Thank You Notes

[TSteven]

Originally Posted by nittanyalum

LOLOLOL. Wow, you got hosed with the writing-down-the-gifts duty! That's usually the fun detail for the MOH or a bridesmaid to take care of.

And yeah, usually guys get it much easier on the gift front. I don't think gifts are expected at bachelor parties, right? You just buy drinks all night, maybe pay for dinner if that's involved, split the cost of, ahem, the "entertainment" for the evening.... Then just buy one gift for the wedding. Girls get sucked into multiple gifts because shower = gift, wedding = gift, and I've been in bridal parties where the bridal party goes in together on yet ANOTHER gift (plus the bridesmaid dress, shoes, hair, etc etc etc). It is NOT cheap being people's friends when they get married!!!!

What is a MOH? As I recall, there was only one bridesmaid at the party. Her college bridesmaids were from her chapter and they (the chapter) had already thrown her a shower. I think that is why I got stuck with secretary duty.

I don't think I have ever been to a bachelor party where "real" gifts were involved. A few times, gag gifts were given. But yeah, normally there is a gift the bride (and/or the couple, he might like that avocado green blender) and then going in on the bachelor party (or night out) and whatever that might, *cough, cough*, entail.

[ComradesTrue]

Originally Posted by SWTXBelle

My other pet peeve - bringing presents to the reception. Send them before, to the bride at her home address, or afterwards to both of them at their new address, but don't saddle someone (usually the bride's family) with having to try and store your gift without losing the card.

This bears repeating.... people, please do NOT take gifts to the reception.

We had 6 gifts where the card got separated from the box. That does not count the multiple cards that we received that were just well-wishes (those people had mailed a gift instead) and were not originally attached to a box.

We had to wait until all gifts arrived through the mail to figure out which 6 people likely had brought one of the 6 mystery gifts. Then we had to call and explain the embarrassing situation and ask those people if they had indeed brought a gift to the reception, and then ask them to tell us what it was so that we could properly acknowledge the gift in a thank you note. Awful.

In addition, it was pouring, pouring rain on our wedding day. We left and went to a hotel, and our sweet families and friends had to take over 100 boxes up to our 3rd floor apartment. In the pouring rain.

So.. I will say it again. Do not take gifts to the reception. Either mail them or hand deliver before or after the wedding. Miss Manners endorses this as well.

[christiangirl]

Originally Posted by TSteven

What is a MOH?

Maid (Matron) of Honor

[PeppyGPhiB]

Originally Posted by TSteven

Wow. I never heard of giving more than one gift. Then again, I have only attended a few work related bridal showers (kind of mandatory). However; in college, a good friend from my hometown was getting married that summer and some of our mutual friends were unable to attend her wedding. So I hosted what I thought was simply a "Stock the Bar" party. I was later informed that I was actually hosting a co-ed bridal shower and as such, had to follow certain bridal shower protocol. Such as when the bride opens her gifts, I had to write down what she said. And this represented what she was supposed to say on her wedding night. I have never blushed so much in my life. Nor have I seem so many guys hit the "punch" more than at that party.

"Stock the Bar" showers are great! The best shower I ever went to was a co-ed Stock the Bar. The guys got really into picking out cool gifts!

[TSteven]

Originally Posted by christiangirl

Maid (Matron) of Honor

Whew. I was afraid it might mean "Mother of the Ho".

[TSteven]

Originally Posted by PeppyGPhiB

"Stock the Bar" showers are great! The best shower I ever went to was a co-ed Stock the Bar. The guys got really into picking out cool gifts!

Yeah, this couple made out like bandits.

[pinkyphimu]

[QUOTE=Blondie93;1659024]This bears repeating.... people, please do NOT take gifts to the reception.

Last summer, FI and I went to a wedding and he REFUSED to have the gift shipped to his friends. He HAD to bring it to the wedding. There was no arguing and I figured, whatever, the couple were not my friends. Now, we are in the midst of wedding planning. Our wedding is in PA (we live in MA). We are leaving from NYC the day after our wedding for our honeymoon. FI keeps saying how he hopes people do not bring gifts to the wedding because we have no idea what we will do with them! Now he realizes that he has been the worst wedding guest ever and feels badly for making people cart this stuff around! I am certain he will ship all future wedding gifts!

[Benzgirl]

Originally Posted by deadbear80

I know when I had my Bat Mitzvah, some folks (especially out-of-towners) sent presents in advance. When something came in the mail, she had me sit down and write one IMMEDIATELY that way a) I didn't forget and b) it gave me less to do later. When the actual Bat Mitvah party was over on Saturday she made me write 10 more, and other 10 more the next day before my kids' party. And every day after that it was 10 more until they were done. When I got home from school even before homework I had to write them so they got out as quick as possible.

15 years later, as soon as I get a gift...I write a thank you note. And like for graduations where I had multiple gifts, I subscribed to the 10 a day rule. It made life a lot easier. And no one has ever complained they haven't gotten a timely one or one that was more than just 'thanks for the gift'.

Your mother is a gem. She taught you correctly!

[BabyPiNK_FL]

I have noticed that many weddings have a "hostess" or "host" whose responsiblity is to take care of gifts, anything the bride or groom needs pre/post wedding. Helps everyone find their seats at the receptions and deals with the guestbook. I definitely plan on having one. Also, many people accomodate gifts with a gift table. The biggest problems I have seen at these weddings are the guests dragging them around during cocktail hour before the reception venue opens.

I definitely plan on accepting gifts at the event. But I guess that is just tradition in this area? I've never heard of sending it ahead until now.