhood to be lost.

adpiucf · #36 10-03-2006, 12:23 PM

I don't think Big/Lil is going anywhere, but chapters and Greek systems need to enforce the spending caps so more women will take on the opportunity to sponsor a new member.

33girl · #37 10-03-2006, 12:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SydneyK

This is purely speculation on my part, but I assume the name change is simply because that's the current NPC trend. Rush is now recruitment, pledges are now new members, parties are called events, etc... I think our (I)HQs believe that it may seem more PC if names are changed to be more reflective of the specific sorority. Like ADPi's have Alpha/Delta members and Diamond Sisters; Sigma Kappa has Violet Sis; Tri Sigma has Pearl Pals; the list is endless.

As explained by the ADPis on here, Diamond sisters are supposed to NOT be the same as a traditional big/little relationship (theoretically).

And as for SK, they have about 3 different names, all of which are different kinds of relationships. ASA has a "Ruby Sister." She's NOT a big - it's a totally different thing.

I have no problem with calling things different names, if they are different things.

violetpretty · #38 10-03-2006, 01:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SoCalGirl

We had Heart Sis, Big Sis, and Violet Sis. I was closest to my Violet Sis's. I had one as a pledge and then had two as an Active.

I think I've also heard of Dove Sis's but not sure how they work.

I would assume that heart, violet, and dove sisters are essentially the same, just that NMs would get them at different times during their NM period.

Jestor · #39 10-03-2006, 01:40 PM

I for one would be horrified if the Big/Little system were eliminated from DSP or any Greek organization for that matter (and no, there's been not even a sniff of that anywhere in DSP).

Not only is Big Bro Night one of the best nights of pledging as others have indicated, but by placing a strong emphasis on lineage like our chapter does, you have a greater sense of connection with both the actives and the alumni.

I'm extremely proud of my lineage and I talk to my big brother and grandfather (as we call two generations before us) often and lineage is something I intend to strongly stress with the little bro I have this semester.

adpiucf · #40 10-03-2006, 02:24 PM

Many sororities are discouraging of the whole lineage bit, though, as a way to discourage cliquish behavior and excluding others.

I don't think that will ever go away, though. When you're Greek, you just want to be "related" to everyone: Big/Lil, Grandbig, Adopted Lil, Flower Sister, Diamond Dyad, Twin, Panhellenic Sis, Fraternity Big, etc...

SoCalGirl · #41 10-03-2006, 04:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JessSigKap

I would assume that heart, violet, and dove sisters are essentially the same, just that NMs would get them at different times during their NM period.

Heart Sis was the woman that Pref'd you. You get her on Bid Day.

Big Sis - usually about 4-5 weeks in to pledging. The NM would submit her pref list of who she wanted as her big. The VP-NME would then match up bigs/lils. The lil would find out who her big was at revealing at the end of Mystery Week.

Violet Sis - the NM would pick the NM that most inspired her. During Inspiration Week the NM would leave poems/clues for the member and after initiation the NM would reveal who her Violet Sis was.

33girl · #42 10-03-2006, 04:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SoCalGirl

Heart Sis was the woman that Pref'd you. You get her on Bid Day.

Big Sis - usually about 4-5 weeks in to pledging. The NM would submit her pref list of who she wanted as her big. The VP-NME would then match up bigs/lils. The lil would find out who her big was at revealing at the end of Mystery Week.

Violet Sis - the NM would pick the NM that most inspired her. During Inspiration Week the NM would leave poems/clues for the member and after initiation the NM would reveal who her Violet Sis was.

OMG thank you.

My friend is a Sig Kap and tried to explain all this to me and I didn't get it.

SoCalGirl · #43 10-03-2006, 04:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 33girl

OMG thank you.

My friend is a Sig Kap and tried to explain all this to me and I didn't get it.

Yeah it can be very confusing! I was always confused and curious by chapters that had the Big Sis be the girl that Pref'd you. It just seemed unfair to the other chapters that they weren't constantly getting another ___ Sis.

BaylorBean · #44 10-03-2006, 05:10 PM

My Chapter did it a bit differently.

Heart Sis: Random match up on Bid day, served as your "big" for the first half of pledging. They were matched based on "broken hearts" (like the BFF necklaces). The active made the heart cut it in half and at the Bid activities the NM would pick a half and find her match.

Big Sis: Same as what SoCal said. Often the Heart Sis became your big (my little was my heart sis)

Violet sis: A more senior active who leaves you notes/presents/encouragement durring I-week. She is revealed on "Violet night". I think you were just assigned to someone, don't quite remember though.

I think my chapter now has pearl pals too. Not sure though.

SigKapBling · #45 10-03-2006, 07:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SoCalGirl

Heart Sis was the woman that Pref'd you. You get her on Bid Day.

Big Sis - usually about 4-5 weeks in to pledging. The NM would submit her pref list of who she wanted as her big. The VP-NME would then match up bigs/lils. The lil would find out who her big was at revealing at the end of Mystery Week.

Violet Sis - the NM would pick the NM that most inspired her. During Inspiration Week the NM would leave poems/clues for the member and after initiation the NM would reveal who her Violet Sis was.

see our Heart sis was the woman that got you on bid day - but it was only for a week. and it wasnt the girl that pref'd you. random selection for all the active members to be able to get to know the NM's. and every week the NM would get a new Heart sis.
thats how it worked at my school. As for Violet sis .. dont even think we had that. just Heart Sis, Big/Lil Sis, and ... i think thats all i recall.