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07-07-2007, 08:44 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 26
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What is the it factor for you to separate a friend/lover?
What is it for you that separates someone who's a friend from someone who you want to be with? Is it a specific trait? Is it a specific feeling? Is it not quantifiable?
What is the it factor for you?
For me, its all about chemistry, which in a way is one of those non quantifiable things, but you sometimes 'just know' the difference. There is that spark or that look or that feeling. There is that sense of explosiveness or closeness that comes from just being around someone...
Do you think that 'it' can grow or be born if it wasn't there at first? Someone you were platonic with for years, could you one day realize, wow, there IS something there? Is the opposite true as well?
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07-07-2007, 12:50 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: only the best city in the world
Posts: 6,261
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For me, it's learning from that person. I minute i've learned something valuable from the guy, all of a sudden i'm like "yowza! you're hot!"
guess it's why i fall for teachers, professors, guidance counselors, coaches, tutors and men generally older than me.
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Do you know people? Have you interacted with them? Because this is pretty standard no-brainer stuff. -33girl
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07-07-2007, 05:53 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: Washington, DC
Posts: 752
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tld221
For me, it's learning from that person.
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Yes! This has been the "it" factor for me as I've gotten older. When I meet someone that is so knowledgable about something (or several things), that's a really attractive quality to me. I'm talking to someone now that is really into politics. I've never been into politics, but I could listen to him talk about it all day! lol! I just love to hear his perspective on it and why he decided to get involved, etc. So these days, I'm starting to go for really educated guys. Lately, anyone that I've met that has not completed their college educations (or even begun them), usually get put in the friend zone  Nothing against them for not pursuing their education, but I just find that the conversation can be lacking in areas.
Another "it" factor would be guys that are really goal-oriented and actually try to accomplish their goals. I've met a lot of guys that have a lot of goals, but don't really try to accomplish any. That's such a turn off and they usually end up just being my friend.
Last edited by ZChi4Life; 07-07-2007 at 05:58 PM.
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07-07-2007, 06:38 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 1,317
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tequilla
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alphasigmaalpha
zeta theta
Loving would be easy if your colors were like my dream, red, gold, and green.
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07-07-2007, 06:45 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: only the best city in the world
Posts: 6,261
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tld221
For me, it's learning from that person.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cuteASAbug
tequilla
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well, whichever comes first...
__________________
Do you know people? Have you interacted with them? Because this is pretty standard no-brainer stuff. -33girl
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07-07-2007, 08:24 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Sep 1999
Location: NY
Posts: 8,594
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If I am having sex with her she is a lover, if I am not she is a friend. Simple.
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07-07-2007, 10:41 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Beyond
Posts: 5,092
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cuteASAbug
tequilla
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Mojitos or cosmos will do it for me
Seriously though: Do you EFF your friends?
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We thank and pledge Alpha Kappa Alpha to remember...
"I'm watching with a new service that translates 'stupid-to-English'" ~ @Shoq of ShoqValue.com 1 of my Tweeple
"Yo soy una mujer negra" ~Zoe Saldana
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07-08-2007, 01:12 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Twin Cities
Posts: 6,715
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For me it's the physical appearance 1st. It would be very hard for me to remain friends with someone I'm physically attracted to. On top of that if she's funny and makes me laugh, and she's someone I can connect with emotionally. Also, she has similar moral values too.
Really, I don't have any female friends and I never have had any. Someone always seems to want something more so for me it's always been in a relationship status, never friends. I just don't think men and women can be friends without someone wanting more. In some rare cases it happens though, it just hasn't happened for me.
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The world system is in direct opposition to God and His Word — PrettyBoy The R35 GT-R doesn’t ask for permission. It takes control, rewrites the rules, and proves that AWD means All-Wheel Dominance — PrettyBoy
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07-08-2007, 01:13 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Twin Cities
Posts: 6,715
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Quote:
Originally Posted by James
If I am having sex with her she is a lover, if I am not she is a friend. Simple.
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LMAO
__________________
The world system is in direct opposition to God and His Word — PrettyBoy The R35 GT-R doesn’t ask for permission. It takes control, rewrites the rules, and proves that AWD means All-Wheel Dominance — PrettyBoy
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